Lucky

Well, it's that time of year. The part where we're grateful and eat a lot. (A good combination.) I don't want to go too corny with each sentencing beginning with "I'm thankful for..." so I just want to talk about how good things are. :)
John actually chose a good time to do his training. Times might have been tough for the holidays this year, but the military has taken care of us amply. And I saved enough to buy John's plane ticket! I'd saved just enough. (I even had been able to splurge on a gorgeous dress to wow him with at a nice dinner over Christmas.)
I have an adorable cat that is devoted to me, even if he does bite a lot. The other night I was having nightmares and Miles paced around me and kept waking me up and sat on my pillow by my head, trying to stand guard against the bad dreams. When I get home every day he allows a hug (he gets the Patient Pet look) and as I bury my face in his fur I can feel the stress I didn't know was there melting away.
I have health insurance that covers stuff for the first time ever!
I've learned how to have a pretty good relationship with my parents. And family stuff has been pretty tranquil the past little while.
I haven't had a panic attack in a few years now. I'm learning to deal with my problems instead of hide from them.
In fact, I really can't complain about anything. Sure, I miss John so much I can't breathe. But, how the hell did I get so lucky to have someone so wonderful? There's no question that we're faithful to each other. There's no doubt that we love each other. I was so scared of getting married. I didn't believe in relationships. I was sure that "all that shimmers in this world is sure to fade away again" (Fuel). I'd never have guessed I was capable of loving someone this much. And I thank God every day for giving him to me. I can never pay Him back. Never.
So, I have a lot to be thankful for - a debt to pay to those who've taken care of me through life. And on top of it all: I get to eat pecan pie in two days! Definitely off the charts in the "boo-yah" department. And I hope you all have an awesome holiday. Don't count calories, go to bed when you want, sing with the radio, and definitely have another slice of pie for me. ;)

I think I'll be a kitty this weekend.

Wow! The past few weeks have been crazy. Tests and papers and labs and such. I got 40% on my Chemistry test. A new record for my lowest score of all time. The class average was so low my professor won't tell us. She's giving partial credit for "close" answers, so the average will be 65% (an F) after she adds points. But, then I got my Calculus test back with 92%. Eh? Who knows. But, I'm celebrating in my math score and I'll just deal with whatever happens in Chemistry. If I end up taking it twice, I will just be really good at it by the time I'm done. I'm happy it's the weekend, that's for sure.
Johnny went to the military dentist and found out that the people who took out his wisdom teeth left a root behind... and now he probably has a large cyst because of it and will definitely have mouth surgery before he's done with AIT. We also learned that the company he drives for might be going under and he might not have a job when he gets home. But, he is still incredibly chipper, despite his crappy luck. ;) Right now we don't care about that stuff. We just want to be together. Everything will be alright as long as we're together.
Some good news: the car accident from April is almost resolved! The other car's insurance and I have come to an agreement and settlement. It's quite a favorable settlement, too. But I'm still nervous about signing that paper that releases everything. Since this started signing anything makes me nervous. I'm glad it will finally be over. It's been hard, but it brought John and I closer together. You never know when one day some chick will run a red light and change your lives. And if John had been going a little faster, my life would have changed a lot.
So, this weekend I just want to curl up in a warm blanket, cuddle with Miles (he's a gray kitty and I'm a white kitty-at-heart), soothe my sinus infection, and let a few things melt away. It's not every week you feel like an idiot and a genius within a couple of days. It's kind of draining. So, a cat's life for me this weekend. Nibbling, napping, and... something else that starts with an N. Ninja-style playing!
Highlight of the week: I get to keep my conodonts! Won't that be a great conversation starter? (And they were Pennsylvanian, by the way.) I'll need to find a place to display them. Well, my resting time is about to start (Ghosthunters here I come).
Let the weekend begin!!!

Time inching by.

This has been a long week. I've had tests, papers, and two labs to do. One of those labs was pretty intense. Each group in my paleontology class had a chunk of limestone. We put in the rock crusher, which knocks it around and breaks it up into little pieces. Then we put that in a strainer and put it in an acid bath for a day. (Acid! Eeeheehee!) Then we take it out of the bath and put it through a couple of strainers so that we got a collection of very fine-sized particles. We baked that off for a few days to dry it out. The longest part comes next: going through all of that in very small portions under a microscope searching for tiny little teeth. (It takes hours. The picture shows some of the teeth on a nail. It's blown up and bit blurry, but... AH, YEAH!) The teeth belonged to eel-like creatures called conodonts. Their teeth are referred to as "elements." The cool thing is that depending on the kind of elements found and their color, a paleontologist can help an oil company know whether to drill for oil or not in the specific area the limestone was obtained. Isn't that awesome?!? And when my professor gets back from his trip, we need to tell him the age of the rock. I'm thinking Pennsylvanian at this point, but I will be doing more in-depth classifying if possible.
And Johnny can call me now! Much more frequently! It makes me so happy. He's in Alabama now. He graduated from Basic Training yesterday. I didn't make it out there. We decided together that I should stay home. It was hard, but we can do anything. I love him so much! The closer Christmas gets, the longer it seems to be taking. All I want is to spend a day at home with him with nothing else in the world. No homework, no army, no work, no nothing. "Makin' banana pancakes, pretend like it's the weekend now. We could pretend it all the time... We could close the curtains, pretend like there's no world outside. We could pretend it all the time... The telephone is singin', ringin', it's too early, don't pick it up. We don't need to. We got everything we need right here and everything you need is enough. Just so easy when the whole world fits inside of your arms, don't really need to pay attention to the alarm. Wake up slow. Wake up slow." (Banana Pancakes, Jack Johnson) It will be so nice -- we haven't had time to just be together since our first year married. John's worked so hard for us to get by. He's gotten us through 5 years together (surgeries, car accident, job changes). And he's worked some really crappy jobs to get us through. I'm so grateful to him. He deserves this time. And I'm going to make it as wonderful as I can. :)

I'm ready for wintertime!

And some snowiness has arrived. I'm excited for that because it means: Christmas is comin'! But I also love the coziness of winter. It brings with it the need for hot soup and fragrant bread. Cinnamon rolls. Christmas songs! (It's a nice break from the themes "love is great" or "love sucks," now, isn't it?)
When John was little (and he'll freak out when he sees this *evil grin*) he put on his snow pants and winter coat and hat and I think a scarf and went out in the middle of summer and started jumping on the trampoline, chanting, "I'm ready for wintertime! I'm ready for wintertime!" I love that story. Sometimes that happy little boy peeks out of my Johnny's eyes when he opens an exciting present or tastes something yummy.
When we were engaged we made a snowman in the backyard of where he was staying. We put giant sticks for arms on it and a big bucket on its head for a hat. And of course we had a snowball fight which turned into an illegal tackle on John's part (and some kissin' *heehee*).
I always spoil him like crazy at Christmas. The cutest thing about him at Christmas is that he can't wait to sneakily buy my presents. He'll see me like something and announce he's buying it for Christmas. Now he's gotten so he'll send me to a different area and buy "something" somewhat sneakily. He's so funny.
So, besides having cuddly memories, snowiness brings warm sweateriness and hot chocolatiness that makes me want to put on those giant fuzzy socks of obnoxious colors and watch a sweet movie. And force Miles to lay on my lap. (For a minute.) And there's something about the musty smell of the heater running for the first time of the year.
Good times.

Cover me with words.

I love to read. Growing up I found three ways to lose myself: reading, video games, and playing the piano. The interesting thing about it is that through losing myself I find myself. Every time.
Our second bedroom has 3 bookshelves in it. (There's also one in our kitchen waiting to be decided on.) These three bookshelves are full of books. Fantasy, SciFi, children's books, historical fiction, textbooks, biographies, relgious books, poetry, comics (of the funny and the awesome varieties), mysteries, old journals... I love seeing the way different authors trick the words around to express their idea. And some of these people found a way of writing, of glowing through paper, that has never been duplicated. No one writes like Mark Twain. You'll never find another work like his and when you read through it, you know his voice. The quiet brilliance of Jane Austen is unmatched. And Shakespeare, he and God have gotta be pals. L.M. Montgomery has a warmth to her books that I crave. e.e. cummings is a master. Pablo Neruda's heart could swallow me so easily. Diana Wynne Jones has an imagination beyond the creativity on most shelves. And Peter S. Beagle can disappear into his characters so you forget his silent steps across the page.
I've never understood when people tell me they don't like to read. And friends of mine who struggle to read and can't enjoy it, I just feel overwhelmingly sad for them. Because it's such a part of me and my life. I will actually pick up an ancient volume and open to a random page and just smell those pages. I don't know what it is, but it's the sun to me. I can be anything when I open a book. I can go anywhere. And I forget what hurts. Just for a moment. And someday I'll thank those wonderful minds I could turn to in hard times. Terry Brooks and Rita Mae Brown. Laura Ingalls Wilder and Orson Scott Card. C.S. Lewis and Walt Whitman. And the Berenstains are getting a big hug from me eventually. (I love those bears!)
Johnny and I always love to pass an evening together reading aloud from our favorites. Getting lost together. It's magic.

Creepy it was!

Halloween was a good day! I ended up dressing up as: John. The funniest costume I've had. I wore his camoflage pants and Spiderman shirt and Zelda hat. I even drew on a little goatee with my eyeliner pencil. My mom took pictures of me in John-like poses (looking stern, flexing, Miles-on-the-shoulder) so I can send them to him. I'm sure he'll enjoy that. Then I just spent the night giving treats to kids. There was a cute little firefighter that was a little scared of my stairs so I went down to him to give him his candy. He was so cute! I said he was a cool firefighter and he confidently agreed with me. A couple of friends brought their 2-year-old girl to get a treat, too. She was a female pirate. I watched my Ghosthunters and wrote to Johnny and unpacked a little bit. How was Halloween for all of you? I hope it was just creepy enough to have a good time! One more evil laugh until next year: Buwahahahahahaha!