To be on stage, is to forget that you're on stage. To truly be there with all your senses, you have to forget that there's a stage, and live inside yourself.
You have to only recognize who you are, and interact with others as who you identify them as. To live on stage, is to remember that you're there, and only there.
I cried on stage, and I was so ashamed, being the character, and being myself...
So many things.
Like, how people can be misunderstood.
like, realizing that you really do NOT know everything. not only realizing it, rather feeling it, knowing it with all your senses.
When the street is empty even though it's not 6AM, and it's not 3 AM, either. Sun, and serenity ant the same time.
Precious moments. Really.
When you realize that you're not ugly. You're even beautiful, and you appreciate how beautiful you are. You satisfy yourself. You did everything to be here, and now you're getting Here.
Pretty comes from here.
From now.
I love god, I really do. I rediscover him every day.
Never politicize god. Because god is bigger than getting into these endless wounds.
God is hope. :)
A friend asked me what the worst feeling in the world is. I told her it was regret. Regret is one feeling I didn't experience a lot but I'm pretty sure it's the worst feeling ever for me.
She told me hers was loneliness, another feeling I haven't experienced a lot, because I always found ways out of loneliness. When I was alone, I was happy with it being a choice. I knew how to do things alone, to walk downtown alone, to smoke in a cafe alone. And it was good.
The worst loneliness is loneliness with people being there to actually witness it, and not making it any less.
The opposite would, naturally, be good company. And one you have that, it makes you warm for the whole winter season. Friends that you consider family, a partner that you can always be comfortably silent with. Once you have these, you know you'll survive.
You know you will have lost the energy to do things alone, but you know that you have better company than yourself.
