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InterestingUsername@lemmy.ml to Lemmy ShitpostEnglish · 2 months ago

intruder alert

lemmy.ml

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intruder alert

lemmy.ml

InterestingUsername@lemmy.ml to Lemmy ShitpostEnglish · 2 months ago
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  • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 months ago

    Alexa is the intruder itself.

    • Dyskolos@lemmy.zip
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      2 months ago

      Indeed. Why would anyone use them despite not even getting paid for it but paying for it?

      • Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club
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        2 months ago

        Lmao, I assumed it was free spyware, ppl pay for it too? Ayyyroflufocopter.

        • Dyskolos@lemmy.zip
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          2 months ago

          But hey, it can also switch on your lights and play music. If you also pay for prime :-)

      • boonhet@sopuli.xyz
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        2 months ago

        Home Assistant!

  • BeMoreCareful
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    2 months ago

    Then release a dozen roombas

    • nightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyz
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      2 months ago

      With frickin’ laser beams attached to their heads

      • Spezi@feddit.org
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        2 months ago

        WHERES THE HEAD ON A ROOMBA??? 😳

        • xx3rawr@sh.itjust.works
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          2 months ago

          Opposite the tail

          • Spezi@feddit.org
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            2 months ago

            .

            .

            W̵̧͚͔͖͇̝͕͚̪̝̫̫̼͋͜ͅͅḤ̸̢̡̧͚̖̞̜̟̝͎͎̰̫̪̰̗̳͍̪͙̣͚̤̞̈͑̊̅̐̿̄̉̾͂͋̚͘͝͝Ë̵̺̼͈̭̼̪͕̟̯̖̠̩̝̖́͋̀͋͂̿̇̑̎̑̉́̅͂̾̎͛̚R̵̢̛̬͎̼̮͍̹̭̼̈̐̋̐̋͋͊̒̌͒͘̕͘͝ͅE̷̢̛͓͙̤̺̱͕̯͔͙̫̠̮̘̠̭͙̭͓̗̼͓̼͖̦̙̥̻̟̦͒͆̈́̎͆͐̃͛͒̀̈́͊̋̿̈́̄̃̆͒͐̿̋̓̑́͒͘͘̚̕͜͜͝͠͝͝ͅͅS̷̡̢̨̧̛͔̯̦̺̯̹̠̪̒̈́̉̎͆̔͗̏͂͠ͅ ̷̢͎̙̜̫͚̰̙̙̅́̿̉̿̒̂͊͂̃̋̀̅̒͋͆̔̈̋̈́̔̋͝͠ͅT̴̡̨̢̢̰̘̜͖̯̹͚̜̯̖̖̲̰͍̯̮̲̙̟̰̩̪̱͔̩̺̞͖̫̖̋́̉̿̈́̓͗̍̒̇̆̈́̾͛̎̊̈́́̍̈̂̀͌̋̀̄͊̌̋͗͒̀̕̚͘͜͝͠͝͝Ḧ̸̢͎́̋̌̾͗̑́̓͒̈́̇́̒͂̿̇̆̅̈͊̐̓̄̀̊̚̚͝͝͝͠͝Ę̸̡̲̪͔͎̱͉̯̹͔̜̮̗̤̫̦̞̤͎̗̖́͐̀̄͆̂̀̓̒̿͗͐̈͌͗̏̓̅͜ ̶̡̢̛̟̙̗̩̝̮̤͛̎͒̇͌̏̄̉̀̈́̀̽̔̅̉̚F̷̨̖̰͎̟͎͔͔͓̻͔̤̥͔͒̍̀͊̌̒͂̔̍̐͑̃̄̈́͌̿͊͆̓̆́͜͝Ư̷̧̧̥̘̹̘͖̣̞̹̳̾̎̈̀͜C̷̼͒̈̅̉͑͊̐̌̽̒̀͐̋̚͝K̸̢̧͎̞͍̝͍͎̥̬͓̱͙̦̠͓̜̣̣̜̤̩̫͕̻̟̪̿̔͑̂̈͒̈́͛̈̌̈́̃̓̆͋̄̒̓̔͗̈́̆̄̅̅̃̚̚̚͜Į̴͔͉͉̮͕̗̞̮̼̠͚͍̯̫̼͓̜̠̙̼̺̥̲̦͕͎̱̞̑̓̑̀̒̆͛́͊͗̾̌̇͒͒̀̌̂́͒́̊̉͠ͅŅ̶̡̧̤̰̜̺͔̱̙̤̫͇̼̳̫̤͖͇̪̣͍̘̩̬̞͈͓̘̖̝̲̓͐͂̾̔͂̔ͅͅͅG̸̰̯̠̬̐̎̾̏̂̉́̉͊̅͑͊̍̉͐̈́̎̈̌̍͋͗̑̀̽͊̏̄̈́͘̕͘͘͝ ̷̨̧̹̖̣͉̖͔̩̯͑̾̎̂̊͊́̓̉̑͘͘͝͝͝͝T̸̡̻͓̬̻̜̹̠̭͙̞̩̦̜͇͈̦̖̖̞̫̫̭̱͓̝̭͓̼̯͍̩̝̫͑̽͊͒͑̾͊̓̌͗̚̕̚͜͝͠ͅA̴͙̗̦̱̣̗͕͉͆̈́̚ͅȊ̷̧̧̢̢̧̢̗̱͓̗͈̟̠̩̳͙̹̠̜͎̬̞̯͕͕̺̭̖͈̗͓̺̣͚̖̄͒̆̀̌͜Ḻ̷̨̢̦̦̦͕͇͙͚̙̜͎̙͔̯̺͖͖̳͙̝͔̗̬̯̃̎̋͂͆̒̾̿

            .

            .

            • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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              2 months ago

              Posterior to the head.

      • elephantium
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        2 months ago

        You know, I had one simple request

  • jlow@slrpnk.net
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    2 months ago

    Now redo it in HomeAssistant and with selfhosted music to get rid of the surveillance in your home.

    • Spice Hoarder@lemmy.zip
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      2 months ago

      The intruder was Alexa

  • HikingVet@lemmy.ca
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    2 months ago

    Well, this break and enter has turned into an execution for the mashing of IP.

    The TOS Kirk v. Hostile alien music would be more appropriate. The Borg never threatened to kill, they aren’t Ingo Montoya.

    • lime!@feddit.nu
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      2 months ago

      with jim carreys cable guy version dubbed over top

      • Death__BySnuSnu
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        2 months ago

        Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaahhhhh!!!

    • Rivalarrival@lemmy.today
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      2 months ago

      Dueling Banjos

    • SpaceNoodle
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      2 months ago

      *Bingo Montoya

  • Bytemeister
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    2 months ago

    Fuck that noise.

    You want a fight? You better be blasting Duel of the Fates, otherwise I don’t want any.

  • Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works
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    2 months ago

    You should really consider never using Alexa again.

    Seriously, this is Spyware in your home for Amazon, and they work with and share their data with law enforcement.

  • Postmortal_Pop
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    2 months ago

    I always thought it’d be cool to build one of those remote controled nerf tanks but with a paintball gun. Then set it to patrol the house. It’s a lot more doable now that I’m running home assistant but I’m still not sure how yo make it happen.

    • pipe01@programming.dev
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      2 months ago

      Sounds like something Michael Reeves would make

    • daannii
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      2 months ago

      I believe in your dream and I hope one day you can make this happen.

    • Dhs92@piefed.social
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      2 months ago

      With pepperballs

  • stolig
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    2 months ago

    Also deploy disco ball from ceiling

  • Rivalarrival@lemmy.today
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    2 months ago

    I prefer Ride of the Valkyries to Imperial March.

    Does the floor lamp have a “strobe” mode?

  • ChicoSuave
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    2 months ago

    Imperial March is out of sorts here. The alert the message and then a John Williams march? Get some audio to set the mood, like No Love by Death Grips or Caledonia by Cro-Magnon.

    • CapuccinoCoretto
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      2 months ago

      Yakety sax and have a robot shoot paintballs with gentian violet die. (Doesn’t wash off, if you use enough it will soak through clothes so masks aren’t so useful.)

  • socsa@piefed.social
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    2 months ago

    This is actually a better home protection plan than “have loaded guns in every room in case I need to draw on the baddies stealing my Xbox as they barge into my living room and I dive behind the sofa.” It will scare 9/10 burglars away, and it gives you an opportunity to set up a defensive position without noise giving it away.

  • Agent641
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    2 months ago

    Thisiswherethefunbegins.wav

  • tired_n_bored
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    2 months ago

    My alarm is seriously like that! I put an air raid siren

  • HuePony@lemmy.ml
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    2 months ago

    Red spy in the base?

    • waterproof@sh.itjust.works
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      2 months ago

      What’re you? President of his fan club?

  • Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club
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    2 months ago

    Say “I’m gonna do to you what Janeway should have done to Tuvix at the start of the episode.”

    Play “Pink Fluffy Unicorns Dancing On Rainbows - 12 hour version”

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