Wanting never to have written this post

I sit here with a lump in my throat and tears streaming down my face, not realizing I had any left for this situation until I started typing. It has been over a year and two months since his passing and I still haven't mentioned it on this blog. 

                                         Always looking for something snug to bury himself

I would have to say that it was four or five years ago that Bentley's health started to decline. I had taken him to the pet store to have him bathed and groomed but after we were all done I took him out into the parking lot and set him down so he could go pee on one of the bushes in the parking lot. He was acting like he was drunk. He was walking in circles, then fell onto his side and flopped around on the pavement. I thought FOR SURE he was dying. Foaming at the mouth and stiff as a board I scooped him up, ran back into the store and was screaming as tears ran down my face. "HELP! I think my dog is DYING!" The personnel at the store quickly gathered and had me lay him down on his side and said that he was having a seizure. A WHATZURE? Are you Surezure? My first question (quietly in my own little mind) was, WHAT DID YOU DO IN THERE TO MAKE HIM HAVE A  SEIZURE!!!

So, that is when it started.  The Vet told us that it was due to stress and anxiety.  I guess that runs in the family.  He gave us some Phenobarbital and we were to give it to him every day.  We didn't, but he really wasn't having any more seizures.  The only time he would have one was when he got groomed.  We never went back to the pet store, but tried out a lady out of her home- of which he seized and gave her a tremendous scare.  Then we asked the Vet if they knew of anyone and they actually had a lady in the hospital that did it and they would be able to give him care if they needed to in the event that he had a seizure.

We felt we had it under control.  Not much activity going around and he was even fine while we were remodeling our other home.  It was while I was packing up to move to this house that did it.  It was in the morning.  I had just sent Brendan off to school and let Bentley out for the morning.  After he goes outside he would get in bed with me, burrowing under the covers and sleep until Addison woke up.  That morning he had thirteen major seizures in a row.  Being in my bed it freaked me out.  He would have one that lasted about a 30 seconds and then pant for a few minutes.  Then have another one that lasted about 45 seconds to a minute.  One right after the other.  13 times.  I called the vet the minute they opened and they had me take him right over for observation for the day.  I had told them that I don't know what happened, or what changed that would make him freak out all of a sudden.  Then it dawned on me.  I told them that we were in the middle of a move and that I was tapping up boxes and hurrying as fast as I could because the house was getting done faster than we thought.  The Vet told me that Bentley was feeling nervous about that because he was sensing that we were going to abandon him.  This made total sense.  He told us that we should find a boarding place until not only we were done packing, but completely moved in to our new house.

                                                                Our first born son.

Dave and Debbie have the best next door neighbors.  Liz and Lisa have known Bentley since he was a baby and have taken him in as their own when Jason and I would go on vacations.  Truth be told that he loved it over there and they spoiled him rotten. They called him Big Ben.  They have three other dogs that are bigger than him. So we asked them if they would take him for the next 6-8 weeks so that not only could we pack up the rest of the house- but unpack and make it homey for him in the new house.  They said he was acting not normal.  They said that they had to even take him to the Vet just to be safe.  They gave them more sedation medication to keep him at ease.

We hurried and unpacked the house in an amazing amount of time.  We had furniture arranged in a way that was familiar to him.  He was doing well for the first year we lived here and it just got worse and worse.

The Valium and the Phenobarbital that the Dr. prescribed for his anxiety so many years ago had been damaging his liver.  He was dying of liver failure.  There was really no quality of life.  He couldn't control his bowels and his seizures were getting worse.  The Dr. told us that we could take him home and let him live out his last days, maybe weeks, at home or we could have him humanely put to sleep.  We took him home with us.  We stopped to buy doggie diapers and training pads to put all over the floors.  Watching him for those next two days killed Jason and I.  We decided that we would take him in the next morning available and just let him go.
                                                                 Look at those sad eyes.

When we got there I asked the Dr. if what we were doing was the right thing and he said "Without a doubt, this is what I was hoping you would choose."  He loved Bentley too and didn't want to see him suffer.  We said our last teary goodbyes as the staff got everything ready.  They first gave him a dose of a sedation so his body wouldn't totally freak out.

Dr. Goode, which was his name, came in teary as he got ready to shave Bentley's leg so that he could see a vein.  He got down to his face and said "Mr. B, you've been a wonderful little guy. I'm going to miss you."  And as Jason and I hovered over the table we watched the lethal injection.  Dr. Goode said it would only take about 10 seconds for it to work.  We held on to our baby until his last breath was taken.

We decided to have him buried in our backyard because we didn't want to think of just abandoning him there.  Jason and I were silent the entire ride home.  Jason was holding him wrapped in a blanket.  I would reach over and just pet his body over the blanket.  It was surreal.  Jason had dug the burial spot the night before so we just put him in a nice velvety blue blanket and Jason bent down and laid his body in there.

The kids were doing fine. Sure, they were sad, but we were actually planning on going to a trip to Moab starting that morning.  They helped us and watched as we buried him.  Brendan put in his grave a Cheeto, because that was his most favorite thing in the world. We also put in his favorite bath toy The Frog.  Addison had picked some flowers that she thought would be pretty. 

So Bentley is still with us in spirit.  I know that I will see him on the other side of that Rainbow Bridge.

Another year older

Jason: "I need you to go home.  There was a delivery. They called me and they just left it on the porch."

Me: "Why?  Did the windshield of your Teryx come in?" (He's been adding to the 4wheeler.)

J: "No, I'm not sure, but call me when you get home.

Me:  CLUELESS- even though it's my birthday.

I have the greatest husband in the world. Today he bought me 3 dozen roses. That's how old I am. Three Dozen. 

My porch couldn't have been more beautiful.

Jason bought us a new hobby

About a month ago Jason went, with one of his friends from work, four wheeling up the canyon with Brendan and Travis' son.  He had a four wheeled type vehicle called a Rhino.  They all fit. Jason fell in love. He's been doing A LOT of research on this.  So much so I likened him to my Father, who also researches out things to death.  Not that that's a bad thing.  You go in knowing EXACTLY what you want.   So this morning Jason took me down to pick up what he had bought.  ALL BY HIMSELF!  Look at my husband being so grown up and stuff.  That's usually ALL me handling big purchases with his two cents of information needed.  I guess that's what happens when your now just a Hot Stay at Home Mom and Trophy Wife.

 It really was a fun surprise.  He is having a back seat made with the extended roll bars  That way the whole family can go for a ride up in the mountains.  There are several times we could have used this guy.  This summer if we had him sooner. We had a good time today doing donuts in our backyard.  Because hey- it's still a field.  We've got to make the most of it until we get our yard finished next spring.  Yes, that is Bentley in the back.

 Cutest Yorkie in a Kawasaki Award!

 Addison kept trying to get me to join with them in the back there.

So thanks Hun for the awesome memories we will make with our new off roader!  Weekend mountain trips, here we come!

Lucky Thirteen

Jason and I quietly celebrated our 13th year of marriage over the Memorial Day weekend.  And by quietly, I mean we didn't do anything.

Nothing.

I guess we didn't want to jinx anything.

But that plug I put in for Hawaii last year hit home.  Jason got an extra assignment with the refinery doing an operations audit for the Oahu plant later this summer.  I am sure going to hate going over there. I keep promising not to have any fun while he is working.  I just want to lay on the beach and drink Coke with a little umbrella.  Just not any Cokes from Duke's Restaurant & Barefoot Bar because they are NOT free refills. I guess that's why the Waiter looked at us weird when we kept asking for more. 

I promise to not have any fun while you are at work Jason.  And by that, I mean that I will not tell you that I am having fun.

Love you,
Mandy

Voice Immodulation Syndrome

Jason and I watch Saturday Night Live. We love that show. It is mostly dumb with a few gems thrown in, but when you see that one gem it makes up for all the other lame, vulgar nonsense that is on there. One such tidbit is from Will Farrell. Oh, how I miss him. He truly was the last genius of that show. Well, one of them, anyway. But I digress... In this skit he plays a man who can't control the pitch or volume of his voice.

The reason I bring this video up is because of the fact that a few days ago while Jason was home Addison was in her usual ranting "MOM MOM MOM MOM MOM MOM MOM MOM" and in the middle of it Jason says "I CAN'T CONTROL THE THE TONE OF MY VOICE, MOM MOM MOM".

I literally can't quit thinking of this video now every time Addison is calling for me. She really doesn't have a volume control. She is 100% all of the time. And now, thanks to Jason, I actually laugh about it- instead of going crazy. Thanks babe.

They took down the video I had here with Will Farrell on SNL.  You'll have to search for it on YouTube or Google. Hysterical stuff!

This blog is quickly becoming the spider blog

Jason found this beauty while doing yard work. It was OUTSIDE this time. She is bigger than a quarter and all that fuzz on her back? BABY SPIDERS! Wolf spider mama. If you shake the jar 100's of babies scurry around and then climb back onto her back. Brendan took her for show and tell today. Tomorrow mama has something else coming. Jason is taking her to the lab to freeze her in liquid nitrogen. Just for fun. Please don't tell PETA. At least he won't be wearing a meat lab coat while doing it.

Another year together

Our marriage has now turned 12. I love you so much Jason. Thank you for the life we have. It has truly been one amazing adventure. You told me once that it has been about 5 really good years. We deducted time for college and home remodeling. If a couple can survive a major home renovation, then they can survive anything. Marriage certainly has its ups and downs, but we work it out together. Anyone telling you that they have had a perfect life together is selling something. And that something might be weed. Or at least something we couldn't use, anyway.

Thank you for the beautiful children we have together. Those are some more years that were hard- during all of the infertility treatments and hormones. Five and a half years total, to be exact. Those hormones, I'm sure, are what screwed me up. (Just go with it) I never thought I could love something so deeply than our own children. Thank you for making it so I could stay home and raise them. That is something that I am learning to appreciate more and more every day.

I bring up some rough times to make us appreciate all of the great times that we have together. I love spending time with you. I love that we do everything together like we're old best friends. We have similar interests which people have told me is weird to not have something of my own that I love to do- but I would rather just do it with you. I love that you have several days off of work in a row and that we never get sick of each other. I love traveling with you. I love that I came home late last weekend and we talked for another three hours. I love that you let me be silly and girly. I love that you let me be emotional and crazy. I love you for the wonderful father you are. It is so fun to watch both Brendan and Addison light up when you come in the room.

Most of all, I love the way you love me. You love me unconditionally, and I love you just the same. I hope we have 12 x's 6 -at least- more years together. The best is yet to come- you'll see.

Just remember you're planning the 15th anniversary, and I would like to put my two cents in for Hawaii. We haven't been there in a while. Maybe Tahiti. Okay- we'll wait to see what the world is in three years and plan from there.

All My Love,

Mandy

Dedicated to Randy

My friend and old boss Randy would come in with more stories of falling asleep on his knees than ANYONE I know. So when Jason found this book at his Great-Aunt's house I immediately thought of him. Jason usually says- while falling asleep at church- that he's not asleep, he's just praying. I'm on to him.

Starting a new decade

Well, we did it. We made it to 11 years. Jason and I just had our anniversary. I know that I said that last year, but I hear remodeling and having a new baby adds stress to a marriage. Add having one spouse stop adding income and there is more stress on a marriage. It's a miracle that we are even still talking! What do you do on an anniversary right after you've had a baby? Nothing. Well, you can go get dinner. And then walk around a book store for a little while, but you need to be back before your milk comes in to feed the baby. Where do you vacation on an anniversary after you've just had a baby? No where. For the same reason you can't go anywhere for a long period of time. I am REALLY itching to go somewhere with sand and sun and an ocean. I don't care which ocean. Okay- it has to be somewhere above 80*. That's all I ask- is that too much?? I love you Jason.

D Day

The hospital called to inform me on Monday the 11th that my upcoming C-Section wouldn't be scheduled until 6:00pm on the 12th. WHAT!? AND that I couldn't eat or drink anything for 8 hours prior. Are they trying to kill me? I get so mean and sick to my stomach when I don't eat. I have hypoglycemia and so eating something every few hours is crucial to my natural cheeriness/ assertiveness. (laugh) Now, to tell me that on one of the most important days of my life I have to wait. Sit and wait. Pace back and forth in the house trying to find something to do on the day you are going to be cut open 10 inches.

I woke up and had a big breakfast to hopefully tide me over for the day. I decided to then take a nap and dilly dally the rest of the afternoon before we picked up Brendan from pre-school. We then went to the store to buy Brendan a "Big Brother" present. I stocked up on a few other items and had Brendan pick out a toy for his baby sister. He picked out a really cute stuffed Winnie the Pooh bear. We then got home and I finally packed for my hospital stay and then we dropped Brendan off with Grandpa Neil and went to the hospital. On our way I lean over to Jason and as I comb my fingers through his hair say "I hope she has lots of curly black hair." Then I laughed because Brendan was mostly bald and reddish blond.

This is the Delivery room I was in before I walked into the OR. Yes, I walked. They got me all ready and then when I got into the OR the anesthesiologist gave me my spinal block. I was having so much anxiety. It took the other Dr. 4 tries to get that blasted thing in my back when I was having Brendan. He did it first try. Great!
Here are Dr. Nielson and his resident What's-his-name. I'm getting too numb to care at this point. My nurse was so awesome to take pictures during the whole surgery. I have a picture of my uterus sitting on top of my stomach. Totally awesome. Jason wouldn't take pictures. He wanted to be able to sit back and enjoy the experience without having to worry about the camera. Jerk.

Here is the debut of Addison. When they pulled her out Jason said "Here he is." Because I have been on the fence of whether or not she was really a girl. "It's a boy?" I asked. "No, just kidding, it's a girl." He is still giving me the play by play (as he was the whole time... they are cutting you open- they are cutting the uterus- they are ...) and said "She has a ton of black curly hair!" I said "Shut up. I'm not going for that again." "No, really! I'm not kidding this time."
Jason bringing Addison back into the recovery room to be with us. This is great since with Brendan I didn't get to see him until we went up in my room, which was about an hour and a half! He is in his Ghostbuster's suit from being in the OR. He made me cut off the scrub hat and mask.

Me getting a better look at her for the first time. She makes so many faces while she is sleeping. It's fun to watch.
After we got up into my room my dad brought Brendan to the hospital. Here he is meeting his Baby Sister for the first time.

Brendan loves his baby sister! He is such a good helper.

Me and my babies.

My new family of four. I thought this day would never come. I am so in love with these people!

Getting to know you

I read a blog that never does these Meme questions. However she did it to introduce her husband and give you some insight in their relationship. So, that is what I am going to do. Jason is always saying he should start a counter blog so that he can post "What's really going on - and so I can defend myself." "I could never look anyone in the eyes anymore because they think I'm a jerk!" I said "Oh hun, they don't think you're a jerk. They think you're a lovable weirdo, a jokester who loves to pull one over on most of all people- ME!"

So, here are a few things into the life of us.

What are your middle names?

Jason's middle name is Jason. I don't have one.

How long have you been together?

11 years.

How long did you know each other before you started dating?

We knew of each other through out high school but didn't really hang out. That is mainly because we went to different high schools. It was after he got home from his mission that we caught up with each other.

Who contacted who first?

I had called him just to hang out while all of my best friends were on their missions. I just wanted a non-committal friendship to pass the time away while my girls were coming home. We traveled everywhere together and were planning to when they got back. I was excited to have just a friend to pass time away.

Who asked whom out?

Jason and his best friend meet a couple of girls on New Years Eve and Nate wanted to take one of them out. But, he also wanted Jason to go with him as a double date. As I was standing there 'hanging out' Jas turned to me and said "I don't want to take a date. I'll take Mandy." Yes, our first official date was an obligation to Nate. Hey- I got free food out of it!

How old are each of you?

32 and 32. I am 2 months and 5 days older than Jason.

Whose siblings do you see the most?

I would say that we see them all equally.

Did you go to the same school?

No, I went to WJHS and he went to THS.

Are you from the same home town?

Pretty much. His parents lived one stoplight away from my parents. But they had named the two city's differently.

Who is smarter?

I think that we are both equally intelligent people. Unless you ask me about chemistry or calculus and then I cry uncle!

Who is the most sensitive?

Jason is a very sensitive man. That being said- he still couldn't cry on cue like I can. That takes months of practice. I think I have only seen him cry at one movie. I won't divulge which, but when he shared it with me I started crying! I still haven't seen that movie. If I know I'll cry I can't see it. Million Dollar Baby for example. I saw it and wept for DAYS! Days people! I got blind sided by it and I can never watch it again. Even though it was a really great movie! Oscar worthy, even!

Where do you eat out most as a couple?

The better question is: Where DON'T we eat out as a couple.

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?

Italy

Who has the craziest exes?

That is hard to say. We don't keep in touch with exes, but who's to say that they don't drive by and case the joint every now and again. Jason will claim that I have the craziest. But the two that he would refer to were never actually my boyfriends. But- whatever.

Who has the worst temper?

This is a very good question. We are both ticking time bombs. I, however own the shorter fuse.

Who does the cooking?

Cooking? What's that? Oh- Jason points out that the new kitchen we just got is for this very purpose. RIGHT! I have cooked a lot more in this new kitchen. Jason will conjure up something to eat every now and again which is a nice surprise.

Who is the neat-freak?

Me. I could be a whole lot nicer if Jason would just pick up his damn stuff off the floor and put it in the dirty clothes basket where it belongs. I'm not asking much. Even the therapist agrees with that.

Who is more stubborn?

I had never meat anyone as stubborn as me. Until Jason. The thing about him is that he is silently stubborn which is always worse than someone who is outwardly stubborn. He does it just to get my goat. And it works! EVERY TIME!

Who hogs the bed?

Pre-Pregnancy it was Jason. Now I would have to say that my pillows do most of the hogging.

Who wakes up earlier?

Jason has to be at work at 6am.

Where was your first date?

Remember the Obligation date? It was to Benihana. YUM!

Who is more jealous?

Neither of us are the jealous type.

How long did it take to get serious?

Once again- remember the obligation date? That was pretty much the beginning of the end.

Who eats more?

Jason

Who does the laundry?

Who ever gets tired of wearing dirty underwear first. HA! JK. He is actually more picky about the laundry than I am. So, if he wants it done right I tell him to do it.

Who's better with the computer?

Jason is better at the actual physical computer. I, however, am the Internet Genius.

Who drives when you are together?

I drive. He gets road rage too fast, and I have less anxiety when I drive. It's a win-win.

Anyone feel free to copy these questions for your own blog or website. I hope this gives you a better insight of who Jason is. But of course- he is going to want to counter-blog this.

"I'm seriously moving to Africa."

I haven't written about this conversation yet because I am still totally floored. You hope that you don't have it at least until they are in high school, but 5th grade at the earliest! Brendan busted it out a few weeks ago: "I'm going to go live with someone else!"

Jaw dropping.

Devastating.

Totally hysterical.

I am only going to write about the FIRST HALF of this story. It would be a whole novel if I don't. I will post the next half tomorrow. Or when I get around to it.

I have mentioned before that my son turns into Mr. Hyde while totally tired and delirious, so let me start by explaining the circumstances for the outrage:

Jason lives to bug and torture little kids. He thinks that this is the greatest fun in the whole world. You should see my little niece Katie who is almost 3. She is terrified of Jason. He gives her that little growl that sends her crying to her mom or dad. And he will do it ALL NIGHT. No remorse, just pure satisfaction that he is tormenting this little girl. So, on this particular night with Brendan, we were playing with a few balloons. (If you want cheap entertainment and toys for the kiddos, nothing beats hitting a balloon around the room for 2 hours.) One balloon in the pack had Mickey Mouse on it. This one was his favorite. Bentley LOVES balloons too. He loves to pop them. He loves to attack them and pop them. You can not play with a balloon without Bentley trying to get it. Jason took the MM balloon and started tossing it to the dog. If you drop it down on him from the top he will try to nip it, but it just pushes it back up in the air. I really should take video of it sometime. Brendan kept begging dad to not let Bentley pop his favorite balloon. A few minutes go by- and POP. Tears followed. Strike one, dad.
Now that we have an official bedtime routine, you better darn well follow it. Kids thrive on structure and continuity. (Those are my $5 words for the day.) It was daddy's turn to put him to bed. I do it most nights, but why? I needed a break. Jason had the audacity to ruin his bedtime by ad libbing the words to his books. He may not be able to read, but he knows how the story goes. He was upset. Crying started again. Strike two.
As they were lying down with the Bat Light on, Jason started singing to him. Making up the words again. Usually this is a great and fun past time for the boys. Mostly Jason. But tonight, notsomuch. Strike three. Brendan was absolutely broken at this point. "I'm going to go live with someone else!" He cried.

Jason, completely shocked: "Why?"

B, still sobbing throughout: "Because daddy puts me in time out too many times and I cry! And he's mean to me! I'm taking all of my stuff and- maybe some toys! And I'm going to take Bentley! And I'm going to go get a goldfish! I'm just going to go live with someone else!"

J, antagonistically: "What are you going to do? Hunt for food?"

B: "No, I'm going to the cabin."

J, again: "What are you going to do, hunt for food?"

B: "No, I'll take food. And I'll sleep on the floor in my sleeping bag by the bed upstairs! I'll ask Paul for the keys." (Obviously talking about the cabin they were just at.)

At this point, as I was listening from the other room, I come in. Apparently this isn't ending well- or at all for that matter. If dad was that upsetting then Mama is needed to calm him down. I had let it go on for about 30 minutes. (What? I was interested in what he was saying!) I sat down on the bed and lovingly said "Brendan- we love you so, so much and would be so sad if you went to live with another family. Besides, no one you move in with will be as nice as us. They won't even let you play X-box."

Brendan, after a moment of thought: "I'll take my OWN X-box. And I'll take Nick (cousin) and we'll get all of the guys." (Meaning all of the characters you accumulate on "Lego Star Wars".) More sobbing broke out.

W-he-hel- if you've thought that thoroughly about it.

Putting up the lights

I have to admit this year I have been late getting into the Christmas Spirit. Usually I have the tree up and everything going by the last bite of turkey. This year, notsomuch. I do have to say though, by complaining about my RLS I haven't had it as bad. Maybe I should complain more! HA! No, I'll spare you, but really- it is a little better. I am only getting it at night now. I can't believe how many people actually had it. I never knew it existed and now I have several things to try and help it. I still like the one where Jason rubs my legs every night. Although, he thinks it's all in my head. I had to tell him how many people I knew had it, and he still doesn't believe me. Maybe he'll get it once I kick him in the butt while we're in bed. Hard.

I have begged Jason to help me with the lights every year. Every year he tells me where I can put those lights. He hates doing it, and I have no idea why. What happened in his childhood to make him hate Christmas Lights?? I LOVE putting up the lights. I would help my dad every year to make sure our house looked like the Griswalds... or at least a little like it. Every year I decorate our house because I love doing it. This year -like I said- notsomuch. But now I have Brendan asking why EVERYONE has lights but us. (And he really likes to emphasise everyone.) I was ready to get them out today when I got home from work. But when I pull up to the house and my wondering eyes should appear...

I thought I might cry. I'm not even going to ask him to decorate our big outside tree or anything. I did ask him to get out the Christmas Tree tomorrow. A miracle happened today. And I would like to call it begging.

ALERT THE PRESSES!

Brendan went to bed last night IN HIS VERY OWN BED!!!! This has been a hard work in progress. He usually has to watch a couple of cartoons and then fall asleep in our bed and then we move him in his own room. I don't blame him, my bed is totally more comfortable! Also, when that's what you've been used to, that is what's the norm. I didn't mind it actually, I love cuddling up to him as we fall asleep. I was determined to make his childhood last forever since we weren't having another. However, now that a new baby is on the way, it is going to become a bit crowded. So a few months ago we started bribing him to sleep in his own room. (Sad, I know... but whatever works!) He made up several excuses as to why he couldn't, his most favorite one being that he was afraid of the dark. No Star Wars or Superhero figures would change his mind. Oh, he still wanted those figures, he just didn't want to have to earn them. While we were remodeling Jason cut out a huge Batman sign out of plywood and painted it black. He then attached rope lighting to the back to make it glow from behind as it hangs on the wall. For the final touch we went and bought a remote switch that turns it off and on that we zip tied to Brendan's bed post. Now he has a Bat Signal to fall asleep with so he is not afraid of the dark. And if I can say so myself, it is pretty awesome looking. Jas did a great job on it! This light has been in his room for almost a month. So, did Brendan want to sleep in his super-awesome-bat-cave? No. So, we went to option two. We did this when he was potty training. Although, when it came right down to the wire he would still wind up in our bed. No toy could tempt him into going to bed in his own room. Then on Saturday Jason took him to the store and actually bought a Star Wars toy he likes to call the "Roger, Roger guy". He is a clone droid that always says that. We got the toy home and of course Brendan tried to negotiate on opening it first. After 2 nights of having it sit above his dresser looking him in the eye saying "Brendan, PLEASE open me!" he did it.
Tonight, notsomuch. He's in time out as I type because he wants the best of both worlds. Lord give us strength to carry this through. Good thing I'm already ornery from the hormones!

Here is the awesome sign Jason made.

Here are two more toys waiting for Brendan to want to sleep in his own bed. Can you hear them saying "Brendan, please sleep on your own so mom and dad can have sanity we can play!"?
And on totally separate, but even more exciting news note:

I felt the baby move tonight!!!

I felt Brendan at 14 weeks, and that's where I am now. I have just been anticipating it for the last few weeks and I screamed when that little fish gill flipped against my lower abdomen. I swear I've felt it in the past few weeks, but tonight- without a doubt- it was there. Nausea totally worth it!

Blessing #43: My Husband

I went through all of my old blessings and didn't see one on Jason. How could that be? He is my #1 blessing in the entire universe! On our 10th Anniversary I did a Top Ten Countdown that you can read so I don't repeat myself over and over again about how great he is. In class we were talking with my Laurels in Young Women what to look for in a good potential husband. I told them that the first thing that I fell in love with Jason was his personality and how he made me laugh. He still makes me laugh- almost every day. Unless, of course, he is on one. Then we just leave him be for a while. I love this man more than words can say, and I thank God everyday for having him cross my path (while I was on a date with someone else) ((perhaps the story behind the meeting later)). He truly is my soul mate. I love you Jason!

This was taken at his brother's wedding a year and a half after we got married. We were still so young and no kids. And no mortgage. HA!

Fuller faces and bodies after one kid.

Commandeering the commandeered computer

I know it has been forEVER since I have posted last. Jason has taken over the computer looking at non-important, non-blogging related stuff. How incredibly boring! So I am taking it back. Besides, yesterday for WWFM they were doing "Kitchen Organization Tips" and lets be honest... I just don't have any advise on that- other than ordering a brand new kitchen. Because that is what I did. Couldn't stand the old one, so got a brand spankin new one. My father-in-law asked me a few weeks ago if I was liking my new kitchen layout. LOVE IT! Everything is exactly where it should be. Every time I go to get something it is right where I unconscientiously go for it. Except for the silverware drawer. I have had to get used to that drawer. Everytime I go to get a spoon/fork/knife I reach for the middle drawer. It is actually on the left of that though. Do I change it and undo my bank of utilites? Or just let it be. I am used to it now, and most likely will keep it as is... I am just letting you know of the ONE thing that was kind of off. But is now on. I know I'm OCD, it's just one of the many things Jason fell in love with :)



While I was uploading my picture of the island I found a treasure trove of pictures that Brendan had taken by himself. He is a photographer just like his Mama. He has a poster of Lego Batman on his wall and took a picture of each individual character. He is so funny! Of course none of them are in focus, but they are his treasures and I thought I would share. He took a picture of his bed that he made. He put all of his stuffed animals and his spiderman pillow on it. He also took a picture of the helmut in "It's Place" by his toybox. A knife that he needed to have a picture so he "could knew how long it was." Because it is always life size on camera. And then there were about 100 pictures of his little face making funny faces. I would post all 100, but I'll just keep them to myself.




(I can't figure out why some of my pictures will click bigger, and some won't! It is driving me crazy! Sorry...)

What a man won't do to get out of work

Sunday evening Jason was complaining that he had to go back to work after a 15 day vacation. (we were going to go to France, but then ended up not... long story) I would complain too, he works 12 hour days. He went to bed around 11 so he would be up for his early day. Around 1am he woke up with a really bad pain in his abdomen. He thought it was indigestion and complained about it. Of course I was still up blogging at that time, so I told him to take some Pepto. He whined because he hates it, so after about an hour he went to the store and bought some tablets that he could just swallow. About 10 minutes later he threw up everything that he ate that day. He felt immediately better, but about 10 minutes later he got the pain again. This time it was a sharp stabbing pain right behind his sternum and radiated back to his back. We started searching on the internet for what it could be, he wasn't having any arm pain, and it was in the middle, not the left side of his chest. Still, everything on the pointed to heart attack. So we rushed him to the hospital.

Reason #23 it is good to live close to your parents: Call mom at 3am and have her come over to sleep with son so you can take husband to ER.

The good thing about going into the ER with chest pain is that they not only get you in a room ASAP, but there were 5 men ripping open needles, taking EKG's, doing a chest x-ray... all within a 5 minute period. But then they find out your NOT having a heart attack, so they put the brakes on, go have a latte or whatever they drink behind the nurses station, and pretend that you didn't come in at all. The doctor finally came in after about an hour and told him that everything was okay. Really? Everything is fine? I was hoping it was, because if I were having a serious problem- an hour is just too long! DUH! He asked Jason if he still had his gallbladder. BINGO. That was it. I was sure of it! He gave us some options of going home and trying some acid reflux medine to see if it was just indigestion, or we could have an ultrasound to rule out the gallbladder. We had already been there a few hours, heck what was another one- or two- or three-. So the doctor ordered the test. I was starving! It was now 9:30, and I hadn't been asleep all night and my stomach was growling like crazy! While he went to get his ultrasound I went to the cafeteria to eat something. They have the best food! I wish I could have breakfast there everyday. Good, and inexpensive. I had gotten back and Jason's dad was there. My mom was on her way with Brendan. And we were getting the results back saying that his gallbladder was full of stones and was infected. The only way to fix that is to take it out. The ER doc called one of the General Surgeons and got him on the waiting list for surgery later in the evening. Yes, a whole 6-7 more hours of WAITING. I am just grateful that we didn't have to go home and do it another day. He was in so much pain. He said the only other pain to compare it too would be his kidney stone a few years back. I was awake for 24 hours at this point. I needed some sleep! Mom took me home and I took a 3 hour nap. We hurried back to the hospital but they had already taken Jason, by surprise, earlier than anticipated into surgery. I didn't get to see him before he went in, and now I regret going home to sleep. I know it shouldn't be that big of a deal, but he was there for me every single time, and now- I wasn't there for him. I felt like a terrible wife. We met him back in his room when he got out around 6:30pm. He was hysterically funny coming out of anesthesia. I promised him that I wouldn't write what he said on the internet. So, email me and I'll tell you- JK. I do have pictures of the gallbladder, but I didn't want to gross anyone out. If you want to see it, let me know!
The doctor let him stay overnight, but I went home to get some sleep. I got up today and brought him home. He has been doing really well. He only has a little pain in comparison to what he was in. In fact, last night he was inviting all of the nurses in to party with him. I'm glad I went home.

3 hours of sleep nap in the last 36.

I'll post about Jason's emergency gallbladder surgery tomorrow. Right now, I am going to go to bed early. And by early, I mean before 11pm. And I get to sleep because Jas is still in the hospital and Brendan is over at the in-laws. Oh, please Lord, let me sleep the WHOLE night!

The SECOND first day of school

In the summer I got the information for Brendan's preschool to register for the fall. In that info was the date for the first day of school. When I read it, it said that school would start the end of August on the last Thursday and Friday. Or, at least that's what I SWEAR I thought it said. I was at work on Tuesday and Jason called me up. "Mandy, I just got a call from someone."

Me: "Yeah, who from?"

J: "Brendan's preschool teacher wanting to know where he was for the first day of school."

M: ***CRAP*** "The letter said it started on Thursday!! That's what I told you, right!?"
J: "Yeah, but it didn't make sense. I couldn't figure out why. Brendan was really upset and crying, and I just got him to calm down."

M: "Yeah, well I guess I read the day wrong. SORRY! Too bad I couldn't find it when I went to look."

Dang remodeling! EVERYTHING gets lost! Obviously, I read the form wrong. I claim that my brain left with my placenta. That's my story. Last night at Girls Night Out (which was way fun and much needed) we were talking about how forgetful we became when we got pregnant and then more so after we gave birth. I have not been the same since. One of the girls last night had a hysterectomy a few weeks ago and said that her whole brain must have gone. We think there is a connection.

So, back to today. Brendan was SO excited to go back to preschool. And when I say back, I mean he misses the deadline for Kindergarten so he has another year of preschool. He usually sleeps in until 9:30-10:00 am, (I know, I'm totally lucky!) but today he was up and ready for school by 8. He was ready to go. Except it doesn't start until noon. So, he couldn't understand why we had to wait. He was being so dang funny. "Is it time yet?" So, when we got there he RAN down to the classroom. I had to yell at him to stop so I could take his picture on the first second day of school. Of course he wanted his hair in a Mohawk to impress the girls. Always the ladies man. Just like his dad.

The 8th Wonder and Lame Unions

Well, I have officially melted my brain with the Olympics. I, like the rest of the world, watched with passion Mr. Mikey Phelps win 8 Gold metals. What a terrific feat. Now I can stop watching. I am unimpressed with the way the Chinese have handled everything to do with these games. The fireworks, the cute little girl who wasn't actually cute enough for them, the underage gymnasts... etc... If it weren't for Phelps, and his cute little mom, I probably wouldn't be watching anything. The women's all-around was pretty exciting though... but that was after a swim meet. And what about Bob Costas? He has had a LOT of plastic surgery. Nothing is more evident now that I have an HD tellie. Sometimes I just can't stand that guy. I thought they fired him a long time ago. At least they didn't bring back Hannah Storm. I might have just banned NBC all together. Like I said- now I can get back to more important things like watching HGTV or blogging!

Now to the real issue. Jason is having a problem with his new job. He has to be a part of the Union. There are 3 people that aren't members, and they have them on a blacklist. So, hesitantly he joined. When he got hired they told him that he would need to pass off 3 tests in order to get his first raise. They told him that it took an average of about 6 months to do this. Well, he finished those tests in 3 months. He went to petition for his raise, and the union members who have been there 20 years are putting up a fight because it took them the whole 6 months to get the raise and he shouldn't be able to get it sooner than that. These people have worked their way up from janitor, have been there 20-some odd years and didn't really work their butts off to advance very fast because hey- it's a job. And as long as their part of a union, no one can take that away. So now he has to wait for his raise. He has been in to talk with the Union President to see what they can do. He also wants to start training for more tests... the ones to get an even better raise. They also want him to wait for that too. They don't want Mr. Chemist Degree to come in and start taking over the place. His complaint to the Pres is that he does the same work, so he should get the same pay. Who cares (besides them) if they have been there longer. They should have worked harder too and been there 15 years sooner. I think (in this case) unions make people lazy, complacent, and jerks. Jason came home today with a gift from the refinery. A gold-plated set of coasters. NICE. Maybe if it was REAL we could melt them down and sell it to get some of the money he's owed from his raise 2 months ago!