The stuff they didn’t tell you with your housing packet

Mom and I are at Women’s Conference.  This year we combined all of our intellectual capabilities and determined that we would stay in the one campus dorms.  So he we are at Chipman Hall.  Before claiming two flights of stairs we enjoyed dinner at the Cannon Center.  Lots of veggies…of course with my lap band my first suggestion goes out to BYU.

1. You need a bathroom within running distance of the dinning tables. That or have a lap band defined area with directional arrow to the facilities.

Then we went to the dorm.  We walked around bewildered at the absence of a elevator. With minimal luggage for two women gone for three days. The 2000 lbs was successfully deposited in the room with 1.5 trips from the car, up the stairs and ALL THE WAY down the hall.

2. There are not elevators, make sure to request ground floor housing.

Of course the lack of elevators increase our feelings of entitlement to sample the plethora of deserts at the desert station…not a bar, it is way more wonderful than any desert bar could be.

3. We wish to thank the Women’s Conference Committee for ensuring the absence of calories in all food consumed during Women’s Conference.

The PIG Flu

Recent in the news there had been much talk of a new scary disease has come to the US.  In fact according to the radio there is four cases in Eastern Idaho.  Should we all be afraid?  I mean I got through the mad cow scare unharmed in any way.  In fact I didn’t know anyone other than Oprah was actually affected by the issue (and I don’t even feel that close to Oprah, she never calls and her political views are so weird)

     So last night I had an encounter with the Pig Flu.  This is how it went.  A friend, male, who has recently married propositioned me…and yes that means what you think it means. (He is defiantly one SICK pig of a man)  You know that really really disgusted feeling when you wonder how such a seeming human looking individual could be so inhuman.  He is MARRIED girls, and even if he wasn’t you just don’t proposition women. Your wife maybe, but even then it should not make her feel like she is asked to break every ethical and moral code that she has.

This is how it goes sometimes.

 

At first boys are so cute, sweet, charming you know…

 

 

 

Then some of them start to change upon closer look….suddenly they  are

 

 If you young women are going with a young man who wants to take you to places where you should not go, however appealing, to those dark and noisy places, and there is some move to try to get you to do something you know you should not do, cut it off. Break it up! Send him a letter. Stamp it “Second-Class Male.”

-President Boyd K. Packer, Acting President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, The Instrument of Your Mind and the Foundation of Your Character, February 2003

And if you didn’t get it that way try

Top ten ways my education and professional skills preparing me for being a wife.

10. I am all talked out so only vital conversations are necessary.

9. I am aware of the effects that an environment has on emotional welfare and therefore am committed to active homemaking.

8. I excel at verbal reassurance.  Which means I can make you feel like you are the smartest, funniest, most handsome man in the world with my communication skills.

7. I have studied non-verbal interaction, so I don’t always have to know what you are thinking, and I can communicate all the things in number 8 without saying a word.

6. I have extensive parenting experience…and yet  I have no children.

5. I have excellent control of my emotions (this is compared to other women).  When I do express emotions I can be very specific about what a conversation will require of you.

4. I know the benefits of positive reinforcement and have developed a conscience thought process that is anti-nagging.

3. I am loyal.  Your puppy dog has nothing on me.

2. I am aware that men are capable of relaxing to the state of unconscious thought.  I understand that this means that my husband will need time to relax without being required to interact with others.

1. I have a extensive understanding of the affects of physical touch on human relationships, particularly what and how they communicate.

Elves in the Dining Room

April’s birthday present from my mom is reupholstering her dining room chairs.  Today our project began.  Much like webcams on building site this project will be update with significant changes as they become available.

  

Mom gets very into her work…so much that sometimes her work gets into her.

There were like 200 stapes per cushion..no joke.

Sarah was our supervisor.

If Momma Isn't Happy

This is not about my mother, and since I am not a mother in the most basic sense of the word it is not about me. However, it is about my most recent observations of emotions and the connection that they show through our relationships with others.

Emote, the act of expressing emotions.  Through verbal expressions and cues, body language, or through the spiritual connections that is felt by humans, but often hard to explain we all express our emotions. 

There is a human responsibility in emoting that is not addressed directly enough.  Through the past couple decades emoting is an act of personal expression that people take pride in.  There is a “diva” aspect which is almost unchecked emotions.

Women have been exploited through this process.  The phrase “if momma isn't’ happy, then ain’t nobody happy” is humorous because it true, and not because it is right.  With influences comes responsibility.  This responsibility is something that we should take more seriously.

Lets use our super powers for good my friends.  If we can affect others through our emotions then let us build them up, help them come unto Christ through the spirit, and give support in the way we express our emotions.  Let others be at peace, and even happy because we are examples of those emotions.

What more can I say

Today is my sister’s birthday.  There are so many wonderful things about heather….but let’s be honest the pictures says it all.

Love Love Love you Heather!!!!

You make me laugh, you make me smile, you make me a better woman.

This is how WE do leftovers….

Yesterday Heather threw a Bridal Shower at April’s house for her friend.  SO today for Sunday dinner we had leftovers. 

Here are the girls getting things ready.  We love to cook together.  The kitchen is snug, but we all love each other.

April was talking to Stephanie on the phone.  I miss being close to April’s family, they are always so much fun. 

 

Ethan didn’t want to wait for his plate to be made.  He served himself up some grapes

Ellia takes after Aunt Jen with her Dinner entertainment.

Sarah is so very very adorable…and adds a smile to every family event.

 

You are kind of smiling aren’t you.

Jump for Joy

How do you define joy?

Trampolines add a little something to the day. I love watching the kids perform for us.  Here are some action shots.

View Full Album

Maybe, Maybe Not

10. Your friends think you are dating, his don’t

9. He hugs you for extended periods of time, but has never kissed you (there might or might not have been an attempt).

8. He holds hands with you when no one is around.

7. He leans…

6. You deny it when you friend name the 10 reasons they know he likes you. (but you smile)

5. He always sits next to you.

4. He calls to tell you about his significant experiences.

3. He knows your favorite dessert, but you never go out to restaurants.

2. When he describes his perfect women he names all the same things as when he tells you what he likes about you.

1. He calls at intermittent times to plan activities that are only two of the three following

Planned Ahead

Paired Off

Paid For

Seriously Men…time to commit, because to many woman have spent to many hours trying to figure out what you are doing, why you are doing it, and if it means what all of our friends think it means.

8th Grade all over again

So during my eighth grade graduation my nylons came off unexpectedly. They were to big and started to fall south during the walk to my seat on the football field. I kept my hand at my waist trying to delay the inevitable. Finally while at my seat I shimmied out of my nylons...which was not hard as they were already at my knees.

Today as I was walking away from a meeting the same thing happened. By the time I got to my car my tights were at my knees.

Seriously people...loosing weight is not always fun.

It is all part of the AMAZING plan

One of the things that I LOVE about Conference is that it is a time when the Spirit of the Lord whispers to our hearts the things we needs.   For many people I know it becomes the time when significant decisions are made because of the thoughts, feelings, and impressions that connect to the Light of Christ in each of us.

During this most recent conference I feel that it was time that I take the next step in my life.  It is because I felt it resonate with my spirit that I feel no fear in moving forward.  I feel no fear that the path will open. 

It is not often that I can say that I have complete faith, but when the direction comes in a clear way that my spirit can recognize then complete faith seems easy.  It is more than easy.  It is confidence in the knowledge that I am on my Father’s errand.  It is a knowledge that when the Lord wants something accomplished then it will be accomplished. 

During the last week  I have studied Nephi as a young prophet.  I find that his testimony is what sets him apart.  He actively seeks to draw close to the Lord.  He moves forward, seeks testimony and is able to do more with the support of the Lord. He is ready for his next errand from the Lord.  He is sure of his success.

On this wonderful Easter Sunday, I want to thank my Father for the gifts of the spirit.  I know they are how the Lord works through us to accomplish his purpose.

Age is only a Number!

Today is my sister April’s Birthday.  She is an amazing woman.

April not only believes that family is the most important things, she lives her life that way.  April has brought a life to a the Hays Family Party.  She is one of us in every sense of the word.  She makes us better, helps us laugh at ourselves, and give of her self.

 

April I have a deep love and gratitude for you.  I am especially grateful that you have moved close and we have the opportunity to spend more time together.  Your testimony of family raises the bar for all of us, and we are grateful for the love you continue to bring to our lives.  As a Wife, Mother, Daughter, Sister, Aunt, and Woman you amaze me.

Faith of little children

Who knew! I mean seriously so many adults have stressed and prayed over this issue for years. Of course we couldn't figure it out. I mean we weren't ready. First my brother had to grow up and get married. Then they had to wait to have children. Then we had to wait for Brooklyn to grown up and develop a cognitive thought process that would allow her to explain it all to me.

For months now Brooklyn has been asking when I am going to start having children. I mean come on...I am her ONLY aunt that doesn't have children, so she knows that it is my turn. (Hint Hint, Nudge, Nudge) Ellia has asked as well. Sammy chimes in every now and then. Jarom has asked before. Ben hasn't asked forever. Caleb Michael is still looking at me kind of weird. The rest think I am their personal jungle gym, so they are pretty satisfied for now.

Tonight April, Sarah, and Brooklyn came to see me. It is kind of nice that my family visits my little apartment. Brooklyn colored a picture, then she wanted me to put some string on some beads to make some jewelry (this is something that all her aunts have in common). Then we played a little game. As she was putting on her jacket she looked at me once again and asked, "Aunt Jen, when are you going to have kids". I reminded her that, "first Aunt Jen has to get married in the....". "Temple" Brooklyn finishes.

I then quickly explain that I have to find a husband first. Well this is easy Brooklyn decides. "Come over to my house and I will show you your husband Aunt Jen."

Well Brookie, I am there. See you tomorrow!

What's in your shopping cart?

I hate to ruin it but this is not a dating story.

I used to think there was no point to shopping at club membership super stores. I mean what single person needs 48 hotdog...I mean unless you are having a BBQ.

But this month I learned that for the lap band improved crowd (that's me) there are only a few things that I eat. So this month I went to Sammy's to go grocery shopping. Here is what came home with me

48 Gogurts
2 Bags of frozen fruit
2 Bags of tortilla chips
30 high protein meal shakes
48 mini bags of popcorn
24 Fiber bars
24 Mexican egg roles
8 Soy bean packages
48 cheese sticks

Food I know I can eat without throwing up being in the house all month...priceless.

The missing mailbox!!!!

You know the saying you don't know what you have till it is gone. Well today I stopped by my office to check my mailbox. It was gone. Over the last couple weeks they have been rearranging our workspace, and the mailboxes are the most recent focus of the office staff.

Last week they has changed the mailboxes and arranged them by last name...however since most of us only go in the office once a week, they thirty degree holding adults that share my office complained. The office staff went to work to rearrange the boxes yet again.

Today I went to look for my box..it is alphabetical, so it should be that hard. However it went from Jana to Jill...I probably rechecked four times. Then I looked at other places thinking that maybe they moved me because they forgot at the last minute. Hey they are only human. Still no box.

My heart sank! They the panic set in. Why wouldn't they give me a mailbox. I of course first evaluate my recent performance at work. I determined that there was no reason to worry, but still I wrote an email to the office manager.

I didn't know how much my work mailbox meant till today.

Testimony of promises

My heart is full as I consider the blessings of my life. I have so many blessings in my life that show the love that the Lord has for me. I am truly loved of the Lord, and it shown in the care He takes in my life. I know the blessings that I desire most in life, that of a companion and family are arranged in the Lord's time.

He has promised, and He keeps his promises. The natural woman in me seeks to attract a spouse to fulfill this need. The world pulls on me to be exposing in my dress and manner, as to make men comfortable in their pursuit of me.

This pull from the world is strong as I get older. In my weak moments I questions the choices I have made over time. The choice to put the Lord first. To serve others, to consecrate my talents, to temper my natural and physical portions. To wait upon the Lord for the kind of man who can lead my family and guide our family to the Celestial Kingdom. To withstand the criticism from the great and spacious building.

Still it in the pull, the criticism, and exercion of faith that allows me to know that I am on the path. The darkness surrounds the right way. It is only in walking through the darkest of moments, hours and days of our life that we build a testimony. This testimony has cost me the immediate gratification that so many arround me enjoy. It is the tesitmony that allows me to claim the blessings of dicipleship.

Why aren't you married?

So I have to say that because I mostly hang out with the family and single friends I don't get this questions so often that is causes me to have some kind of violent reaction, but it comes up. The truth is I am not more any more broken than any other married person I know, in fact many are way more screwed up than I am.

So here is the top ten non reasons I am not married...
10. I am not too picky, I only want what I want.
9. I am not looking to be a career woman. But I have a career I am ready to retire from ;)
8. I am not afraid to leave my parents for a spouse, but I have some family members who are afraid I will move away.
7. I am not scared of commitment. But I am learning to be afraid of people who are afraid of commitment.
6. I am not boring, if I wasn't funny would you be my friend?
5. I am not afraid of affection...quite the contrary!
4. I am not waiting to finish my school, some nights I pray that I will get married so I don't have to finish the current paper.
3. I am not threatened by a man who is in charge...I have been heard to say that I really want someone who can take control.
2. I am not unattractive, I haven't' had a really bad hair in several months.
1. I am not lacking for amazing male friends who are defiantly someone I can see my self married. (see number seven for why I don't marry them)