Abigail Nan Jones.....

Oh how I love you! Happy Birthday!

2004

2005

200620072007

2008

2009

a little note to my friends and family....

Dear Friends and Family,

I love to read the newspaper, since I have given up books (yes I have gone since the January 1st without opening a book) I have taken up the paper. Oh and I love the paper. Not because I am trying to be more aware of my community, not because I'm trying to figure out the economy, not to be on top of the most recent political scandal, and not for the funnies. The sole reason I read the paper is for the obituaries. Yup, love to read about dead people. Now here is the important part.....please take note....
hu---huummmm....
1. Please DO NOT ask for donations to help pay for funeral costs...I don't care if you have to bury me in a pine box. Please see #6.
2. Please don't use a horrible out of focus picture of me.
3. Please don't list my divorces (even though I will never have one) like this...she was married to so and so, they later divorced. She then married so and so...they later divorced. She then married so and so, they later divorced. She then decided she was not good with men and focused on herself.
4. Please don't write a poem about tears running down your face or angels welcoming me into heaven with open arms...as far as you know I'll be in the celestial but in reality I'll probably be partying it up with the telestial folks.
5. Please don't list my church callings...how sweet but I don't want to be defined by what I so begrudgingly took. (okay maybe I shouldn't have written that one in case anyone in my ward is reading this, but seriously, does anyone LOVE to do their church callings? I don't mind them I just don't want to be defined by them. And I only put begrudgingly because it makes me sound like I know big words).
6. I wish to be flushed....yes, cremate me and flush me down the toilet...how fitting if you think about it...I spend my life in the bathroom, my body failed me in that aspect and I wish to show it what it showed me.
7. Please list why I died and how long I suffered. Don't leave it up to others imagination. If I died of liver failure, say it like it is.
8. Please use correct English and spell check before you send.
9. Do NOT by any means put a nick-name above my picture such as "sweetie-pie-pants" or any other ridiculous sounding name. I wish for people to take my death seriously.
10. And lastly, don't sugar coat my life....if you think I was cruel and unusual don't say that I was an angel walking around with invisible wings.

With these simple instructions things should be easy enough for you...you'll know how I feel if within a week of the funeral things start going bump in the night....
J

Lies Lies Lies.....

In the early to mid 90's while I was taking a child development class at Weber State I vaguely remember a bit about lies. I wish I would've paid a little more attention to the professor and what it means when your sweet boy starts telling them every time his mouth opens.

First lie (I really shouldn't number them because I have lost track of ALL of them, I'm only going to tell you two that stand out most in my mind)....

Me picking Garrett up from pre-school

Me: hey gil, how was your day?

Garrett: not so good, I got shot in the forehead with a BB gun.

Me: huh?

Garrett: poko (or Parker) brought his gun to school today and shot me in the head.

Obvious LIE Garrett.

Lie #2: again, me picking up Garrett from school...

Me: hey chooch, how was your day?

Garrett: Not so good, Hugson (Hudson) got really mad and then Miss Evelyn gave him a white slip and he can never come back to school.

(a white slip is something the ELEMENTARY uses when a student gets in big trouble)

Me: What? Hugson can't come back? Ever? Why did he get mad?

Garrett: He got mad cause I'm so fast and I won the race.

Obvious LIE bud. We were right in the middle of a snowstorm and common sense says that races are NOT ran in snowstorms!

okay I checked with his teacher and Hudson did not get in trouble for getting mad. The kid didn't even GET mad.

And now we have Sundays incident:

Yes, that is Garrett coloring his lips with marker

And this is his reaction when I told him "NO" he couldn't stay home from church, I knew he wasn't telling the truth about being sooooo sick that his lips turned red.

I'm thinking about purchasing a lie detector

Em and her love of dogs....

Pull out your high powered glasses......here is a picture of Em's dog bite....yes, it is there, its small but if your glasses are strong enough you'll be able to see it....Pretty much everyone knows the story but if you haven't here it is...

We have some neighbors who are the MOST responsible dog owners that I know, and yes, I was somewhat raised with animal lovers so I know lots of dog owners. Well Em was outside when she saw this dog she loved and she bent down to give him a hug and he sort of nipped her cheek. No flesh hanging from from tendons or anything like that. The best part of the story is she flies into the house and locks herself in the bathroom with our wiener dog and here is what I hear from the other side of the door...

Em:"mmmaaaaaaagggggiiiieeee!"

ME: Em what happened? come out, I need to see what happened!

Em: "NO! I need to be with Maggie!"

and she proceeds to stay in the locked bathroom for 20 minutes while I coax her out and hear the story from the other side of the door.

Glad to know that a mothers love can be replaced with a stupid wiener dog. And I mean stupid.

Needless to say, all is well, her stitches (all 3) are out and she LOVED having whiskers like her favorite horse Ace.

Lesson I learned? My love and caring of this child since she was pushed from my loins means nothing to her as long as a pooping in the basement whenever possible wiener dog is around.

I know, I know, time to update.

I'm working on it, I have a great post involving lies, dogs, and stitches but I need to find my camera.......

Horse Lesons ToDAY

So I know I've posted about lessons and how much the girls love them (especially Em) but they wanted me to post them in their latest lesson for all to see.....

The shocker of all shockers is when we got to lessons and Em's Nito was in the arena. Unfortunately he isn't her lesson horse but she still loves him...

Here they are getting their trotting down...(yeah I've already mastered this one, the trots)

Mr. Competition goes to his first meet......

Lately I've noticed how competitive Garrett is getting, he always has to be the first, tallest, fastest. Maybe its a "boy" thing because I've never seen this with my girls and since I was raised with all girls this is new (yes John, ALL girls). So when he was getting restless not being able to go outside and play I signed him up for gymnastics. He looks a little nervous here but he pulled it all off....and got a ribbon which he thinks is soooo cool. The competitiveness is still there and I'm sure with boyhood it will be there for a while but I'm okay with that as long as I can use some of it to my leverage...like when he wants to drink my Mt. Dew and I tell him that it stunts his growth so he stays away from it.