Do we have to go to war with all of Africa to learn where its countries are?

Piss off. Happy almost birthday to your mom if she’s real.

If Poland decides to roll up on Russia with their shiny new tanks (properly supported by crunchies and assorted air assets) without pushing the Article 5 button, gonna have to see if they’ve got a foreign legion. I don’t know Polish unless we’re talking about making boots shiny so that could be a challenge but not an insurmountable one.

Youtube doesn’t have ads if you block them.

Insurance won’t even cover the cost of lube for the gargantuan ass-fucking we’re doing to ourselves.

NATO territory under attack? Let’s do this already.

Should have made it a sparkling water bottle and called it Katy Perrier.

Might be all right with a soft pretzel fresh out of the oven.

Twist the flush handle like it’s the throttle on a motorcycle and pretend the sound of rushing water is the growl of your bike’s engine.

They handled a case for a friend of mine whose human pretended to throw a ball but really just tucked it behind their back. Dog was searching for hours or approximately 35 seconds (depending on which party you ask) before looking back to see the human holding it again. Absolutely crushed the dog’s sense of trust. Can’t get into the specifics of the settlement they reached but let’s just say that client will be getting bellyrubs and rhetorical questions about who the good dog is for the rest of their life.

Free pony on signup.

Israeli’s: possessive.
Israelis: plural.
Israelis’: plural possessive.

No.

A second Trump presidency has hit the reality. America is under attack.

Let me get back to you on that in a few months.

If he keeps doing what he’s doing, we’ll end up using it as toilet paper or burning it for warmth.

Fighting for an imaginary right to creep and bare arse.

Nothing like a cool floor on a hot day.

Does robot dick still get you stoned?

Who owes you a response? Why?