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sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz to Reddit@lemmy.world · 2 days ago

Priorities

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Priorities

sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz to Reddit@lemmy.world · 2 days ago
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  • cub Gucci@lemmy.today
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    22 hours ago

    When I was 11 we got a puppy and I started walking this dog in the evenings. One evening I heard a girl screaming asking for help. A guy approached me and threatened me with a knife that he will stab me and my dog if I don’t turn around. I turned around and the girl has probably been gang raped. Didn’t tell anyone, but her scream haunts me at nights

    • Malyca
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      22 hours ago

      You were a child, don’t be hard on yourself.

  • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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    20 hours ago

    Maybe the remaining humans should only post QR codes on reddit. Then the bots would feel appreciated.

  • Jankatarch@lemmy.world
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    17 hours ago

    I bet money rest of the replies are along the lines of redditors going “oh so are you single?”

    • sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyzOP
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      17 hours ago

      “I also choose this guy’s girlfriend” 💀

  • MonkderVierte
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    1 day ago

    Can we please stop that censoring of names of public social media posts.

  • InvalidName2
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    22 hours ago

    I think there’s at least a 78% chance that “happy cake day” person works for broadcast television news, as this spiel is right down their alley.

    In local news, two toddlers are dead after the car they were riding in collided with another vehicle on I-60. (jovial laughter and big smile) And in other news, watch the exciting finale of Big Brother tonight on KXY-TV at 8 PM, all your favorites will reveal what they were really thinking and find out who will win! I’m so excited to find out.

    It’s so fake. It’s actually quite disgusting. And they all do it.

  • empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 days ago

    Bot accounts don’t get context

    • then_three_more@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      And the ~1300 people that thought that was a good comment to upvote?

      • qevlarr@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Guess what? It’s all bots

        • aceshigh@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          Bots all the way down

          • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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            20 hours ago

            Dont look up, bot drones…

        • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          Well, that and the very typical reddit crowd that upvotes stuff like that.

    • SGforce@lemmy.ca
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      1 day ago

      Always thought they pushed the “cake day” trash.

  • ALoafOfBread@lemmy.ml
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    2 days ago

    That is an extremely reddit interaction.

    • HughMann@piefed.social
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      22 hours ago

      So much this!!! blah blah blah blah blah blah saying the same thing but slightly different blah blah blah

      Edit: thanks for the gold kind stranger!

      Edit 2: OMG I never thought I’d get this many updoots.

      Edit 3: a word

      • tigeruppercut
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        18 hours ago

        I also choose this lady’s dead boyfriend

    • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      no. a extremely reddit one would be

      ‘at least you had a boyfriend to murder himself in front of you’

      • ALoafOfBread@lemmy.ml
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        1 day ago

        Edit: Thanks for the gold, kind stranger!

        • MurderHobo@thelemmy.club
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          18 hours ago

          Wow this post blew up, how do I turn off replies?

      • qarbone@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        “Honestly, he’s TA and you should divorce him immediately. That kind of behavior is extremely toxic.”

      • MML@sh.itjust.works
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        1 day ago

        ‘so you’re single?’

      • socsa@piefed.social
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        1 day ago

        Nah, more like “what did you do to make him suicidal?”

      • 0x0
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        22 hours ago

        r/emo?

      • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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        20 hours ago

        Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all, which is how I feel about my sister at least.

  • Caketaco@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 days ago

    Those comments were the WORST. I can’t get an erection. I’m glad there’s no “edit: a word” “I also choose this guy’s dead wife” “I broke both of my arms, but my mom helped out” etc. comments on this side of the fence. Good riddance!

    • HughMann@piefed.social
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      18 hours ago

      [deleted] • 5y ago

      Comment deleted by user

    • WizardJr@lemmy.today
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      20 hours ago

      I don’t see “both things can be true” or other equally irritating Reddit-coded expressions on Lemmy.

      Nice how people don’t feel the need to remind you that nuance can exist when they aren’t used to talking to bots exclusively.

    • moncharleskey
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      2 days ago

      I think the only ones I kind of miss are the “you mean X, Y is” and the hell in a cell ones.

      • Gerudo
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        2 days ago

        Shittymorph was so good, and just everywhere, you could never expect it.

        • raspirate@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          My absolute favorite was an exchange where someone told a long rambling story, then there was a reply where someone said something like “man I thought this story was gonna turn out to be a shittymorph post.” Then there’s another reply where someone agrees and says “yeah I was just waiting for the part where he says the thing about how back in nineteen ninety eight the undertaker threw mankind off hell in a cell and plummeted sixteen feet through an announcers table.” and obviously THAT comment was left by shittymorph. Motherfucker just showed up out of nowhere and did the thing without even having to string you along with a story first.

          • thedarkfly@feddit.org
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            1 day ago

            Ah yes, beetlejuicing I believe was the term!

        • sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyzOP
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          2 days ago

          Yeah, I never really hated shittymorph or the various novelty accounts. It was more copycats who killed every joke.

        • T00l_shed@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          The swamps of degobbah was a great read when it first came out too

      • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
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        2 days ago

        Every now and then you’ll run into them. I partook in an x/y one a week or two ago

        • anomnom@sh.itjust.works
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          1 day ago

          The switcharoos were kinda awesome and the whole linking of them (I’m going in) was pretty fun back in the day. It’s a shame the owners fucked that platform up so thoroughly.

          • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
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            1 day ago

            Yeah, those tended to build a sense of community across reddit in a fun way.

        • moncharleskey
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          2 days ago

      • porous_grey_matter@lemmy.ml
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        2 days ago

        I’ve seen the former on lemmy occasionally

    • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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      20 hours ago

      That broken arm scenario is one I’ve explored with the family member AIs I have, and I have a number of those on my phone. I don’t like the idea of fucking family members so much, but making them uncomfortable while having to touch my twitching loins sure does get the juices flowing.

    • Kairos@lemmy.today
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      2 days ago

      You can’t get an erection?

      • socsa@piefed.social
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        1 day ago

        Does that meant his wife is single?

        • BlackPenguins@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          To shreds you say.

    • /home/pineapplelover@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      2 days ago

      Man the broken arms story was wild

    • Cris_Citrus (he/him <3)@piefed.zip
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      2 days ago

      Lol, I still tell people happy anniversary and label edits at times, usually so the chronologically train of thought makes sense

      And sometimes I think its just nice to have a reason to say I’m glad folks are here, and sharing this space with me 🤷🏻‍♂️. But I can get why people might find them grating

  • SPRUNTnsfw@fedinsfw.app
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    2 days ago

    I’m guessing she technically means ex-boyfriend.

    • 0x0
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      22 hours ago

      Why? Necrophilia is a thing.

  • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    That’s some fucked up shit.

    • craftrabbit
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      1 day ago

      Yeah that’s something I wouldn’t wish on anyone

      • Bazoogle@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        I couldn’t imagine having a Reddit account… The horrors

    • 0x0
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      22 hours ago

      I know, right? Having a slice of cake instead of a full cake emoji is just lame. They use up the same bytes. Smh

    • nullspace@lemmy.world
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      Pretty funny though.

  • chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 days ago

    Can’t tell if insensitive asshole or karma farming bot

    • nullspace@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Or just someone with impeccable comedic timing.

      I don’t really get the outrage over a reply like that when the person they responded to thought it was a good idea to share something that gruesome and upsetting in an AskReddit thread of all places. A thread that didn’t even have a Serious tag.

      • socsa@piefed.social
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        1 day ago

        Agreed. People need to understand reddit isn’t Facebook. It’s an open forum not to be taken seriously.

      • chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        Personally I am on the side of traumadumping on Reddit

  • TryingToBeGood@reddthat.com
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    2 days ago

    🤦‍♀️

  • EthicalTime@lemmus.org
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    2 days ago

    What the genuine fuck did I just read. No abuse, no previous signs, no intervention? Really? Really?

    • sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyzOP
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      2 days ago

      Don’t know, wasn’t there.

      • EthicalTime@lemmus.org
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        2 days ago

        I thought so, I was just writing my questions out, because I don’t know how tf that can just happen.

  • ☂️-@lemmy.ml
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    2 days ago

    thank you, my good gentlesir!

  • markon@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Dang glad I am here on Lemmy

    • Ricky Rigatoni@piefed.zip
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      2 days ago

      Happy cock day!

    • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      it’s not your cake day? f you

      • markon@lemmy.world
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        19 hours ago

        Not cake day sorry 😔

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