1,314 blog-posts in four years,…

I decided to move on to a new blog.

Year 2010 is the start of the exploration of my strength. What I am good at. Have written in English four years, in line with this year’s spirit, I feel this is my time to explore my own language. I may not excel at Indonesian either. But, I must have more strength in using my mother language so I would like to find out.

Been writing 20 blog-posts in Indonesian since the start of the year, I am ready to start a new blog about my days since I live in Ubud called
Sejak di Ubud…

The new theme, in line with the spirit of the Year of the Tiger.

Kelihatannya lebih enak tinggal di rumah…

Tiba-tiba aku mendapatkan ide untuk tidak bepergian di malam Tahun Baru kali ini. Sesudah tidak hujan berhari-hari, kecuali kadang-kadang di malam hari, hari ini hujan turun cukup deras sejak sore. Begitu derasnya sampai aku tidak bisa membayangkan aku menyetir di malam hari, keluar-masuk mobil dengan mengenakan pakaian malam Tahun Baru yang tentunya istimewa. Aku menimbang lagi beberapa usulan teman melewatkan malam Tahun Baru bersama. Satu teman akan melewatkannya di sebuah hotel butik dekat toko kami yang tiketnya tidak murah tetapi aku merasa mungkin akan lebih menyenangkan kalau lebih banyak teman pergi ke tempat yang sama. Pilihan yang lain adalah santap malam istimewa di sebuah restoran di dekat rumah diiringi musik hidup untuk berdansa.

Apapun, sesudah berhari-hari melewatkan liburan di rumah paling tidak setengah hari di pagi hari sampai siang, rasanya tidak ada semangat untuk melewatkan waktu di tempat yang ‘sudah tidak asing lagi’ di kota kecil seperti Ubud ini. Sekarang aku mengerti kenapa banyak orang dan aku sendiri suka merencanakan melewatkan malam Tahun Baru di tempat yang ‘baru,’ tempat yang tidak biasa dikunjungi di hari lain, sehingga momen istimewa ini bisa semakin istimewa. Seorang teman baik di Denpasar memutuskan untuk tinggal di rumah membaca buku silat yang baru dia beli. Kelihatannya itu ide yang baik terutama sesudah ada desas-desus mengenai adanya kemungkinan bom meledak di Bali malam ini.

Akhirnya datang juga saat untuk mengubah tampilan blog yang sering aku lakukan setiap pergantian tahun. Perubahan, terutama yang berarti, selalu memberi nuansa yang berbeda di hari selanjutnya. Aku memilih warna oranye-kuning untuk tahun 2010 karena ini adalah Tahun Harimau Metal. Sering aku membiarkan diriku terjebak pada hal-hal yang sama yang selalu aku lakukan seperti memilih warna alam atau monokromatik untuk kebanyakan karya seniku tetapi di tahun mendatang ini aku bertekad untuk keluar dari kotak kebiasaanku. Aku ingin pembaruan yang membawa semangat baru.

Sudah empat tahun aku menulis di blog ini hampir setiap hari. Tahun ini jumlah pos mengalami penurunan yang cukup berarti, hampir 16%, dari tahun sebelumnya yang juga sudah turun 9,4% dari tahun sebelumnya lagi. Mudah-mudahan tahun ini jumlah pos tidak menurun lagi hanya karena aku kembali belajar memakai bahasaku sendiri. Aku bertekad memurnikan semua aspek kehidupan yang aku mulai dari pemakaian bahasa. Karena keharusan memakai berbagai bahasa dalam keseharian, aku bertekad untuk tidak mencampur bahasa yang aku pakai. Aku mulai memperhatikan bahasa yang dipakai teman-teman literaturku yang pandai dan kreatif mengkaryakan kosa kata yang kita miliki yang ragamnya kurang luas dibandingkan bahasa lain seperti bahasa daerah. Aku dan temanku yang penterjemah banyak tertawa tadi siang waktu kami mencoba menemukan kata yang cocok untuk menggambarkan ‘membawa barang diatas kepala.’ Dijunjung? Lalu bagaimana memberi imbuhan awal dan akhir yang baik dan benar sehingga tidak menimbulkan tafsiran yang kurang tepat. Semua bahasa membawa tantangannya sendiri dalam pemakaian lisan dan tulis.

Aku juga merencanakan untuk memberi rumah tinggalku nuansa baru yang lebih kontemporer. Selama ini aku mengkombinasi gaya klasik dan mutakhir untuk hiasan-hiasan di rumah. Ini akan menjadi proyek berjalanku tahun ini. Aku juga harus segera ‘masuk’ ke Pallava untuk memilah barang apa yang ingin aku simpan untuk aku pakai sendiri dan barang apa yang bisa aku lepas pada harga dasar atau lebih rendah untuk menyederhanakan tatanan peraga dan gudang. Ini bukan rencana baru tetapi aku harus mengatakannya lagi untuk memberi nuansa baru semangatnya. Seringkali waktu melenakan aku dari berpikir lebih rinci di kedua tempat usahaku namun kelihatannya tahun mendatang ini aku ‘dipaksa’ untuk segera memutuskan sesuatu. Waktu terus berlari…

Malam yang istimewa untuk semangat yang istimewa. Hidup semangat baru! begitu bunyi pesan singkat yang dikirim padaku oleh bekas anak asuh Mama. Aku sepaham dengannya.

Pohon Natal terbuat dari daun palem kering di galeri yang aku kunjungi kemarin.

How do you do your time?

A friend asked another friend over dinner. It’s interesting because I also observed the way I do my time. Like many these days, we spend quite a lot of time in computer. Not just for online stuff but I’m brushing up on my Photoshop skill these days. It has become a new challenge for me to explore different kind of creativity. So that’s what I do these days spending half day in computer while multitask doing household chores that I cannot drop even in holiday season. I don’t mind.

Being in cocoon so long, I also have the urge to go out to meet people, to see happenings. My friend and I attended an art exhibition opening in a well-known gallery in Ubud last night. The gallery is clever as they often had new exhibition in the end of the year. It’s refreshing! So the artworks displayed last night. Paintings with (bule) cow as main theme and metal sculptures in the form of dog. Both artists are Balinese but have been living in Yogya over eight years for study and work now. Interesting, they even have adopted Yogya accent very well.

I don’t usually start a conversation but looking at shy artists I was interested to just approach them and have a chat. So I had one-on-one chat with each one. The painter who paints cow was concerned about cows killing to produce our food. What a special concern? He explained how he got the idea well. And the dog sculpture artist got the idea after he lost his dog in Yogya – a city where keeping a dog is not easy because dogs are worth stolen. Also, because he is familiar with dog’s behavior so he feels comfortable to create art with dog poses. Yes, the dog sculptures looked really good especially as an installation. It needs an atmosphere to display, the artist explained further why he doesn’t sell his work individually but set of three or six.

I was considering to leave the gallery although the owner invited my friend and me to have dinner in the restaurant of their beautiful boutique resort in the back of the art gallery. Good my friend, the exhibition curator, caught and led me to the restaurant so I didn’t have space to escape back to my preferred cocoon. I enjoyed every bit of chat in the end. We shared table with the curator and a well-known French jeweler lives in Ubud. I call him the Tiffany of Ubud for the price. For the work, he is beyond.

It’s a nice way to spend an end of a year. Spending time with self and but also with other inspiring individuals.

Today is the last day of 2009. I didn’t sleep well last night just because of so many new ideas for starting the 2010! The year has not even started but I’m already bubbling. I’m happy!

The metal dog.

I hold the world record of having Ganeshas!

Of acquiring, I guess. My friend was surprised to see how many Ganeshas he has acquired the past days in Ubud. Ganesha has just come to him this visit. For me, I have been years in like with Ganesha. For the exotic shape, when I lived in Jakarta. Later in Ubud, I learned more about the ‘spirit’ behind the shape and of course the history. Like having Buddha statue, I always have a Ganesha or two around me since long. So it’s nice to know that my friend started enriching his life with Ganesha too now.

Let’s have a look at Ganesha’s attributes. I studied it thoroughly this morning and glad to know that I have practiced or at least I’m heading to practice life according to Ganesha’s quality. Look at the big head for think big, the large ears for listen more, the small eyes for concentrate, the small mouth for talk less, the one tusk for retain good throw away bad, the trunk for high efficiency and adaptability, the large stomach for peacefully digest all good and bad in life, the axe to cut off all bonds of attachment, and there are some more. It’s perfect attributes to lead us to have better attitude.

It’s human to have different perspective about something. For me, I think big. For others, I may think too big that I don’t touch ground, or too small to call big. For me, I listen more and talk less, for others I may appear cool (not calm cool but free from anxiety). For me, I retain good throw away bad, for others I may label things. For me, I cut off all bonds of attachment, for others I may appear less care. That’s why I try to free myself from labeling people. I simply tell myself that we are different. People are different. If they are negative, it’s them. I don’t need to fix. Even if I think they are being negative, I take the lesson so I will not end up the same. So it’s not easy to apply Ganesha’s attributes in daily life especially being a woman since women are often associated with like to see things from negative side. I can speak my own experience but actually I also learn from others’. Such circumstance makes me prefer to have larger stomach to peacefully digest all good and bad in life. I told a friend that I feel safe because I trust in the Universe and… lawyers!

Now how to deal with others' perception smartly. It’s not easy for me as Aquarian who is known for using the head more than heart. Yes, I like to think practical or think more of the actual doing rather than with theory and ideas. People may think we do not project our intention (including theory and good idea) to reach a goal but how can I plan out the actual doing without a strong base of an intention? How can I tell about the past for today’s lesson without appearing digging the past or being negative? How can I share my not-so-good feeling without appearing to judge? Again, it’s different perspective. Anyway, we cannot make everybody happy. I will just keep my good intention to act my best to make others feel comfortable. While I keep freeing myself from labeling and judging, as far as I could.

I believe many feel similar, we need a holiday after a holiday. Especially after a month-long holiday (it feels) in December. I managed to finalize my first-trip-in-2010 itinerary last night. A friend responded to my end-of-year catch-up by sharing her first itinerary for 2010. It rang my bell to join her! It took me weeks to cook my mood but I’m glad it didn’t take long (as often) to realize the itch for travel.

Life is already beautiful by having something to look forward to… Positive or negative does not matter much.

Ganesha in Neru I took yesterday.

It’s connection day!

My friend exclaimed after we finished a day of meeting people I and we know yesterday. We went to Sanur to enjoy the well-known Sunday market where people of Sanur and somewhere else meet from brunch till late-lunch time. It was not as busy as other Sundays. My dear friend didn’t have table for her jewelry as she had to rush home in America for a family matter. I also didn’t quite know some vendors selling in the market. The crowd was also quite new for me. I only knew a few but I made friend with one of the owner family members that was often seen around on Sundays. It had bothered me for some time that his face looked familiar so I came to him to ask if he was someone I knew in the past. What a brave me! He was not but then we talked that ended up I knew he has passion for old furniture! Good match!

My friend enjoyed his time observing people. Like my girlfriend said the place is perfect for ‘to see and be seen.’ I told my friend who’s who so he learned how people 'behave' in such place and how people live in Bali make a living. He was inspired by the way people multitasking like having several jobs that a part of them is voluntary job. It happened we met my friend who works as column writer in English newspaper in Jakarta and several other publications, interpreter, art curator, and interpreter in Denpasar court that he does voluntarily. I could see he was formulating his next life.

Great! We had nice chitchat (although some topics were quite consequential) while watching the sun moved closer to us. Sitting in the open air is my favorite especially after I could handle the sun better. And when the sun really caught us we had to move inside when we met our… Ubud friends! Oooh… so sad to see my good girlfriend looked not so good still. They just visited a hospital in Denpasar to get her lung examined. She has quite bad cough since a few days. She said she could not see us clearly since she felt half ‘existed.’ We could see her eyes were hardly open but she had the spirit to have nice lunch so it’s great we shared a table.

End of year often brought us to specific topics of what we have achieved and are going to in the new year. We kicked each other to do what we have passion for. We came to the topic about some great inventors started their venture from yucky garage. My friend made excuse because she does not have yucky studio enough to start producing beautiful artwork she is good at. She could not defend herself too long since she faced three ‘pushers’ who admire her a lot! It happened so fast that she agreed to sign a pact with herself about starting to work on her studio this coming month. She was the one who had the idea to make the pact so we all supported! We became the witnesses of her pact! It was so fun to see her eyes wide open before we left the café. I believe her spirit will bring good to her wellness these coming days! I’m happy to just think of it!

The late afternoon was still bright when we arrived Ubud that we wanted to push a little bit more. Make another new connection. We visited my friend in a village about 2 kilometers from Ubud main road. Beautiful surroundings! She has several businesses in Ubud that I’m interested to know to ‘expand’ mine so chatting with her was a good idea! In the end, she invited me to join her clubs (ranging from book club to volunteer club) and invited my friend to be speaker in one her club’s meetings. It was fun to talk with her. Soft spoken American.

Indian food as dinner was perfect to complete our long day with lots-of-fun connections!

The pact.

What’s on your mind?

Mopping porch. My friend often asked such question I can hardly reply. We Indonesian, or Javanese, are not used to share our feelings verbally. Although I’m not a good example of a Javanese still I’m not good in sharing my feeling orally in instant way. It takes me a couple seconds to minutes before I can come up with something to share. I have a lot in my mind at a time but how can I break them down in seconds and share them in a couple of minutes? Not many people have the patience to wait for one’s explanation. I learn. So I like to listen more than to talk. People need others to listen and I don’t mind to be on the ears side.

Back to what’s on my mind, I’m living without plan these holidays. I just follow whatever that comes whenever. I’m kind of tired with planning. That’s one thing I want to loosen up next year. Sometimes I appeared too stiff about what I want – stiff to myself that in the end it affects others too. Not good, not good. But, these days, I’m processing a new layout for my blog in mind. I thought about it while in shower, in bed before and after sleep, mopping floors, wiping car… It’s nice to work things out ‘virtually.’

I had nice time yesterday. Visiting a couple in Peliatan who is finishing their beautiful nest by rice field. I have been visiting many houses around Ubud and their house is among few that I don’t have issue during the tour. I mean… hardly one spot disturbed my freaky perfectionism. I accept the fact that in Ubud I cannot expect to see a perfect building like in Jakarta but nothing is impossible they say. And of course, the architect has become my favorite since long time. If I had project handled by him, I could sleep tight and wake up happy. Anyway, it’s great!

My friend and I also attended a photo exhibition in a contemporary art gallery in Mas. It’s a nice B/W photos on watercolor paper with nice Balinese frame. It reminded me of my experiment in the past. I also liked to print pictures on regular or colored paper then torn it off to give nice effect along the edge. So it’s refreshing to see the idea again. The exhibition opening was well attended by people who live in Ubud full time and part time so it’s nice to meet quite many people I know in the village. It’s like an impromptu get-together. It’s just pity that the opening was ‘too soft.’ No speech or mark to open the exhibition. We just enjoyed watching the vibrant American photographer walking around meeting people. He was such a scene himself: good looking, funky stylish, with B/W shoes and big jewelry from a well-known jeweler resides in Ubud. Realizing that many in the room are produced in Ubud (although by foreigners), I feel good to see that we support each other business.

Today is Sunday! It’s a bit cloudy after rain last night. Bali has really nice weather these days. I thank the Universe every day for the nice sun and a few rain sometime on the day. It’s perfect! Going to Sunday market must be perfect for Sunday morning.

Two boys playing with snakes I spotted in a warung in Tebongkang, Ubud.

your letter makes me want to travel again.

It was not the only response I got about how I have ignited my friends’ spirit to travel through my end-of-year catch-up. I got many nice responses. I enjoy the variety of the comments. Well I am impressed by your New Year catch up letter. Oh WOW!!! your email have indeed made me think and look back of what I have done in the past and what I would love to do in the future :-) Your plans read like the schedule of a foreign correspondent! Most of all, I enjoy their spirit to visit me in Ubud this coming year. I don’t mind if the plan doesn’t work. It’s the thought that counts! Lucky that I live in Ubud, I have better chance to see far-away friends!

It’s interesting to observe. Women like to examine, a friend told me. Sure! It’s nice to be an observer. Anyway, it’s interesting to know that many of my male friends responded. If I sent to a couple, it’s the male-partner who replied. I thought men are not so attentive but it seems I need to update my view. Even short, they are just nice to have shared their thought.

I spent almost all day attending Christmas lunch in a friend’s new house in the middle of a virgin village in Tegallalang. It’s nice to see a mix of people – Balinese and foreigners. As always, I learned new things through conversations with different people from different background. Now I’m serious about having colon hydrotherapy after I talked with a girl who once worked in a spa in… Ubud! That I need. A place closer to home. My friend and I have talked about having it in Canggu while doing our six-monthly honeymoon rrr outing. Girls days out! Then I learned about a new business opportunity. Then about life in general. As often…

I feel sleepy now but I still have a date to meet a friend who’s leaving Ubud tomorrow morning. We plan to enjoy blues music in our favorite café near Neru. Another friend and his family are also in Ubud that I didn’t have the energy to make time to meet this early evening. And tomorrow I am booked for two meetings with friends. It’s nice but… I have started planning my holiday after a year-end holiday! I hope it works!

A tree in front of a house in Duijzel, Netherlands.

Enjoy confusion!

My friend told my girlfriend before we parted the other day. He meant a good wish. I also believe confusion will result something better, if not good, after the period of turmoil passes. My friend is in transition between jobs that she hasn’t had idea what she wants to do in the next job. Yes, she is still looking for a job but cannot specify what she would like to do. Anyway, we all have once been in such circumstance. Ya?

The past days I made time to meet friends I didn’t see long time like a good friend from university days. It’s so nice to see him again, and in Ubud, so special! He was here with his three kids that I didn’t realize he has three! It was really fun to see him although for a short time only. I appreciated so much that he made the trip to Ubud just to see me.

It’s the season of meeting friends. I also got several invitations for celebrating Christmas and New Year. I haven’t set anything yet. It’s nice to ‘feel’ what I want to do as the days go. I’m a bit occupied around house also. I’m always proud of not having a helper to help me doing household chores but the past days I’m considering to delegate more chores to my gardener if I still want to keep the house free from other people. I feel older now, I’m physically tired doing housework! Ha ha… it got me at last. Also… I want to get used to be with ‘other people’ a few hours a day so not too much doing things on my own. It’s part of growing old wisely. I have an excuse.

It seems writing a blog-post in a time like this is not that easy. I need to respond to numerous text messages and emails especially after I managed to send out the end-of-year catch-up finally. Yay!! I made it.

My friend’s kids.