Back to School

I tried to be a good mom on Tuesday.  I tried to do what all those other good moms from all the conference talks do.  I took Rex out.  Just me and him to go back to school shopping.  Well, not really back to school since Rex has never really been to school in the first place, but whatever.  I was hoping for some real bonding time; some Rex will know he's really important time; some Rex will remember this forever time.   Reality: Rex was a bit confused. Grandma Libby watched Alice and Rex and I went to Target.  The first thing Rex said when we got inside was, "Where's Alice?"  I explained that she stayed home with Grandma so that just me and him could go out.  He was still concerned that we'd left Alice at home.  I just took him to the clothes section. I told him he could pick out one shirt to wear on the first day of Joy School next week.  He picked the first shirt he saw, and then the second, and then he headed over to the girls rack.  I steered him back to the boys clothes and about 20 minutes later he'd finally chosen a shirt and only because I said I'd buy him an ICEE.  So we got his shirt and a few other things that needed buying and headed to the check out and then to the ICEE machine.  He liked this part the best.  In the end, I don't think he cared much.  He was excited to show Dad his new shirt and he hasn't even asked to wear it--it's for the first day of school.   I think Rex would rather sip chocolate milk and read stories on my bed than go shopping.  I think I would too.  At least I tried, right?

Showing off his new T-Rex shirt

And his blue ICEE tongue

As a side note: on the way home we were talking about going to Joy School and how much fun it was going to be and Rex asked if I was going to stay with him.  I told him no.  He asked me to stay at school with him even though it's just going to be at Jack's house.  Then today he asked if I was going to stay with him at Grandma's house when we went over for dinner.  I think he's a bit more nervous for school than he lets on.

Speaking of back to school,  I went back this week too.  I've been a little nervous about going back.  Because Rex doesn't nap anymore I don't have all that extra time to study.  Meaning I have 2-3 hours a night to study.  So I was nervous about having to spend all my free time reading and never getting any sleep.  And then I "went" to class on Wednesday night (it was a Skype-type conference call since I'm in North Carolina and everyone else is in Utah) and I was super hyper the rest of the night.  I had more energy; I had more to say; I was happier; I just felt better (you know, emotionally--we all know that this year has been a rough one for me).  I guess I'm a major dork, but I really like school.  I forget that I like it, but in the end, I really like school and it makes me happy.

Thank you Pinterest

I got bored so I checked out Pinterest for some ideas of how to entertain myself  my children.  I decided to focus on spiders this week.  I planned at least 5 or 6 activities to do during Alice's nap time and then some that both children could do while I made dinner.  And then Rex took a nap every day (what!) so we did our activities as whole family activities every night.  It was fun. So, thank you Pinterest.  Just to be fair, here's the link to the blog where I got most of my ideas.  

First we tried to capture some spider webs.  Baby powder + hair spray +construction paper=failure but they had fun trying.

Second, we learned spiders have 8 legs (or 10 or 2 or whatever other number Rex comes up with) by making no-bake cookies and adding pretzel legs.

 Third we learned about weaving webs by weaving a web on a quilting hoop (this was my very own idea--I did NOT get from Pinterest so somebody Pin It! now)

 We went to the library and got tons of books about spiders.  I asked Rex to go get dressed and do his chores one day and this what I found.

 Later that day, again while he was supposed to be doing a chore (seriously all he has to do is put his pillows on his bed.  I do everything else.  All he does is the pillow and it is sooooo painful for him)

 This was an non-spider related activity chosen specifically for Alice.  1 bar Ivory soap + 1 cup Borax + 2 rolls of toilet paper + lots of warm water= 1 hour of fun...for Rex.  Alice hated it so played monster trucks with Dad in the other room.

 Last night, Rex pretended to be a spider and made a huge spider web in the bike room.  He woke up to a bunch of bugs caught in his web (that Mom had colored and cut out of a coloring book--though we did wake up to a real mouse.. Next week's blog post: Why the South is still a terrible place to live).  We then drew, colored, and cut out more bugs to add to the web.  We also caught several Alice bugs.  I took the web down tonight.

 Next week, lizards.  Any ideas?

S is spiders and sweet boys or my Spit and vinegar Alice

The number one job of parents is to worry:  are he kids growing enough?  are they getting adequate sleep?  are they going to climb into the fireplace and get stuck to a mouse trap (maybe another day I'll share this fun story)?  are they playing nice...blah blah blah.

Back in January, I got called as Laurel adviser and as such have been reminded of how absolutely terrible it is to be a teenager.  I never want to do that again (good thing I don't have to).  I keep picturing my kids as teenagers and then I worry more and more and more.  There are terrible, horrible things out there that weren't out there when I was in high school.  And I don't know how to keep my kids away from them. And so I worry.

Rex is sweet.  Almost too sweet.  The kind of sweet that is almost naive.  He likes to follow rules and be part of the in-crowd.  All of these traits could be good--unless he decides to follow all the unwritten rules of deragned high school children.  I worry that he'll get sucked in to their nonsense and will be too tender-hearted to know how to stand up for himself.  I'm afraid he'll get crushed.

Back at my parents' house--Rex with Great-great Grandpa Rex's hat and cane

And he's done with this little photo shoot.

Alice is all spit-and-vinegar.  She knows what she wants and she will have it no matter the physical harm it may cause her (thinking sticky mouse traps).  She doesn't move for people.  She doesn't follow directions.  She stops doing something as soon as you notice she's doing it (for 3 prayers she folded her arms until I noticed that she was doing it, now she refuses).  She's determined.  She decided when she was 6 months old that she wanted to learn how to walk, and now she does at 10 1/2 months.   Next, she wants to learn how to ride a bike.  I worry about her rebelliousness just a bit.  I worry that she'll kick against the rules and turn the other way.

Alice's new thing--bringing me books and then plopping down on my lap to read them

What I see most often of Alice

Greg and I were discussing this the other day, and decided that the best way to parent our children is to convince them that we are not the enemy.  Now I just have to figure out how to do that.

Virtue #1 (as in feel free to skip this post unless you want to know how insightful I am on all things religious)

Here we go again: This requirement asks that I read a variety of scriptures and then write the promised blessing of being sexually clean and pure.

Scripture #1: Moroni 9:9 tells that chastity and virtue are the things most precious and dear.  I find Moroni's qualitification interesting here.  There are a lot of precious and dear things--families, children, integrity, faith, testimony, and, I don't know, salvation, just to name a few, but Moroni says that chastity is most precious and dear.  Meaning that is it more precious than a variety of other attributes.  Of course, he doesn't say THE most just most, so maybe he was just trying to make a point and emphasize one thing without de-emphasizing another.  Maybe I'm reading too much into it.

Scripture #2: Jacob 2:28: We learn that the Lord God delights in the chastity of women, which, in this particular scripture, is referring to the practice of plural marriage, but we won't get into that.  I have a lot of feminists thoughts that go along with this scripture, but I don't think they add much, if anything, to the discussion, so I'll keep them to myself.  I will note, however, that in the context of the chapter, the Lord is not rebuking women for being a little too free, but the men for forcing/coercing/allowing the women to be more free than they should--or in this case, engaging in plural marriage.

The Family Proclamation: First off, it's been a long time since I've read the whole thing, all the way though and I must admit that I was tempted to be lazy once again and only read the first column (because it's so long), and wow.  Those last two paragraphs.  Forceful.  In terms of the blessings of maintaining sexual purity, I think one of the biggest ones is not having to stand accountable (in a bad way) before God.  I don't even like to be accountable to Rex for forgetting to buy chocolate milk--Rex can be pretty...well he's three, we'll just put it that way.  Another thing I noticed this time reading the Proclamation is how global it is.  Often when we talk about chastity we talk in terms of the guilt or STDS or pregnancy the individual will (may) suffer, but the Proclamation moves beyond the individual to the family, country, world, and society at large.  Our individual chastity and the strong families that are formed, in part, from it, have a global effect.

Article of Faith #13: We like good things.  We look for and actively seek good, virtuous, chaste things--did I mention I haven't watched The Daily Show for at least a month now?  It's not the most virtuous or lovely show out there, even if it is hilarious and a fairly decent source of news.

For the Strength of Youth: I like it.  Not too harsh, not too soft.  Mostly just doctrine.  This is a bit of a side note but I've noticed lately that we are actually teaching youth doctrine and not just lists of things to do and not to do.  This section of the For the Strength of Youth explains why sexual sin is so serious rather than just saying that it is.  It took me years to understand why we are to be chaste.  I was because I was 'post to (as John Bytheway would say), but I didn't understand why.  I'm glad that the why is included--why are we chaste?  Because sexual intimacy creates children and that's what gods do they create.  So if you're going to be like a god, then you really need to be like a god, and do it in the proper order with the proper authority.

Proverbs 31: 10-31: Mentions virtue once and strength twice--a virtuous woman is clothed in strength and honor.  There's a link there--between honor and strength.  It takes great spiritual strength and strength of character to raise above and maintain virtue, so while virtue is a lovely word and idea, I think I favor strength, as least in my semi-feminists, 21century way I do.

So let's sum this all up and answer the question: What are the promised blessings of being sexually clean and pure?

First, to focus on the individual: those who are sexually pure don't have to stand before and explain their sins...That may be the biggest blessing, at least for me, as mentioned.  Second, and this is also important to me, is a strong family.  I am pretty sure that if I were to go back on my promise to Greg and Heavenly Father in this respect, I would loose my family, and they are pretty much the most important thing to me.  Or it.  The group of us.  The unit.  Or, as Rex puts it, "Our whole fambly."  But strong families in general are important--that's one thing I learned in my two-year-tenure as a teacher--families are so important.  Those students that came from the idea, nuclear family, did better than those who did not.  They got better grades, they coped with the stress of school better, they interacted with their peers in healthier ways.  Families are pretty important.  But when one or both people in a relationship fail to live up to that, as I understand it, the emotional pain is immense and the family usually falls apart and so do the lives of the children.  That's not to say that children are doomed to failure when their parents fail because they aren't--lots of successful people come from broken homes, it's just harder when the family is not intact and strong.  Other blessing include that list of, what I consider peripheral things, such as lack of STDS, lack of unwanted pregnancy, lack of nasty name calling and hard break ups.

Lastly, I am so commit to being chaste: done and done.

8.13.12

For family night last night, Rex wanted to learn about Moses (I sing "Go Down Moses" to him all the time).  Rex and I were in the middle of sequencing the pictures we'd drawn about the Exodus and Passover, when Alice did this.  

(I'm supposed to take Greg's voice off but I don't know how, so don't make fun of him tooo much for sounding like a little girl)

She did this a bunch.  And then more today.  She'll be full blown walking in a week I think.  She is such an independent baby.  Rex still really likes me to play with him and carry him around, and while Alice hates being left alone in a room, she is content to play alone and away from me and Rex (this may be for more for self-preservation than for anything else).  She's also very certain of what she wants and screams/grunts until she gets it.  Yesterday she threw her first angry tantrum because I put her kiwi on a toothpick, which she wanted to do herself.  I may be a bit concerned about her in a year or two, but I guess that's why we put locks on children's doors?

Divine Nature #3

I don't have a bucket list.  I know they're supposed to make you feel better about yourself as you cross things off the list, but what if life happens and you never cross anything off?  I don't want to get to the end of my life and feel bad that I never went skydiving, which I NEVER want to do, just for the record.  Nevertheless, I was feeling a bit that I didn't have any goals to work towards.  Luckily for me, I'm the Laurel adviser at church so I got out my handy-dandy Personal Progress book and decided to get my medalion again, even if I don't get the actual necklace. I also decided to chronicle my adventures here because 1. it's required to write about most of the experiences in one's journal, and 2. just in case the Laurel's read this, I want them to see what I'm doing.

I am completing my first requirement right now: it is Divine Nature #3.  For the last few weeks I have been trying extra hard to strengthen my relationship with Gregory and to show him increased love.  I tried to make him breakfast and lunch everyday and left little notes telling him different things I love about him or thanking him for something he'd done.  I've tried to stop asking him how much things cost and instead have him tell me about his new purchases.  I even read parts of a personality test Greg took a while back.  That was the most interesting.  Here's a few things I learned about Greg while doing this: I don't make him a big enough breakfast; he really likes to tell people about his purchases and will eventually tell them about what a great deal he got; he works best when his achievements are highlighted--that I learned from the personality test.  It was one of those things I sort of knew about him but had a hard time putting into words.  Really reading that personality test was super helpful in better understanding Greg because it took all my experiences with him, grouped them together and then explained them in a clear concise way.  It was nearly spot on.  I try to think back to it when Greg and I have to have serious conversations because as I think about those neat little definitions I can think of ways to frame the discussion in terms that are positive for him.  So what did I learn about divine nature? Or more specifically about Greg's divine nature?  That he has one.  That his motivations are as sweet as they can be.  He really just wants to provide for and care for and be with his family.  Sometimes he gets distracted from those goals, but don't we all?  It was a fun little experiment and I think I'll continue, like a good little wifey.

Mom clothes

I have decided that this is the perfect mom outfit.  So perfect in fact that I wear it (or something similar) pretty much every day.  I get up in the morning and I put my workout clothes on.  And there they stay until I run AND shower, which didn't happen yesterday until after dinner.  This outfit is perfect because it gives me an excuse not to do a huge list of personal hygiene items (brush hair, shave legs, shower...) and props for working out (wow, she has two little kids and still manages to get a workout in, good for her.  I wish I could be more like her).  But I don't actually always get a run in.  Sometimes, I just don't have time/patience to listen to children whine to shower, dress, blow dry and style hair, apply make-up, so I just put workout clothes on instead.  I look like I've been productive; I smell like I've been productive; but really, I just didn't want to shower.  And I'm super comfortable all day.  It's amazing.  

To create this look: run fingers through hair only slightly.  Just enough to get hair into a tight ponytail--remember you want people to think that you've been working out.  I like to match my tighter fitting tank tops with my looser fitting shorts and my tighter shorts with my looser tank tops--this gives the I'm working out, not trying to attract unwanted attention vibe out.  Your tank and shorts don't necessarily have to match.  They can, it's an option, but again we're going for the I-really-don't-care-what-you-think-I-just-want-to-run-because-it-makes-me-feel-good style here not the matchy-matchy I-go-to-the-gym-to-pick-up-on-guys thing.  Match with a pair of well worn and tied athletic shoes and you're good to go.  This whole assemble really shouldn't take more than 5-10 minutes to put together, depending on whether or not you feel like wearing deodorant and how whiny the children are and where Alice hide your favorite hair tie.  

8.1.12

As it turns out, Southerns are a mullet-hating crew.  You wouldn't think that.  I mean they're from the South. Don't you have to love if not sport a mullet if your claim to fame is the Nascar Hall of Fame? Apparently not because I got  at least 19 comments a day from my so-called friends about Alice's mullet.  I agree: it was a mullet and looked a bit magey at times, a little stringy, maybe a little trashy.  But she's a baby.  If babies aren't allowed to have bad hair, who is?  It was getting to the point that I was afraid to put Alice down near my "friends" as they have a bad history with cutting other people's children's hair.  So I decided to cut it.  Rex was my photographer.

The next day, I cut another inch or so off to even it out.  She lost patients with me on day one so we had to wait.  Ultimately, I love her haircut.  She has an adorable little bob (think baby Suri Cruz) now that I plan to let her grow out, but hopefully this time it will be a bit more even and a bit less mullet.  So there you have it, Alice's first hair cut at 10 months old.