My thoughts on fashion in a Plus-Size World

I went shopping tonight. Wasn't supposed to go shopping but took the kids out to the mall for pictures at Kiddie Kandids and was told there was a 2 hour wait. No clean shirt is going to last that long so I roamed the mall instead. I love shopping end of season sales and got a few great deals for the boys. So far, I'm having a pretty good time. Then I think, "maybe, there might be some good deals on capris." I'm about 2 pair short of a comfortable rotation. Surely, I can find at least one pair to get me through the end of summer. BIG mistake.

Now, I admit I hesitated to write about this. I'm driving home thinking about wanting to write about this but feel embarrassed because who wants to write about the struggles of finding clothes in your size? You may be blushing even reading about it. But, I'm obviously no size 2 so I don't think it'll come as a shock to anyone that I shop with the larger ladies. After quickly going through Macy's and not finding anything I walk by C.J. Banks. I don't even go in. No interest at all in wearing things with American Flags, birds or funky (and not in a good sense) denim ensembles. Old Navy is nearby so I drive over there. Mini-skirts, halter tops and the latest fashion fad, the shrug, abound. "There must be some happy medium," I think to myself. My body couldn't and shouldn't try to wear the exact fashion as the skinnies. But I don't think at 30 years old I should be resigned to wear what 50 year-olds do either. Obviously, my goal is to avoid this situation altogether and get back to wearing a normal size. But in the meantime, could someone please make nice, modest, cute clothes for plus size? And could you make enough so that there are leftovers for end of season mark down? Have you seen how many size 1's and 2's are on clearance?

By the way, I did buy a pair of capris. Full price.

Sinkers and Floaters

Happy Henry

I'm a floater. Very buoyant. Of course, increased body fat only helps my cause but even in my prime, I was a floater. When I taught swimming lessons, I realized that not everyone experiences ease at this task. But I firmly believed ( and still do....kind of) that even if your body is sinking, as long as your chin is up and your back arched, your face will at least stay out of the water. Then Jay came along to disprove my theory. He is a sinker. Seriously. The boy can't float. It frustrates me because I think if I could just invade his body and arch enough and lift enough, I could get that sinking body to float.

Seth and Sammy started swimming lessons yesterday. Seth has inherited his father's buoyancy and Sammy seems to have mine. Seth can swim but if he isn't moving then he is sinking. His teacher has him doing back glides and they are supposed to push off of the wall, glide and then float. He bravely pushes off, glides....and sinks. He has his work cut out for him, I fear.

I think I can....I think I can

Sammy, on the other hand, easily floats. Good thing because that kid NEEDS the extra help to compensate for his lack of fear around water. I don't think it'll be long before Sammy catches up with Seth's skill level.

I love this stuff

But Seth's skinny density will serve him well in other endeavors. Like....splunking.

Cars

No, this isn't about the latest Disney/Pixar movie. The is about my frustration with the automobile. I have a weird relationship with cars. As early as I can remember, I have always been a bit fascinated with driving and types of cars. I loved steering or changing gears for my brother in our old Subaru before I had my drivers license. And I have this ability to recognize most types of cars from pretty far away. It's a great time passer on road trips. I identify the oncoming cars - make and model. Never year. That's way too hard. But I can give you the model years. I'm mostly aware of when companies changed their body styles -- especially when headlight style changes. That's a dead giveaway. Most companies do that every 3-4 years. So...basically....I like cars. I know absolutely nothing about how they run or maintenance, however. In fact, cars that don't run stress me out. My dad isn't a big believer in having new things - particularly cars. He is the least vain person I know so we never had anything stylish or latest or greatest...just what was practical and affordable. We had a BIG station wagons (not just the converted honda accords or subarus) but the mammoth, diesel 3 bench seat variety. I remember it almost always overheating over ANY mountain pass we went over. That's my earliest stress memory in relation with cars. Watching that temperature gauge rising -- racing against the mile left going uphill. Stopping on the side of the road to let it cool off or pouring water on whatever part of the car you would pour water over or into (like I said...I really know nothing). And that was our nice station wagon. The other was my dad's commuter vehicle with no frills.

The college/high school car was a horrific Ford Tempo. This car had really no redeemable qualities other than the cool timer display that we could reset every time we took a road trip to try to make record time. It squealed, leaked oil, had no power. It leaked oil so bad that each time you used it you had to check the oil dipstick. then add oil. I remember toward the end of its era, putting 5 quarts of oil in it during a 500 mile road trip. Every time I drove it, it stressed me out.

I could seriously go on and on about the schmorgasboard of cars in my life. Then I met Jay who had a brand new Subaru Impreza. He jokes that it wasn't exactly a chick magnet due to its carribean mist color (very identifyable) but in a way it was. It was just so reliable and everything worked! Those early years of our marriage were great. I knew so many couples that just had crap cars. I felt really lucky to have a car that ran so well and was so dependable. But, we got too big for the car. And as great as it was...it had no features that are a must with a mom. It was a manual transmission (which I actually like) but having toddlers that need teddy grahams while driving...it just doesn't work. Plus, no power locks. With two kids...that just became ridiculous.

So the time came to upgrade. And what does any kid-toting mom without too much vanity crave??? A fashionable minivan! Before we bought it, I would longingly look at them when I drove by any car dealership. Then most of my friends were buying them and two of my sisters and I had that pit in my stomach that they were all going to be gone before we could buy one. But the glorious day came when I got a call back from a dealership accepting my lowball offer on a 2004 Chrysler Town and Country. I knew this van must be mine when I drove it. This was my very first car purchase ever and I became quite a snob. I wanted the power doors and hatch. I wanted leather. Had to have captain chairs in the 2nd row. And the DVD player...a given. The perk was that Jay also really wanted me to have this van. He said that he wanted me to have a car that everytime I got into it was just a happy experience for me. He knows the drill...happy wife/mom = good things for him! Plus, he's just a good, generous guy like that. But we all know nothing is perfect and this van has proven not to be. I know that I can't expect it to have NO problems, but I admit that I expected them to be avoided for years. Yesterday, I had to spend over $300 for new brakes. Ugh. Last year, in hopefully a total fluke thing, the battery had to be replaced. Now, the warranty is expired and I hope that the old stresses of my life don't return. I love this van. I just want it to run well. Perhaps, I need to be a bit more like my dad who sees nothing absurd in putting a new engine or whatever in his Delta 88 oldsmobile. But it could be worse. I could be driving what Jay does. Toyota Truck

Perfect Summer Day

I can't really think of a better way to spend a hot, summer day than at the lake with friends. Growing up, I schemed and plotted to get invited out to the lake with friends that had boats. Or I would just go with my friends to float on floaties and tan. Love, love, love the combination of being hot, cooling off, mixing it up with waterskiing or tubing, lounging about some more and having all of that time to just socialize and hang out. Luckily, our great friends here both own boats! Yesterday, Jason and Andrea Hainsworth invited us to their family lake place for the day. Jay had to work but anyone married to a medical student or resident eventually learns that one cannot wait for spouses schedules to clear to do anything fun. I have long ago become comfortable going to things without him. He was able to come later and join the fun.

Seth and Emma

We went out in the morning and the boys immediately started digging in the sand, kayaking, and exploring. Our other friends the Rolands were there too but Kariann's husband also had to work so just Andrea's husband, Jason, was there with the 3 wives and babysitter. He took the older kids out on the boat and we were able to just sit in the sun and talk. When he came back, the three of us took the younger kids out to tube and swim. My boys had a ball. They love to go fast and over the bumps. I'm glad they are comfortable on the water. It will make it all that more fun when we are able to get our own boat. Andrea and Jason had hired a babysitter for the week so I was always able to leave Henry there and put him down for the very necessary naps. Chris and Lara Caviness came after lunch with their 3 kids which added to the fun. Later, all of the adults went and left almost all of the kids (12 of them) to waterski and wakeboard. We picked up Jay and Chad and everyone had a turn getting up on one ski and all of the boys wakeboarded. The boat we were on was extremely nice and could easily pull skiiers up with that many people on it. We really had a great time and by the time we returned to the cabin we had been gone for 3 hours! All of the kids were fine but overly ready for dinner so we mass produced that meal and then started getting ready to go home.

Sammy, Alec and Abbie

Perfect summer day. If we are sent to earth to gain experiences and meet people for a reason, we have become friends with the Hainsworths and the Rolands to first convert Jay to love watersports and to learn about the best kind of boat to buy!

What the.....

This is Seth's new phrase. I first noticed him saying it last week. I admit I smiled to myself. Lamented a bit about the continuing loss of his innocence but knew that he is still such a pure little boy. But then he seemed to be saying it alot and I felt I needed to parent and guide him to better phrasology. So I told him that perhaps he could say something else during those times that "what the...." came to his lips. I suggested, "huh?" or "hello!" But he kept saying it. I mean, he has absolutely no idea what most of the world finished that sentence with. So I mentioned it to Jay and told him to notice when Seth said it next.

When Seth said "what the...."it for the first time around Jay, we both chuckled and then Jay asked him why he said it. Had he heard it on a T.V. show. At school? What deliquent corrupted out son? He smiled and responded, "It's what mom says."

I honestly had no idea that I said that. Ever. Oops. At least I stop after "the..." Nothing like teaching by example. Now what other bad habit is he going to pick up on???

Best Day Ever...

I'm a pretty laid back person. Definitely not a "have-to-be-on-the-go" type gal. But I'm a bit worried I'm erring on the side of complete bore. School has been out for a month and my kids have been playing great together. But our schedules are pretty wide open. I like it that way. I feel a bit guilty when I listen to other moms who are already tired of their kids saying "I'm bored!". My kids NEVER say that. They might say something is boring if I won't let them do something and suggest something else but they are great at just filling up the time on their own. It usually involved sounds of blasters and light sabers but I'm not complaining. Anyhoo...Yesterday was a day of errands. Henry had his 6 month check-up and I couldn't find a sitter so I hauled all 3 boys to the dr's office. O.K...to set up the situation, Seth had actually made a comment earlier in the day about how bummed he was that HE wasn't getting shots because you get treats from the nurse if you do. I laughed it off and said he should be glad. The boys do fantastic at the office and I promise them a sour treat (their favorite) if they can refrain from wrestling, loud pretend fighting, jumping off of the exam table etc. But the nurse surprises all of us when she brings in ziplocs full of tootsie rolls and gum for each boy. They were thrilled. Halloween all over. Jay is working across the street so we walk over there to say "hi". Nothing exciting. He is studying for written boards and preparing an abstract and powerpoint presentation for resident conference so he was a bit stressed out and not all that social. We leave after 10 minutes and stop at the pharmacy to get two prescriptions filled. After that, we are walking to the van and Seth says, "Mom, this was so much fun...I wish we could do this again." Their standards for fun are seriously low.

So, today I set out to top yesterday's best day ever. How do you top Dr.'s appt and hospital visit? Try spending 2 hours at the Chrysler Service station! The fun never stops! True, I did take them to the YMCA just before and they spent 40 minutes in the day care and 30 in the swimming pool. But the service station has a lego table which they immediately used to build star fighters and guns. Amazingly, they are happily entertained with that for the entire 2 hours. I don't have to intervene at all. When the service manager brought me my key and I told the boys it was time to go, they were actually disappointed. Sammy asked me if we could come back again tomorrow. I guess I should count my blessings for having such happy-go-lucky kids but I fear Seth is in for a rude awakening when school starts again, and they have to give the ubiquitous "what I did over summer vacation" report.

Trying to figure this out

Every blog I have read looks so nice and professional. I'm not exactly a computer dummy but I cannot figure out how to make this look like others I have read. It's frustrating because I am a very visual learner. Have someone show me how to do something and I can do it easily. But reading computer jargin and trying to figure out everything from reading the instructions just isn't my style. So, either this is gonna stay ugly or I need to find a local blogger for some help!

I'm mostly using this for a journal. I have always tried to keep one but I'm not the type of person who jots down 2 or 3 lines and then can happily go to bed. No...I lay it all out. My angst, joy, love...whatever. And because I can type a whole heckuva lot faster than I write...I'm hoping this will fulfill that desire. I'd also love to stay in touch with friends. I have been reading one of my friends blogs and felt so involved in her life that I realized how fabulous it would be if I could do that with other friends. I was influenced by her so maybe someone will be influenced by me. Share and share alike, you know? Hopefully, I won't put too much out there and then feel all sheepish and have disclosure regret. That happens to me all the time. I'll start simple. And if I ever do go too far...feel free to post annonomously...TMI!

Crazy Title

I know...crazy title. In 8th grade, we were assigned penpals in France in our French class. I started writing a boy named Lucien who ended his first letter with this as a postscript. Well, of course as a culturally sensitive 13 year-old, I immediately made fun of his quirky phrase with all of my friends. My friend, Jill, even made me some decorative wall art (with glitter!) that I had as a room decoration all through high school.

I hadn't really thought of it since high school until wondering what to name my blog. I wanted a title that reflected the craziness of life for a stay-at-home mom of young children whose husband is a busy medical resident and gone a lot. So, if you think of it, this nonsensical phrase actual is quite profound. My life is really a big spasm....who flows. Time keeps on tickin', and we love it. All right, you got me...it really makes no sense at all.