Nov 27, 2008

Nov 25, 2008

source of happiness


this is aiman. i think so.i guess.x ingat apa nama dia sebenarnye.anyway.he is a cuite isn't he.found him playing around in cyberpark with her mother and siblings.he so adorable and makes me wanted to smile.somehow i felt calm when dealing with kids.even when i am stressed out.i love children so much.so maybe that is one way i can released my tension and stress.playing with kids.have fun.forget the world.and be a kid once more.where everything is fun and no problems to think about.

honesty

honestly, can anyone be sincere of what they feel about others?can the like be sincere about what they think and do?i don't think so.even a tiny single lies.they just cannot be honest can they?i am so sorry that my point of view towards others has changed.a lot.since that incident.since what happened.everyone is using everyone.that is what i think.now.
now here i am.sitting alone in my room.doing nothing but staring on the empty wall of our room.yes.i am alone.alone and miserable.just please, i beg you.someone.anyone.would you care to understand me.even if you are a stranger. i won't mind.just please.and now.here i am.feeling so upset.like my world has gone down the drain.my heart is empty.like a cave so dark where no lights can be seen.i am looking for you.my light.the light that have fade away.fading away and leaving me alone.crying. all on my own.with no where to go and no one to turn to.please oh please.find me again.

Nov 23, 2008

benci

aku..emotional.over sensitif
yeah.memang aku macam tu
dari dulu dan sejak azali lagi
so kenapa korang peduli
aku cepat terasa
memang.korang ambik tahu ke?
tade kan.so just get lost

tapi.aku senyum.pura-pura.
depan semua.saja nak cover.
kenapa?
nak jaga hati.yeah.jaga hati semua
tapi korang?ada jaga hati aku?
tade kan?korang x peduli pun

dulu.ada orang cakap kat aku.
tayah pikir la orang lain.just be yourself
bole ke?.bullshit je semua tu
kalau aku jadi diri aku korang boleh terima ke?
aku emosi.cepat terasa.kuat cemburu.sangat sensitif
korang boleh terima ke?
aku takkan peduli lagi
sebab korang pun tak peduli kan aku
kawan konon.bila perlu baru cari.whatever!

Nov 22, 2008

i hate it when i tried to tell someone or anyone about something, people keep on trying to ignore me. and the fact that i was being surrounded by a lot of people and friends, i still felt alone. alone and miserable. faking a happy smile to others.
i hate it when i keep trying hard to help and to do something good, everyone just stood there and watch me like i am a mad girl talking about things that make no sense at all to them.
trying hard to figure out this that will make them respect me more is hard and tired. and i hate it. so damn hate it a lot. and i envy the life that they lead. seems like it was easy for them though. but for me? just wanted to be alone.

Nov 18, 2008

black is beauty

i always love the color black since i was a little girl.. and people keep asking me, why black?

herm. yeah. why black? there still like gazillion colors out there. much more beautiful and interesting to look at rather than plain black. why black?

well.black is cool. its simple and nice.it gives me comfort and the most important thing is that black gives me confident. when i wear something black i felt more confident to myself. i have the confidence to talk to other people and be in front of crowd. my friends said that black is boring. the truth is black is not boring. in fact is more interesting to me than other colors. and black give me comfort too. whenever i wear black i felt save. save to be me and save to show myself. and i am comfortable with it.

the fact is : with black i can just be me, MYSELF.

Nov 13, 2008

you are beautiful

and i have been listen to this song over and over again ( tell me im pretty by samantha mumba). it is soooo true and the lyrics was soooo right. all of you girls out there are beautiful in your own way and you dont need anyone to tell you that. yes we still need compliment from others sometimes to boost our confident level but the most important facts is we know that we are special on our own. so you girls out there...YOU ARE SOOOO BEAUTIFUL

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Don't need you to tell me I'm pretty
To make me feel beautiful
I don't need you to give me your strength
And make me feel I'm strong
I've got all of the strength that I need
Here inside my own two hands
All that I want is your love
And respect for who I am
What I really need
Comes from deep inside of me

Don't need you to tell me I'm pretty
To make me feel beautiful
Don't need to you make me strong
'Cause I'm strong on my own
Doesn't come from outside
This beauty I know
Comes from inside my soul

Don't need you to tell me I'm pretty

I don't need you to believe in me
To make me know I'm worth believing in
I don't need you to lift me up, I don't know
I can stand tall (I can stand tall)
I can stand my own ground
I can stand proud up on my own two feet
Don't have to be a part of somebody else to be complete
What I really need comes from deep inside of me

Don't need to come to you for confirmation
Because I've finally come to this revelation
What I really need (What I really need)
I'm gonna find inside of me (Find inside of me)
Not in somebody else
Respect comes when you respect yourself

Don't need you to tell me I'm pretty
To know I'm beautiful

respect

for the first time i watch legally blonde. i have been waiting to watch this movie for ages. the important things here is not the movie but what i have learn from it. being a girl is really a hard work to maintain because people tends to judge us girls as weak, dependent,unreliable and etc..i don't say that this situation happens to anyone especially when we live in a world where boys and girls is treated as an equal but somehow there are still some people that still thinks the old fashion way.I've learned that in order to succeed we don't have to rely on others opinion about you. be confident and work hard to gain others respect. this way it will be more worth it. there are strength hidden inside everyone.it just the matter of time and how you wanted to use it , that's all.

Nov 4, 2008

tag by ajinda pemain musika

1. Take a screenshot of your desktop without moving/closing any of the windows.
2. Tag 5 people!




the 5 people are :
- kak sarah
- bahia
- lala
- bear
- alan

Nov 2, 2008

rumah tua

aku kembali setelah lama menyepi
ke rumah kosong yang pernah kudiami
kembali untuk mengimbau kenangan
kembali mengejar masa silam
kembali ke zaman kanak-kanak yang telah hilang

suatu ketika dahulu
inilah tempatku
disinilah aku bertatih, berjalan dan berlari
tempat aku diajar mengaji
tempat bernyanyi dan menari
tempat sembunyi dikala susah hati

perlahan aku memasuki
kerumah kosong yang tiada berpenghuni
sunyi....sepi
aku menjengah kedalam ruangan kosong itu
masih seperti dulu tidak terusik
nampak berusia dan ditinggalkan
dulunya kemas dan bersih sentiasa
sekarang berdebu dan berhabuk semuanya

sayang...
jika dilihat oleh mata tua itu
pasti sedih dia
pasti menangis dia
pasti tidak terjangka oleh mindanya
tapi malangnya
si tua itu sudah tiada
hampir seabad perginya
rumah tua peninggalannya semakin sesak
sesak pada pandangan si pelihat
dulunya cantik berwarna warni
kini kusam tidak berwarna berlumut di sisi
semak samun memagari
mata si cucu menjadi saksi
hancur punah harapan di hati
mengharap berkumpul di suatu hari
di rumah tua yang bakal diruntuhkan tidak lama lagi

Nov 1, 2008

what makes you SMILE??




I was looking through flickr and I found this page and was inspired by it to write this post by www.flickr.com/photos/jasonmcd/2271534276/.

So here are few things that make me smile (not in order):

- Waking up on time, in a good mood.
- presents
- listening to the exact song I want to listen over and over again.
- Surprises (good ones of course.)
- making other people happy (especially someone who is sad)
- wear something nice
- Funny things.
- jokes not the lame one of course
- New things. I tend to get so excited about everything especially new things
- Thinking back on some embarrassing moments, (there's been way too many.)
- making new friends.
- Complements.
- getting good grades and being praised by the lecturer
- A text or message or letter out of the blue from someone I haven't talked to in a long time.
- The sound of true laughter.
- little kids and babies
- anything cute
- When I find money in my pocket! (I have habits to keep my money everywhere XP)
- a simple cute text message from anyone
- spending time with my friends
- Remembering those 'back in the day' moments makes me smile.
- talking to my mom
- get a hug
- a smile from other people and it is really very pleasant indeed


I'll probably add more as I think of them. I think I will be a very good idea to get to know what makes other people smile. so I make this a tag.
:)

list down things that make you smile :D
Post this as : What makes you smile??
Tag :

Ajwad
Syakir
Ally
Sal
Kak sara
Lala
Anna
Bear
Yaya
Mein
ghazi

i hope you will keep on SMILING

to my very best friend during in MRSM shasha, take note that i will always be there for you. specially dedicated for you and i want you to remember it:

“I’m going to smile and make you think I’m happy, I’m going to laugh, so you don’t see me cry, I’m going to let you go in style, and even if it kills me- I’m going to smile”

thanks a lot pak cik JPJ!!


to think that i may have to extend my driving class till the end of this month really makes me mad. not because of i cant drive but it is because of those JPJ officers from alor setar.this morning like usual i woke up early and getting read for my driving class. at about 8 am the car that supposedly to come and fetch me hast arrived yet.so i keep on waiting until 830 and they still not here so i called kak ros ( the manager)
*ignore the kedah slang :P

kak ros : hello
me: hello kak ros...lana ni.kete x sampai-sampai lagi ni.macam mana??x larat tunggu dah ni.
kak ros : owh ya ka?..isk diorang ni la x telepon kamu semalam la ni..kak ros da suruh bagitau da smalam.tade klas arini
me : laa..kenapa pulak tade kak ros? kang saya x sempat nak habiskan jalan raya tu..payah la nk buat test nant
kak ros : itu la yg kak ros suruh depa bagitau..JPJ x boleh nak buat khamis ni.depa takmau mai sini sebab x cukup org nak buat test.kalau kamu nak 17 dengan 30 ni je la yg boleh pun.kak ros da try nak suruh buat jugak tp depa takmau datang nak buat macam mana..
me : haduiii..ye la kak ros.nant saya telepon balik.komformkan balik

so..thats it. this 30/11 will be my driving test.hopefully i will not have to extend it again.im so tired of this crap.