Twilight

The new Harry Potter has arrived and is in full bloom. I don't know if I can comment on this phenomena due to the fact that I have yet to read even the cover title of a Twilight book; however, with its initial movie release a few days ago, I figure why not find out more information? Why not see what the fuss is all about?

So I went online on read some reviews. Apparently according to Roger Ebert, "Twilight's about a teenage boy trying to practice abstinence, and how, in the heat of the moment, it's really, really hard ("that's what she....nevermind"). And about a girl who wants to go all the way with him, and doesn't care what might happen."



I didn't have to read any further. I understood the "fuss." I knew why high school and even junior high adolescents are so engrossed in what has become a cult following. Stephanie Meyer hit a chord with her audience: forbidden love. A modern day Romeo and Juliet with a twist. The storyline never gets old and any human being from adolescent to those past their prime knows or can appreciate the storyline. ("Whoever knew the forbidden fruit could taste so sweet?") I mean, who hasn't heard that before?

I must admit, it seems so simple and juvenile; yet, aren't the most appealing creations and/or inventions "simple." (ie post-its, paperclips, bumps on the side of the road to wake up a sleepy traveler, etc..)

Roger Ebert says it best, "Why do girls always prefer the distant, aloof, handsome, dangerous dudes instead of cheerful chaps like me?" I always wondered the same thing in high school and in college for that matter. I considered myself a "cheerful chap" and yet you could find me on Friday nights playing cards with the tards. (I told myself that I'd rather be playing cards than on a date but deep down I knew better). It wasn't until I found a girl willing to be a "tard" and play some cards that I knew I had struck gold....(6 months later we were engaged).

Anyway, back to Twilight. Will I see it? Probably not. Will I read it? Probably not. But I can and will appreciate the hype. I had a girl on my basketball team not practice the other day because and I quote, "I stayed up late watching the midnight showing of Twilight." For some reason, I can't imagine telling my coach that in high school but at the same time she said it with such conviction and honesty that I just shrugged and kept on coaching . I also saw 4 girls go "ga ga" over a Twilight poster in the library with Edward front on center. ("He's soooooo hot!")



Yes, they were freshman but I'm sure 40 year old mad moms in minivans have and will react the same way.

Kudos to Stephanie Meyer (author) and Catherine Hardwicke (director). They didn't reinvent the wheel, they just created a new tread....vampire style.

My Brother Greg

To those who don't know (probably not very many of you), I have a brother Greg who lives in Hawaii. (He and his family are shown above with my mom).

Some of you probably don't read comments on blogs and so I wanted to post his comment in regards to "judging and the alternative lifestyle" especially with what has come down today in the Supreme Court.

I think it is spot-on.

Here it is:

"We judge people everyday and must for our own safety and the safety of others. When the guy in the car swerves in and out of your lane, you give him plenty of space and try to get away from him. When you see someone who looks dangerous on the streets you walk a different direction. When someone asks you for a loan you have to evaluate whether that person is going to pay you back.

It is critical that we make these decisions. Perhaps we over generalize. Maybe the guy in the car ahead of you just spilled coffee in his lap and isn't drunk or a bad driver. I, however, am not going to give him the benefit of the doubt and risk getting killed. I have made the wrong decision on the scary guy on the street and got mugged at gun point (yes he was black and when I see other black guys early in the morning with hoodies and dirty jeans I run - guess I racially prejudice). And I have made the unpaid loan. It is impossible for us to live life without judging and make reasonable decisions based on limited exposure and, to some degree, stereotype. If you don't you are no better then Lenny Small from "Of Mice and Men" - tell me about the rabbits George.

So - on Prop 8. I have been around many homosexuals in my life. Whether through my time in musical theater, living in San Francisco for 12 years, going to a highly progressive law school in San Francisco (Hastings), or having two lesbian bosses for a year and a half (and listening to them argue about doing the dishes in staff meeting - btw as and aside: This couple was planning on adopting a child. When a child became available they were just leaving on vacation. They asked their dog sitter if she would be willing to pick up the baby and watch him until they got home. Thankfully the dog sitter said no, they decided to go on vacation and not get the baby.). Many gays and lesbians are friends whom I think are great people.

Most, however, are highly promiscuous with multiple partners, are predatory sexually, tend to be highly self-centered pre madonnas, and are quite materialistic. Gays have also been significantly responsible for the spread of a major public health epidemic because of their behavior (AIDS) which has cost society and taxpayers billions of dollars. They are neither apologetic not looking to provide compensation. Instead the seek the help and pity of non-gays to help them with their "burden".

I don't mean this to be hurtful or hateful. I am just trying to be honest. Its look in the mirror time. I recognize that I as a Mormon will initially be judged as self-righteous, close-minded, and as having a persecution complex. These judgments of us as a people are probably not far off. I don't get mad about it, I look at myself and try to recognize those poisonous qualities in me, amend them and help people amend their initial stereotypes of me.

The gays and their fellow crusaders are so focused on their failure to appropriate a word (they have all of the rights of married couples under California law) that they are driving people out of their jobs, vandalizing property and spending countless hours protesting during one of the most painful times in our nation's history (economy, war). This is very myopic and self-centered and only serves to reinforce the stereotypes I have of them. It's time to stop the rhetoric and get a grip!"

Holidays

I was thinking the other day about holidays in general and the difference in feeling a child gets compared to an adult when the holidays approach. For the most (I would say), the child is excited: full of anticipation eagerly awaiting that holiday that will either gain them candy, food, presents, colored eggs, chocolates, or at the very least, a day off (or more) from school. There is usually nothing negative associated with the holidays for a child.

The adult/parent on the other hand is usually not very excited: shopping, spending, finding, hiding, deciding, or at the very least, frustrated at one point or another.

Do I sound like a Scrooge? Probably.

But I'm finding as my kids get older, my frustration rises with each approaching holiday.

1. What do to that is exciting and new for New Year's Eve? (note: I always wait until that day to decide and then we usually just play games til 9:00 pm, turn on the TV and watch the ball drop in New York City).

2. What to buy for 36 x 4 other kids so that each student in my kids' classes aren't left without a Valentine? (note: this can get annoying when Target doesn't have SpongeBob Valentines or whatever the choice is that year).

3. Make sure each of my kids have enough green on for St. Patrick's Day so they don't get pinched too hard at school? (note: I always tell them just mark your hand with a green marker but they never go for my suggestion).

4. Where should I hide all my Easter Egg candy and how do I make sure that each kid gets the same amount of candy/eggs in his/her basket? (note: No matter how many precautions are made, the hunt usually ends with someone in tears).

5. Should I buy costumes so that my kids look cool enough or should I find stuff around the house thus letting everyone know that I am a lazy and cash-strapped parent? (note: Halloween is my LEAST favorite holiday of the year from a parent's perspective due to the costume problem, the candy issues, and the job of the parent to either walk with the children door to door or stay at home and hand out candy. There's only so many times I can say, "Oh it's Spiderman...how cool").

6. And then there's Christmas. Should I buy a lot of little things so my kids have more to open on Christmas day? Should I buy a few expensive things but then they think, "That's all I get?" Should I spend my savings only to see them either break that remote control car on the first day or not even play with it at all after they open a much "cooler" present? (note: How many times have you thought, "I bought the perfect gifts this year" only to see your kids searching for more presents and then breaking into tears when they realize that Christmas is over?)

Notice how I skipped Thanksgiving. That's right....that was on purpose. My favorite holiday of the year as a parent. I love my Thanksgiving. It is so simple and yet so rewarding. The kids know what to expect. Every kid gets the exact same thing. There are no presents on Thanksgiving. There is no hidden agenda. There is no shopping at the mall. There is no guessing. There are no tears. Put a turkey on the table. Throw in some mashed potatoes, stuffing, and maybe even a pumpkin pie. Mom cooks, Dad watches football. Maybe even get up early and play a little football with the neighbors. Kids run around, get tired, come home dirty, eat turkey with some ingredient that makes you go to sleep, and WHAM the day is done. Mom is a little tired from cooking but usually gets to take a nap in the late afternoon while a football game is buzzing and Grandpa is snoring in the background.

Kids are happy, parents are happy. Oh yea. There's nothing like Thanksgiving!!!!

Does Judging Others = HATE

Obviously with what has happened lately on this blog and in our society, I have been pondering over a certain question:

Does judging others lead to hate?

Most people believe that we "shouldn't judge others, lest we be judged." I think that works in many instances but I also think there are times when we need to judge others, especially as parents. It has been said, (and I for one am a big believer of this) that our children's friends are HUGE contributors to how our children will turn out. Therefore, is it not our right and duty as parents to judge others and help our children make right choices when it comes to friends? But then as we make that judgment, are we not then showing "hate" towards a particular family and/or lifestyle?

It gets into a little gray area, doesn't it? Some like "Anonymous" would have us believe that very thing. If I don't allow my daughter to be friends with a group of people that practices what I deem immoral behavior, then I am being hateful....which in turn makes me a bigot or a racist or a hater. When in reality, I believe that I am (as a parent) helping her not put herself in situations where peer pressure might make her do things that she doesn't want to do.

Example #1: My daughter wants to hang out with a group of people who like to smoke. I don't want my daughter to smoke. So I say, "You can't hang out with those people." Does this reaction make me a bigot towards smokers or just a good parent?

Example #2: My daughter wants to go to parties where underage kids drink alcohol. I don't want her to drink alcohol so I tell her she can't go and hang out with those kids. Does this make me a bigot towards drinkers or just a good parent?

I would bet that anyone with a rational mind would say, "I was just being a good parent."

So, my question is this: Why can't Christians put their foot down when the very core of their belief and structure is being challenged? Why can't they say, "We don't want our children and our grandchildren exposed any more than they need to be?"

No one complains when they put advisory labels on CDs. No one holds rallies and yells profanities when they label TV shows as G rated or TV 14. No one cries "bigot" when they tell cigarette companies not to angle their advertisements towards teenagers. And no one should blame Christians for finally sticking up for themselves and saying enough is enough.

This same-sex marriage issue has turned into one of hate. One side claiming that the other side is hateful when in reality, it is the exact opposite. The Christians are showing love towards future generations. They are putting the advisory labels on certain behavior and rating them as MA (mature audiences only).

Anybody has the free agency to watch an MA show but what they don't have the free agency to do is show it to everyone on the big screen of life.

This is where I stand on this issue. I will stand up, wave signs, go door to door, and send out mailers when I believe my children and their children are in danger of being put into situations where someone or some group is forcing their way into mainstream.

I'm glad that someone stood up against 2 Live Crew and said, "We are putting an advisory label on your CD."


I'm glad that someone stood up to the TV networks and said, "You need to rate every one of your TV shows."



And I'm hoping that in 20 years, someone will say to all of us Christians, "I'm glad that you stood up for marriage and protected our families."

Utah vs. Laguna Beach

Our friends (Ben and Rachel from Arizona) visited us this weekend. We got to talking about Prop 8 and how Laguna Beach residents voted 68% No and only 32% Yes. Also, there happened to be, (on Friday night) in downtown Laguna, over 300 angry Laguna Beach residents loudly protesting the passage of Prop 8.



So the question was asked: Where would you rather raise your kids: Laguna Beach or Utah? I'm guessing the question was raised because these two places are viewed as the extremes (when talking about levels of goodness) and if given the choice, which extreme would one choose?

It actually made for a good debate.

Utah on one hand has a majority of Mormons. Your kids are surrounded by others who know your values and where you stand. When surrounded by "goodness" does one not tend to be good?

Laguna Beach on the other hand has a majority of "free-thinkers." The high school is documented as the most common drug and alcohol use in Orange County. Therefore, your kids are surrounded by others who don't share your values and don't know where you stand. When surrounded by not such "goodness" does one tend not to be good?

That's the question. Can you raise your kids with the appropriate values and then let them govern themselves accordingly in both environments? I would think I would feel secure in either place. However, regardless of where I lived, I would pray fervently that my child make good choices. In both places, (I believe) my child would be tempted to be either different from the mold (Utah) or go along with the group (Laguna Beach).

Peer pressure is a HUGE thing. Peer pressure to be good or peer pressure to be bad. Will my child choose the "forbidden fruit" or be happy with the surrounding fruit?

Free-agency is such a tricky thing. We want our children to be able to make choices but we crave the ability to force them to make good choices.

The question is: Does living in a certain state or town create a better opportunity for our children to make those good choices? I personally believe the answer is YES and it does matter.

I'm just not sure what place that is so I'm choosing the one with the ocean view. :)

America the Beautiful

Today, I woke up a happy man. Happy in one sense that something I truly and passionately believe in was supported by 52% of Californians (thank you to all who helped Prop 8 pass), and happy in the other sense that although the person I voted for didn't win, America showed that race is no longer a factor when determining a person's merits. That should be reason to celebrate in and of itself.

I believe Barack Obama when he says that America is a better place today then it was only 15 years ago. I believe him when he says he will do the best he can for our country. I believe him when he says that through hope, we can and will have a better tomorrow.

Are there some issues we (as a country) should be concerned about? Sure. Does his party stand for things that I do not. Sure. However, I am excited today. I am excited that our country is now being led by a leader of men. A leader who can bring together both old and young, rich and poor, right wing and left wing. A leader who "hopefully" will deliver all that he has promised and that 4 years from now, our country will have turned the tide, our economic woes in the distant past and our religious freedoms still in tact.

As John McCain said in his concession speech, "It's time to put aside our differences and unite the country and do all we can to support our new leader."

I plan on doing that......(or at least until he demands that same-sex marriage is now OK).


ps I did cry myself to sleep last night....not at the overall election but upon hearing that Jesse and Deanna had broken up. Supposedly it was because they couldn't agree on Prop 8.