Overhearing train conversations
I recently started work and have to take the Harbour Line daily. There is enough banter to keep me entertained throughout my 20-minute journey to and from work. There’s something about Mumbai Locals. Everyone is an accidental philosopher, political analyst, comedian or expert for that brief journey.
As I entered the first-class compartment my station, a group of 4–5 Gujarati businessmen, who seemed to know each other, entered along with me. They couldn’t have been more than 38–40 years old. One of them had a freshly bought copy of Mid-Day, with a front-page report on Osama Bin Laden and how he was put to death. That was enough to get the banter started. The person holding the newspaper was reading it while the others began discussing what must have happened over the past day. I didn’t interrupt, didn’t engage and preferred to just listen.
“The Pakistanis must’ve known he (Osama) was there, otherwise how could he live so lavishly?!”
“No, I think Obama just went in with the correct intelligence reports, shot him down, and left. It all happened within 40 minutes!”
“All that is fine. Just see the guts of these Americans—captured and killed one person who wasn’t even in their custody. And here we are, sitting idle, unable to deal with those already in our hands. Shyaa!”
“I was watching the news and they showed a report about some guy who unknowingly live-tweeted the whole thing. He described how a big blast occurred, followed by silence, and then a helicopter crashed.”
“Yes, I saw that too. He was from Rawalpindi and had come to Abbottabad on vacation.”
“God knows when these Pakistanis will learn. What do they even get out of all this? The Americans got what they wanted. When will India get Dawood and the others? Our government won’t even attack for fear of a nuclear retaliation. What a mad country! (Pakistan).”
Here’s my favourite part of the entire conversation:
“I think it’s all a conspiracy. Obama’s ratings were at an all-time low before this. Look at what’s happened—his re-election is confirmed in 2012! No one can stop him now!”
“These Congress people must be planning the same thing. At the end of their term, they’ll pass the Lokpal Bill, hang Kasab and Afzal Guru, and pitch in Rahul Gandhi. Sure-shot winning campaign.”
“If they’re not planning this, we should suggest it to them! At least then there won’t be an Advani in contention for Prime Minister. But if Modi comes in, that would be best.”
Gujarat (Modi) has suddenly become a role model for all states to emulate. The majority of the Gujarati community wants Modi to continue as Chief Minister of Gujarat. Many even want him as Prime Minister.
By this time my station had arrived, and it was time to get down. They all alighted with me, and we all went our way. In just twenty minutes, these men had covered geopolitics, national frustration, party strategy, and their hopes for leadership - all while swaying between stations. Osama’s capture and death was such a massive topic that people at work were also discussing it in detail. Everyone had their own conspiracy theory to share.
Meanwhile my dad complained that these idiots on news channels kept showing the same footage all day and didn’t update us on the Lokpal Bill discussions that were taking place!