Get to the Inside

You actually make it seem so easy with your presen...

2021-07-08T21:58:58.997-05:00

You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic to be really something which I think I would never understand. It seems too complicated and extremely broad for me. I’m looking forward to your next post, I will try to get the hang of it!
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You ask what kind of marriage would it be where th...

2019-01-23T08:44:56.966-06:00

You ask what kind of marriage would it be where the wife of a sex addict and/or spouse who has betrayed her by having sex with others doesn't consent to sex? This, of course, depends on how much time has passed, however, from personal experience, after finding out that my husband had had multiple affairs on and off-line, the last thing I wanted to do was have sex with him. For me, I needed to feel safe in the relationship if I were going to give myself completely to him. It involves getting the professional help he needs and time in order for me to consent to sex again.

Lovely poems that get us to think about 🌟

2018-08-17T04:42:45.618-05:00

Lovely poems that get us to think about 🌟

Thank you so much for reliving some dark moments o...

2016-02-07T14:19:47.944-06:00

Thank you so much for reliving some dark moments of your inner journey. I am also going through a very difficult spiritual crisis.It's helpful to know others are experiencing similar circumstances. I wish you the best.

I am a sex addict on day 2. I have reviewed what ...

2015-11-07T16:39:52.406-06:00

I am a sex addict on day 2. I have reviewed what my bottomlines or inner circle are and wrote mine out. I also did my secondary or middle circle list of things to watch out for. I am in a relationship but not been faithful to it and I am a bit fearful of going through withdrawals without being able to disclose what is going on with me with my partner. I know I have to find tools, resources, and supportive people to get through it on a daily basis. Anyways, one moment at a time. Thanks for your post.

Thanks for this. Have been in AA for awhile but ne...

2015-10-23T01:38:56.208-05:00

Thanks for this. Have been in AA for awhile but need to recover from my sexual addictions. I'm on the same page with others who have said it's hard to find that happy place. I look forward to working on my bottom line behaviors list so I have at least a place to start.

I am a total love addict. I've never had a no...

2015-03-21T22:00:09.582-05:00

I am a total love addict. I've never had a normal relationship - all are addictive to me. I don't know how to have a non-addictive relationship. I'm depressed and frustrated. I am at day two of no contact. I feel like crying and I'm angry and feel hopeless. I continually look at my phone to see if he texted. He never will. I will put my phone away for a week or so. Glad to know I'm not the only person who lives through this hell repeatedly. Just wonder what it will take for me to be free of this for good.

Melissa, wonderful article explaining withdrawal a...

2015-01-25T16:47:55.395-06:00

Melissa, wonderful article explaining withdrawal and the possible symptoms. I loved your statement, "Recovery from sex and love addiction does not mean you will never be in a relationship ever again, it means you are beginning a relationship with yourself for the first time ever." Perfect! I am wondering what happens when a person has addictions comorbid with sex addiction. Should the addictions be treated one-by-one or do they all need to be treated at one time?

I thought I had been in withdrawal and the pain wa...

2014-08-27T15:53:39.185-05:00

I thought I had been in withdrawal and the pain was overwhelmingly intense.None of my friends really understand.It out of their league.I go to Slaa regular but im finding that im still using bottom line behaviours that I didn't even realise were bottom lines! Abstaining is extremely hard for me as the object of my affections lives in very close proximity and we see each other around.It is a small village.Im terrified of going into proper withdrawal and I fear how bad I will become and if my work will suffer and I lose my home and my sanity! Help!!!

Things that are physically "easy not to do&qu...

2014-08-06T21:04:00.442-05:00

Things that are physically "easy not to do", are also physically "easy to do".
Things that are physically "easy to do", are also physically "easy not to do".

I went though withdrawal on holidays in Europe. I ...

2014-08-06T20:23:36.736-05:00

I went though withdrawal on holidays in Europe. I was very alone, and at times wasn't sure if I needed to get to a hospital. I got through after about three weeks. I remember feeling clean and free, however I subtely got drawn back in. I'm going though withdrawal a second time. This time lots of sore muscles and spasms, fatigue, and I cry all the time. I couldn't hit the right keys on the keyborad so left work saying I had the flu. Do join a slaa, this has been helpful, and make sure you get someones number so you can call them when you need to..

Your article is very helpful thank you very much f...

2014-08-05T06:39:43.209-05:00

Your article is very helpful thank you very much for sharing .

I am in mega withdrawal. It is soooooo hard! What ...

2014-06-23T06:19:43.591-05:00

I am in mega withdrawal. It is soooooo hard! What an email could fix, then go into another cycle of despair and disapointment. No Way!! But, I hate going through this. I have no other addictions left, only sex and love and this is by far the hardest to give you!

I am a grateful member of Slaa and went to a meeting yesterday and tonight. But, because I had a short relationship with another member I also find this triggering. Oh I am in hell right now.

What can I do, pray, mediate and do yoga. Everyday and be grateful to be at the point in my life where I understand i can't 'fix' anyone and especially another addict. The only person I can fix is myself. This is so hard just for today I am not acting out. It has been three weeks and is now even harder.

Grateful for everyone's posts and for your blog. In gratitude and light! Thank you!

I am in this dark night of the soul presently and ...

2014-02-04T00:34:19.554-06:00

I am in this dark night of the soul presently and have been since september 2012. it has been pure hell on earth but i do enjoy studying on the subject as it is a reminder that i am simply in a process.

yours i believe is one of the few sites that ive seen that reminds the viewer that great leaders of the past have had to go through this same process. thats very uplifting and encouraging. i dont wish it was over though. im passed that stage. i'm just trying to not hurt anyone and isolating in the darkest times when im vulnerable and out of control emotionally.

you literally do feel like you're in hell, but i guess that is what ego consciousness is until you go into enlightenment. we dont know any different. be blessed my friend! thank you!!!

I wanted to let you guys know that although I rare...

2014-01-19T09:58:42.885-06:00

I wanted to let you guys know that although I rarely get time to update my blog, I do come here regularly and post comments. These articles on Sex and Love Addiction continue to be some of the most widely read on this blog, and I am so grateful that these words may be a lifeline to some readers who are at their lowest point.

I also wanted to encourage those of you with little to no support systems that SLAA offers online contacts and support http://www.slaaonline.org/ . There are also toll-free phone meetings that you can attend daily. http://www.slaafws.org/meetings I encourage you to find a sponsor, because in those early days and months the pain is intense and the temptation to return to addictive behaviors is very strong. Call your sponsor every day! I am praying for each of you today.

Hi im just wondering if people still post on here....

2014-01-07T03:14:18.349-06:00

Hi im just wondering if people still post on here.
I suffer with Love addiction and im in need of some advice?

My goodness this page has hit me hard.What all of ...

2014-01-06T17:34:58.966-06:00

My goodness this page has hit me hard.What all of you are feeling is identical to how I feel.The pain is unbearable.
Anon from previous post I just wanted to know how you were getting on now? ive only just found this page so your last post is a few months out of date.
Lets all stay strong for each other!

I agree by experience. Withdrawal effects are rea...

2013-12-22T21:20:03.690-06:00

I agree by experience. Withdrawal effects are real. There are other pills out there for anxiety but take a while (maybe weeks) for their effects to kick in.

Good therapy is very rare and more so good therapi...

2013-12-22T21:13:58.521-06:00

Good therapy is very rare and more so good therapists that have good instincts. Therapy should be like talking to a GOOD close friend that is there in a time of need.

Find myself slipping little by little back into it...

2013-12-20T03:46:56.767-06:00

Find myself slipping little by little back into it. I can feel the personality change as I run my life alone once more.
Help me, dear HP to surrender and ask you daily for help.

My fiance is just going through dark night recentl...

2013-09-01T08:26:29.354-05:00

My fiance is just going through dark night recently and until now, I want to help him. And now it gives me a little light and understand him now. I Love him

5 weeks into abstinence. I no longer have access t...

2013-08-07T18:27:31.228-05:00

5 weeks into abstinence. I no longer have access to meetings and the fear, despair and hopelessness are much worse now. Hard to believe that this will end so I am very thankful for these posts.

You pass through it by staying engaged in life. Y...

2013-06-08T10:04:52.295-05:00

You pass through it by staying engaged in life. You continue to get up, put one foot in front of the other, and daily turn yourself over to God. You completely surrender yourself to God's love, because He is heaing you during this time. There is NOTHING you can do to pass through this except to remain engaged in a surrendered position before God, who knows exactly what He's doing. There are days when you will just feel pain and out of sorts. You lean into it, honor it, and know tomorrow will come. It sounds wrong to many of us to think we're just supposed to accept a certain level of hurt, but I've found that to be exactly what is needed. Although you can't see what's ahead for you, there is a loving Creator who sees from the aerial view and knows exactly where you are and how to move you along. You will survive this and come out whole on the other side!

So how does one pass from this night, especially w...

2013-05-05T18:10:52.209-05:00

So how does one pass from this night, especially when all the dark emotions feel so much a part of the soul?

Leprechauns as social commentary...interesting! Di...

2013-03-30T23:18:39.871-05:00

Leprechauns as social commentary...interesting! Did Kristoff make the main character say those things...or simply bring them to the surface?

And I'm sorry you don't have more comments yet. I'll have to be sure to post a reminder in the thread.