AlStuff

PTSD IV

2026-07-11T15:50:19.392-07:00

This will be the last PTSD post.

I promise.

So at the end of my servitude, when I took my separation physical, I made sure they put down on it that I had dislocated my left arm multiple timed, and it now fell out of joint all the time. The medics reaction was to book me for surgery the following Monday.

They performed what was called a modified Puttiplat. Went in and shortened all the ligaments in my shoulder. Then reattached the ligaments. Put my arm in a grenadiers sling, and told me not to use my arm.

They pulled the stiches and sent me on my way about a week before my discharge. My left arm was about as big around as a table leg and totally useless. I could not lift my arm with its own muscles, and I was down too about 150 lbs from being on potent pain killers and not eating..

When I got home I looked like a fugitive from a concentration camp. The first time my mom saw me, she got all "What have they done to my baby'.

The first thing I did was go to the VA to get an assessment. They gave me a small disability pension and sent me on my way.

The only thing I wanted was to disappear, So I packed up my stuff and went over to the family farm in Sandpoint Idaho. I spent the spring and summer working on the farm. I started out splitting kindling, then splitting firewood, and by the time summer was over I was bucking bales, although slowly and painfully.

I was a completely different person than I was when drafted. I was an Alter Boy, The Vice President of the CYO (Catholic Youth Organization) and outstanding boy of the year for 1966.

When I got out I really didn't want to be around people, because I had learned to always be alert because violence was always a possibility. I avoided large groups of people, developed no new friends and kept to myself.

I went back to school and burried myself in studies. My first semester I took 18 solid credits and had a 3.9 GPA. I also began taking amphetamines. At first it was when I was cramming for finals, but eventually it became a daily thing, although I never got addicted and controlled it pretty well. That combined with drinking put me on a pretty ragged path. I stayed on that same path for many years.

I saw various therapists over the years, and they helped me stay on the rails, but the depression kept getting worse. The fact that was on Percocet didn't help matters.

I spiraled out of control until I was peering into the ebyss, and it was beginning to be an alternative. I had gotten as far as planning exactly how I was going to go out.

It was at this point that a couple of things happened. I had asked for a stronger anti-depressant and they sent me to the Psychiatric Clinic for evaluation. They diagnosed me with PTSD. Suddenly the shit all aligned and I finally understood what was going on. Didn't hepl me, but at least I understood what was going on.

I called the VA hot line and they referred me to the local VA clinic, where I strictly by chance got there when the Psychiatrist was there, and we had a nice talk, and she pointed me towards some resources available. I wnt to a Cognitive Therapy group, various interviews and beaurocratic bullcrap.

I applied for PTSD compensation.

They can't find my records, in fact the said no evidence existed to prove that any of the things I went through happened.

They denied my claim. I am still in the appeal process, and have been for about a year. Dealing with the Government is not my idea of recreation. I really don't handle it very well.

After much searching, and help from my grandson, we have managed to locate the record for the court-martial of Earl Pleasant. The record exists, so my testimony and all the circumstances of the source of my trauma is there. Unfortunately it is in paper form. They are in the process of converting the old records to digital files, but that record has not been digitized. My grandson paid them $50.00 to get access to the file when it has been converted, and it was dumped in the queue, with no guarantees of when it would be done. The request went in in December and we still have not herad anything.

All papers and records for my appeal have to be in by August, so I am getting a little frustrated. I am so close to getting the information I need, but it is just out of reach,,

Did I mention I hate dealing with the government?

PTSD III

2026-05-18T19:53:47.354-07:00

After a while, the enlisted members of the Psychiatric Department were transferred from the Hospital to a MASH unit in support of the clinic.

We arrived late at night, and found out we had to assemble our own bunks, find wall lockers, and get set up. It was very disorganized.

Next thing we knew soneone was running thru the barracks yelling about PT. We had no idea there was PT in the morning, but we got up, jumped into our fatigues and went out to endure our morning wake-up.

All five of the enlisted people went out at the same time. Later a message was posted on the bulletin board that one of us was on report for being late. It was Ernie, the only black in our group.

All five of us went to the First sergeants office to enquire. We asked why, when all five of us whent out at exactly the same time, only Ernie got put on report. The first sergeant blustered and stammered, as we asked if he might be prejudiced against black people. He threw a giant fit and threw us out of his office, but Ernies name got taken off the report.

We went back to our bay in the barracks and finished up getting out gear straightened away, when I recived a request to report to the office, I go in and in the center of his desk is my Personnel folder. There on the front cover was stamped in bright red letters 1AO. He started by calling me names and trying to humiliate me for being a Consciencious Objector. He told me that somegow he was going to personally going to make sure i went to jail. I just told him to be ery careful, because he didn't know who he was dealing with. We spent the rest of my time on Okinawa with hi writing me up for an article 15, and me advising him exactly why it would not be a good idea to proceed. As an example, one Sunday I was in my bunk taking a nap when he came by my bunk and ordered me to clean the barracks. I told him i declined, so he ran down to the office and wrote me up for disobeying an order. they called me down to thee COs office and there in the center of his desk was an article 15, which they ordered me to sign.

I of course declined, but added that they were aware that I was a 1AO and that regulation chapter verse and sentence prohibited them from making me work on my religious holidays, and that if I was forces to sign it, my next move would be to go to the JAG office and enter a complaint against them. They looked up the regs ad realized that they had made a mistake. So they tore up the article 15 and tole me to get the **** out of the office. They had no way of knowing that where I say in the reception arera there was a full set of the Regs, which I had been studying in my spare time. Nothing petty tyrants hate worse than a barracks lawyer,

There was a requirement from the Hospital at Camp Kue for a Liason NCO for the locked Psychiatric Ward. So although my work area war in the Hospital, my Barracks was in Sukiran, which meant getting a taxi every morning. No big deal.

Working with psychotics every day was not my ideal. the patients had all been locked up for doing outrageous things.

One morning as I unlocked the ward, the doof was banged open and left me laying on the floor looking at the ceiling. I looke down the hallway to see a little bitty Asian lady staggering down the hall as fast as she could go. II jumped up and ran her down. It was like trying to control a mad dog, but help arrived and we gor her back to the ward.

When we got back to the ward I asked what the heck was going on. They told me she had been admitted the night before. She had drowned her three children in the bathtub, and was out of control psychotic. They had medicated her with 500mg of thorazine, which was enough to medicate an elephant, but barely slowed her down.. I felt so sorry ffor her, being so out of touch with reality that she drowned her three kids.

Another time we had an Air Force enlisted dued admitted. I was never gotten all the details of what he had done, but from what I understood, he had been a discipline problem in his unit so their punishment was to have him do perimiter patrol at night on the airfield. The "voices" had convinced him that there were infiltrators in the jungle so he started unloading rounds. There may have been a B52 involved.

He had been on the ward a couple of days, and he was OK to talk to, so I was getting to know him to assess hs mental state.

One morning he came to me and said he wanted to go play pool in the hospital day room. I replied that I didn't think he was ready to be allowed that much freedom. He picked up a trash can and threw it across the ward and said "Now can I go play pool?" I replied "That king of behavior will not get you what you want" So he picked up a chair and threw it through a window. "NOW CAN I GO PLAY POOL? II told him if he didn't clean his act up, he would end up in restraints.

He ran to the back of the ward and came back with a 12" diving knife and demanded to be allowed to go play pool. AT that moment I left the ward and called the "Goon Squad" which was a group that was supposed to handle anything violent on the ward. They came in and peeked around the corner and saw this big crazy dude with a knife, and turned around and left.

The three enlisted guys left looked at each other and the airman in the group said "Well, we got it to do, so how are we going to handle it. I suggested we go onto the ward and get a mattress of of one of the beds and rush him. we needed to figure out who was going to do what, The Airman took the right end of the matress. His jib was to get behind hin after we got him coralled against the wall. I was in the middle and my job was to make sure he remained under control and pinned to the wall. The third guy was to get control of the knife and make sure he couldn't hurt anyone. It worked very well although there were seeral moments when things were dicey. We had him under control and were yelling "Trank him, get your asses over here and Trank him" which eventually happened.

During my time with the Psych department I learned a couple of behaviors that have never left me.

When entering a room, make sure you know where all the etrnces and exits are.

Never turn your back unless you know everyone present and feel comfortable with them

Always be prepared to go into action in an instant, as you are not in control.

The perversity of the universe tends towards the maximum.

Fishing

2024-11-14T15:55:00.001-08:00

I have always loved fishing.

Even if you dont catch anything there is the enjoyment of being out on nature and away from the pressures of everyday life.

I had been feeling kinda flustered and under some pressure because I had a bunch of physical work that needed to be done but I was behind since my hands had not fully recovered from surgery on my thumbs. Running a chainsaw isn't on the list of approved activities during recovery and I had a 100 year olf fir tree that was dead and needed to be turned into firewood.

It was a beautiful morning forecast for the next day, so I loaded my little rowboat in the back of my old pickup truck and drafter my daughter to be my fishing partner, and set the alarm clock for 6:00.

This is the only time I set my alarm clock since I retired. To go fishing.

It was still dark when we hit the road, stimulated by a couple of cups of coffee.

As we came areund the corner and exited the Hiway, the sun was just peeking out from behind a light spread of clouds. A light whisp of fog was lying over the top of the lake, drifting along at the whim of a light breeze, the sunlight reflected off of the water gave the lake a slight orange cast. I stopped the truck and just sat there for a moment just drinking it all in.

With the optimism of fishermen all over the earth, I unloaded the boat and we transferred out gear into the boat. Rowing was my chosen occupation. I like the low impact exercise of rowing. Quietly dipping the oars and rotating them in aa slow and steady pace inserted me into the peace and quiet of the scene.

My daughter put on a worm and dropped it overside, I had not even baited op, but there was a trout so eager to be caught that he impaled himself on the hook before we had gotten twenty feet from the dock.

I dropped my line over the side and went to help her boat the fish. Before I could get to her, I, too had a fish on. She had a 10" trout and I had a 8" perch. I then rowed to the south side of the lake to our usual spot. we caught and released loads of perch, keeping only the ones we figured were worth cleaning.

We were down to our last few worms ans Lisa was attending to a line snarl. her worm was dangling over the side a couple of inches over the water when we heard splash. we were startled and glanced over where he worm hung and a widening ripple of water showed where a fish had come out of the water to try to get the bait.

we were startled when the fish turned back for a second pass. He hit the bait a second time and it flew out of his mouth. Lis grabbed her pole and tries to coax him around for another attempt. Once she hd the polee in her hand, the fish was nowhere to be seen. after she got frustrated trying to attract hi, I sggested she fix her line, which still had a tangle.

She set her pole down, exactly like it was before.

The fish came back and hit the bait for the third time. This time he hooked himself.

We looked at each other and burst out laughing.

We were out bait and I figured we had probably used up all f out luck any way, so we put away out gear and started back.

Final score 4 nice trout 25 good sized perch an incredible sunrise. Fish that actually caught themselves. A memory that will remain with me forever.

Little House

2024-04-03T14:30:00.000-07:00

I can't pass up a good deal.

So I bought a little house, I know it is a thing lately, but I do like the idea of a small portable living space. All of the RV type of things I have ever owned just didn't really fit my desires

We had some people buy the land next door with the intention of "homesteading" but they had no idea what they were getting into. They got ripped off by the company that cleared the land they had no idea that there was a two year backlog in new house construction.

They bought a trailer to live in and bought a little house bare shed 15 X 30, and had it delivered. Then they finished it out. Divided the interior into a bedroom, bathroom living room and kitchen. Ran all the electrical wiring and plumbing, Sheetrocked the interior, and put some cheap plywood down for flooring. they put in a refrigerator and stove, tub sinks shower. put in a countertop in the kitchen. Painted everything.

Then their plans fell apart and they are going to move, so they offered up the little house for sale. They had invested over $40,000 in it, I offered them $37,500 for it and they accepted my offer.

Lets just say that getting it moved turned out to be more of an adventure than I counted on. After much sweat and cursing and frustration and a bunch more money, it now sits on my property. Not where I wanted it. but it is here.. It still needs a bunch of work, so we have been working on getting it hooked up to water and electricity.

There is no moisture barrier for the floor. so we have to pull up the flooring and add that and then put in some good flooring. They did a terrible job of doing the countertop, so that all needs to be taken out and done over, but none of those things is expensive, just time consuming.

I think that when all is said and done we will have about $45,000 into it all done. I have checked areund anf similar units, fully furnished run 60 t0 70 grand.

Should turn a nice profit.

Disappeared

2023-07-14T11:28:00.006-07:00

I was winding down a busy day, laying in bed, reading a book.

Thw phone rang. A phone call after 10:00 usually means bad news.

It was my friennd and neighbor from up the road.. He said the police were caanvassing the area, asking if people had seen or talked to another of our neighbors, Dan Brewer. He had not been seen since early in the day, when she had said said goodbye and went into town to run some errands. Dan was supposed to go over to a friends place to help work on a tractor. This was at about 9:00 in the morning.

His wife came home in the afternoon, and Dan was not around, so she assumed he was still over helping with the tractor, so she laid down to take a short nap.

When she woke up from her nap, Dan was still not around, so she called the friends house to see if he was still around. He was not there, in fact he had never been there that day, had never called or showed up.

she began calling the neighbors and friends. Still no Dan.

She called thee hospitals then the police.

The police came out and started contacting people in the in the neighborhood. We border on the Olympic Forrest, so the police put up a helicopter who ran search patterns in the area. About that time Search and Rescue was brought in. They brough in a whole group of volunteers to hit the brush and do a search of the woods. A couple of people brought drones but by that time it was getting dark so they called off the search for the night, but were back as soon as it was light.

They searched for a couple oof days, but they found no sign of Dan. The weather had been nasty with mixed freezing rain and snow, and low temps at night. After three days, it became a recovery search as opposed to a rescue.

It haunted me that maybe he had taken a fall and could not get back on the trail, was maybe laying in a ditch somewhere freezing stuck in a ditch with a broken leg or something.

After a couple more days with absolutely no sign of him, they called off the search.

It still haunts me for some reason.

Near and Deer

2022-06-28T12:50:00.000-07:00

Several years ago I plaanted a couple of espaliered five-in-one apple trees. That is when all the limbs are trned to grow along a single plane. If done properly the trees are amazing looking.

I got interested in doing this because we stopped at a Dairy Queen in Raymong, Wa., and along the northern property boundary were a series of espaliered junipers. I had never seen anything like it and it stuck in my brain.

When I was visiting a local nursery i came across these two five-in-one apple tree starts that had been espaldiered, so I had to have them.

It tkes several years to get appreciable results. This spring, the two trees were beginning to look really nice. They had formed a living fence. When in bloom it was pretty spectacular.

And then it wasn't

I live on the edge The Olympic National Forest. 100 yards to the south of my driveway there is a sign that says "PAVEMENT ENDS". The area is inhabited by bear, coyotes, cougar, eagles elk. And deer. Lots od deer.

I had installed an electric fence around the orchard. Three cherry trees, the two apple trees, a couple of hazel not trees. Five feet high. It seemed to be working until it didn't.

I came home from a trip and all thhe blossoms and most of the vegitation had been eaten by the deer. Man was I pissed.

So I now have built a deer fence around the two trees. Seven and a half feet tall. Maybe in a couple of years it will approach the level it was before deermagedon.

The end s near

2022-06-14T18:34:00.001-07:00

I have been working on getting the propeerty line adjusted between us and our neighbors to the South for almost a year.

As a recap, when we had the property line sutveyed between the two properties, it turned out that the prior owner had drlled the well on the neighbors property. It has taken until now to reach the point where I am sure things will work out. I just hired a real estate attorney to write up the legal mumbo jumbo to register the property line adjustment with the county.

All I have to say is that the process is WAY to involved and expensive. But at least I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Water woes II

2021-09-22T18:35:00.000-07:00

Never be too quick to declare victory against the Fates prematurely.

We were sittng and eating lunch when we saw a man we did not know enter our back yard and start setting markers out in the yard. We went out and not so politely told him to get off of our property. He explained that he was a surveyor setting out the boundaries betwewen our property and the lot next door. The problem was, he was putting the stakes out in my back yard.

We had a strongly worded confrontation. I basicly told he was trespassing and if he continued I would defend my property. I told him at the very least, he had neglecteed to inform us who hw was and what he was doing.

When the dust settled it turned out he was a surveyor hired by the people who bought the property next door. It turns out that when the previous owner had his well drilled, he drilled it on the property next door. What a maroon!

When we were purchasing the house, I had specifically asked the previous owner where the boundary was between the twp pieces of property was, and he pointed out a ditch and said "Just figure the other the other side of the ditch", there being a three foot deep four foot dee ditch four drainage across the south sid of the property. Planted on my side of the ditch is a line of mature trees, obviously planted at the same time the ditch was dug. Also the trees were non native species.

I happen to know a little about the law, and was sure that the ditch , having been accepted as the boundary between the two pieces of property for atleast twenty years, could be claimed by me by the principle of Adverse Posession the State of Washington would grant me title to the slice of land. As a last resort.

Since I now have new neighbors, I didn't want to get off on the wrong foot. When I met them they seemed like reasonable people. I figured we could work something out.

I aproachd it from the angle that neither one of us had created the problem, and we needed to work together to find a mutually acceptable solution. Things went back and forth for several months. I finally came up with a solution where each of us ends up with the same square footage.

We are doing a boundary line adjustment. It is of course a very complicated and expensive process, But it needs to be done properly. I don't want any complications down the road. It was imperative that I gain title to the well.

So here it is six months later and the solution remains some undefined distance in the future,

The guy that did their survey won't work with me. That's OK with me. The dude told several lies to the people next door, so I dont trust him any further than I could throw his transit.

Turns out the Olympic Penninsula is undergoing a great expansion right now,nand every surveyor in the county is wrapped up for months. After a couple of months I ffinally signed a contract with a surveying company. The process is hideously expensive, unreasonably complicated, and takes too much time.

SO I am now obligated to follow through with the process.

In the end it will cost me something like ten grand, but my conscience is a hard master.

At least I will be able too sleep at night and look at myself in the morror.

Water Woes

2021-02-22T11:15:00.001-08:00

I love living out in the country. We are about five miles from town (Sequim, Wa. Pop 4500).

It is very quiet out here, We are seranaded by coyotes frequently. Deer wander through the yard, and I have a little war with them about who has grazing rights to the garden. The Sequim elk herd wanders through here a couple of times a year.

The major drawback had been Water. We have a well, which is rated at 6gpm, which is adequate for a regular sized ramily. The water is high in rust and calcium. it leaved a hard white deposit on things. But that has not been the major problem. Shortly after we moved in, rhe pump failed. Since the well is 180 feet deep, it needs a pretty poweful pump. To pull all the pipe and replace the pump wes a couple of grand.

Thw pump was 20 ywars old, so no big deal if it wears out every 20 years.

the next year, in August, the well got down to the point is startd sucking up air. Water supply up here on the side of the hill, water supply is really hit or miss. While our well is rated at 6gpm, there is a well next door that is about a hundred feet from our well that is rated ar 20gpm. Across the road and up a little the neighbor drilled two that turned out dry. The people up behing drilled twp wells ro get tw0 gallons a minute.

This summer, for the third time in fivr years, we started pulling air in the lines. I decided that it was time to address the problem, so I started calling around to find a plumber to work with. I went with the people that put in the new pump a couple of years earlier. Mind you, skilled tradesmen are in great demand out here. It took me at least a month to convince the plumbers that yes, I wanted to proceed, and yes I could afford it. By the time all was said and done, the tank did not arrive until early November. I had been trrying to get someone to build a pump shack and do the wiring. This included digging a 95 foot long trench to run the wiring through. There was already a 220 volt line running to the existing pump, but it was 12ga wire, and it would require at leasr 10 ga.

I could not find anyone to build the pump shack, so I decied to do it myself. Not a big deal. I started looking at prefab building, and not only were they expensive, they were not very robust., so I decided to design and build it myself. so I did.

The plumbers don't do electric, and the electrician doesn't do plumbing, and neither one digs ditches. so I was promoyed to chief ditch digger, as well as conttractor and carpenter. The building got built.

Then there was the ditch.

The soil here is not conducive to ditch digging. There is about two inches of duff anderlaid by a layer of compacr clay and gravel. Think of it as concrete. It cannot be shovelled, it has to be broken up. I have a six foot prybar, pointed on one end I used to break up the clay so it can be shoveled. This is all a part of a natural drainage, so the ditch fills up with water as you work. It is cold, nasty work. but it got done.

When the tank first came in, I got an estimate for the electrical work, and set up a date for Feb 9th. The electrician showed up, but could not complete his work, because the plumbers had not communicated their requiremens, so he had no idea what amperage and how many circuit breakers were needed. the plumbers came a couple of days later and bitched that the electrician had not completed the elecrical work. I told them to go ahead and do everything they could, set up the tank and fill it anf get ready for the cutover.

One of the decisions I made early on was that I wanted to install a whole house filtration and water softener system. Kinda expensive, but worth it in the long run.

So here it is six months later, and I am out ten grand. The work is not complete, The iron extractor unit is being run off of an extension cord, and the water softener is not hooked up. The electrician is scheduled to come back on March 2nd.

I have filled in the ditch, and we don't have to worry about running out of water anytime.

Progress.

Logging

2020-10-23T14:01:00.000-07:00

Our place is 3 1/2 acres, heavily wooded with jusr the area right around the house cleared. I have been slowly cutting down a few dead trees here and there. mostly they become firewood, although there was the one incredible Maple stump that was so incredible that I have been turning it into custom wood furniture.

My neighboe up the road has a little sawmill. He specializes in furniture grade dimensional lumber, fence buards and trim. He is well known enough that the local Home Depot sends people his was if they need more cedar than the store stocks. He has 40 acres, so he has been selectively cutting trees on his place for 20 years..

When out in the yard this summer I looked up and saw a big cedar, standing there dead. So I went out in the woods to check it out and started looking close at thetrees. There were a bunch of dead cedars out there, So when I ran into the neighbor, I asked him if he wanted to come down and fell the trees. He could have the logs in exchange for the work, as it required putting in a road and clearing some land to get in to the trees. We ended taking out 17 trees, plus he took down a couple of other dead trees. Two Hemlocks, a couple of small maples and one sizeable Douglas Fir. I had a couple of the douglas firs cut into two inch slabs, so I can cut them into whatever size I nees.

I akso asked him to cut me six 2X6s X 6 foot to make a trestle style base for a dinng room table I am working on.

Most of the cedars were rotten in the center at the bottom, so all that wood will become firewood.., plus all the stuff too small to be cut into lumber, plus the hemlock, doug fir and maple. In all it will account for probably three cords of wood. (for the uninitated a cord is a stack 4' x4' x8'. or 128 cu.ft.) I already have about 6 cords of firewood in the wood shed and under tarps behind the garage. I al running out of space..

If I do any more, I might have to sell some. At the prices firewood is going for, I might make enough to make it worth my time.

Once More into the breach

2020-09-30T19:58:00.000-07:00

I have fought with depression for many years. Starting in the Fall, I spiral downwards towards the pit. I always go to the doctor and request an anti-depressant.

They are of some help, but most of them have side effects. The question becomes when do the side effects become more difficult to handle than the benefits.

I have a condition called Familia Tremors, which causes my hands to tremble. It is a genetic condition inherited through my dads siide of the family. It interferes with my ability to do fine work. As my current favoriite creativity is woodworking, I have to be careful. Sharp tools and trembling hands do nor go together very well. Almost every thing they have given me tp try makes my tremors worse.

WWellbutrin worked OK except that I hd big problems with impulse control. I would go off before I even thought about it. So that was a no-go.

Prozac my hands trembles, fluoxetene same,, BuSpar I turned out to be allergic to. Broke out in hives. I hav tries three or four others. None were a good fit.

Right now they are trying Cymbalta, which seems to be working with no bad sided effects.

The kicker is that it can be hard on your kidneys in some people. I hae stage four kidney disease, brought on by my diabetes and long term pain problems. I used Ibuprofin like it was candy to manage my pain for years. That and my hobby of home brewing along with my djabetes wrecked my kidneys. Being in pain 24/7 is no fun, so they have me on Percocet. J hate it, but it does an efective job of handling the pain. I use as little of it as I can, but with arthritis in my neck, sholders, thumbs, hips and lower back, if I want ti do anything I need to take some. Currently I use about three a day.

So although I seem to have found an antidepressant that works well, It will pprobably be too hard on my kidneys fot long term use.

So around and round and round she goes.

Political Ethics

2020-06-30T19:43:00.002-07:00

I have spent considerable amount of time trying to understand the current political situation.
I am a Liberal. Although that term has been used as a term of disparagement by the ultraright it is actually a compliment.
I have family and friends that are conservative. Some of them are even intelligent, have degrees abd everything. So I really do not understand how they can be so fanatically devoted to the ignorant piece of slime that currently occupies the White House. He isn't capable of making a coherent statement, is completely ignorant of History, world politics, and other peoples feelings. He has abused or mocked women, minorities, the disabled, anyone from another country, anyone who is not white.
How can relatively normal people forgive the many flaws of this egotistical flawed narcicistic moron.
I meanI have actually thought about this.
I have come to the conclusion that they lack empathy. They are incapableof puting themselves in someone elses shoes, of seeing things from someone elses point of view. People fleeing from political opression and worse are "drug dealers and criminals". Women are rated by their looks and if they should dare take him to task are "nasty women", and if you are famous you can "grab them right by the pussy".
The rest of the world looks at us and says "Is this the bes they can do?"
I wonder the same.

Life's a Riot

2020-06-08T21:07:00.001-07:00

Living out here in the woods of the Olympic Penninsula, I have become more of a spectator than a participant. And for the most part that is fine with me.
The present state of things has been a long time comin'. Under the current administration, the reality of racial inequity has become all too obvious. I w that good can come from all this turmoil. There are valuable lessonsoleheartedly approve of the protests, but not the riots and looting. Although it can be hard to separate the two since they happen together, it is neccesary to separate the two.
Back in the dark ages of my teen years, I marched in civil rights marches, got tear gassed, and really thought I was part of the solution. It saddens me that things have not changed all that much. Sure, the whites only drinking fountains are gone, and the black vote has become a political f wind up dead at the hands of police for imaginary or minor offenses. The protests are appropriate. Unfortunately the criminal elements of society use the protests as a platform for riot and looting.
That's only half the equation. The response from authorities is the other half. The response of the police is is either nonexistent or disproportionate. The authorities must recognise the right of the participants to demonstrate, and ideally demonstrate solidarity with the protestors. Too often the response of the authorities creates an atmosphere of us versus them, The key is communication, on the street level. Listening to stuffed heads spout platitudes isn't going to get it. Person to person, one on one communication is what it will take to get people to recognise their similarities, not emphasize their differences. I don't know how that looks, but there are much smarter people than me out there that should be able to figure the details out.
On the other end of the spectrum, you have the incident at Forks.
A racially mixed faminly traveling in a converted school bus, travilled from Spokane to the Olympi penninsula to go on a little camping trip. Some moron in Forks decided they were ANTIFA activists com to riot and loot. The total lunacy of this escaped them. So thay hazed them out of town. The family set up to camp for a couple of days, A group of misguided teens with chain saws and felled a bunch of trees so they could not get out.
It is an embarassment to everyone who lives out here. The whole thing sounds like a cheap episode from some second rate made for tv show.
It is possible that much good can come from this. If people do not recognise the legitimacy of the protests, the next ones will be more violent, so it is in out own best interrest to act now.

Goin' to the dogs

2020-05-13T11:48:00.000-07:00

Been a rough weel.
We have this Brussels Griffon dog. He is my wifes constant companion, walking buddy and confidant. He is a very good boy, yes he is.
He is also a financial drain and a lot of work.
He has cataracts, so he really cant see well. He walks into things. he will also walk right off the bank and into the ditch. He is an insulin dependant diabetic.
Somewhere or the other the last week he walked right smack into something sharp. I suspect it was a blackberry vine. So we took him into the vet and he had an eye infection. So on top of his insulin injections, he has four eye medications.
Then he developed the shhits and pukes. took a stool sample into the vet last Friday. They were closed for the weekend, so we had the weekend ffull of cleaning up puke and crap. Nor a whole lot of fun. He couldnt hold anything down, so we were tring to keep him hydrated with pedialite. he was worse on Saturday, worse on Sunday. We werent sure he was going to make it, neither one of us got much sleep. Carol was crying and i was trying to be the strong one.
By Monday when the vet opened we were a mess, and we handed over Monk not sure we would ever see him alive again.
Turns out he had giardia, which is a parasite from unclean water. Don't know where or how he could have picked that up. He is an inside dog, and when he goes out, he is on a leash. Untreated it can be fatal.
They took him in and rehydrated him and treated him for the bugs, and he is much better, About $500 better.
Still, having to seriously consider life without the little bugger, iit is a relief to hear him warn us about the UPS driver, or a truck driving by, or a jet flying over, or another dog barking in the distance,orr...............

Procrastination.

2020-05-02T11:01:00.000-07:00

I am a world class procrastinator. This blog is a perfect example of that.
I have started to make an entry into my blog several til
mes his tear, but find that I don't like where it is going, or find I am not ready to talk about things or just lake immagination.
So like this is about start six or seven.
2019 was a difficult year for me. My mom died. I have always been a nit of a mamas boy, so it hit pretty hard when I finally came to the realization that I could no longer just pick up the phone and talk to her. This was a PERMANENT change to the fundementals of the Universe. It just wasn't fair. It made an already cold universe just one minescule degree colder. So you hunch your sholders against the cold and march forward.
Then Keith died. It's not like Keith was that close to me. He was my daughters significant other. He was my friend. Having to watch hims fade away and die of Pancreatic Cancer was a terrible experience. He went from a very robust strong guy to a walking skelleton drifting through a world wnere pain was the main feature of the landscape. It just exposed that the universe is indeed a cold and uncaring place where we stumble along doing the best we can whils things crumble around us. The universe became just a little bit colder, but what can you do?
You hunch your shollders and march fotward in the hope things get better around the bens.
So woth new years, I approached the new decade with the sincere attitude that things will improve.
Man did the universe drop kick my ass.
It is not ver ofter in life that yo go through an experience completely out of your control that illustrates to you just how insignificant you fruely are.
This had been one of those times when you know, when you are absolutely sure that things have just changed forever. In terms of my personal life, not as significant as the other two events, but somehow more pervasive because it doesn't just efect me, but all of humanity forever. It is a journey where we have no idea what things will belike when it is over, but are aware that things will be changed forever for everyone. What this looks like in the real world, I have no idea.
One can hope that this experience will show us all how fragile our place in the world is, and therefore make us a little kinder, a little more considerate, a ;ittle more helpfu.
OR. The big or. We beome more insular, more selfish, less empathetic. HEY! I might NEED those 370 rolls of toilet paper and to hell with the little old lady that has crones disease and just crapped her Depends. I NEED that case od hand sanitizer and to hell with the caregivers for whom it caouls be life saving not just for then but for all the people they come in contacht with.
So we hunch our sholders and march forward, not quite sure that the place we are bound is any better than the place we are right now, and may be a whole lot worse.

p

Where to start

2019-11-20T16:25:00.000-08:00

Haven't been around here much lately. I really don't know why.
It's not like I don't have anything going on. It's also not like I don't have the time.
I do happen to be a semi-pro procrastinator. I'd go pro, but can't find anyone willing to pay menthe salary I so justly deserve for my years of experience.
Life's hard when you won't compromise your standards.
So, we bought a new vehicle. A Jeep Wrangler Sport 4X4. Paid cash, so no car payment. So how does this relate to proceastination?
Our Chev HHR was getting old, It was 12 years old and things were starting to go wrong with it
We were on our way to a doctor's appointment in Port Angeles when the battery light came on.
Then the car started acring weird. I mean posessed by the devil weird.
The traction control light cme on and went off, the brake warning light flashed, and the doors started locking and unlocking all by themselves. The car died, then restarted itself. It stoped, and I pulled off the hiway.
The doors locked themselves.
The alternator had died, so the car ran off of the battery until it ran totally down. then quit.
I had put off buying a new car as long as I could.
So we decided it had reached the point of no return.
We love the new Jeep.

So long Keith

2019-06-11T17:27:00.000-07:00

Tough day yesterday.
I drove my daughter, Elisa, over to Seattle to see Keith. Keith is her significant other. A nice gut, a talented carpenter, hard worker. A guy that was footloose and an adventurer, he had spent the last nine summers mining gold in Alaska. He didn't get rich, but always made wages, with a little left over. Kinda like a couple of month vacation for free.
Last year I grubsteaked them for a grand, with the agreement that they would pay me back with an ounce of gold. Overall, they broke even, with a little eft over.
Keith had no problem finding work, as he has an excellent reputation as a talented carpenter and a hard worker. Everything was going according to plan.
Then he started having abdominal and back pain, and one day his eyeballs turned yellow.
The diagnosis was devastating. He had pancreatic cancer that was inoperable. The cancer was pinching odd the bile duct on his liver, so they installed a stent to allow the bile to drain, but there was nothing to deal with the underlying cause.
So since November we have had to watch him decline.
He steadily lost weight, and went from around 190 down and down and down.
When I saw him to say goodbye yesterday, his chart said that he weighed 123 pounds.
He looked like he had just been freed from a concentration camp.
He faded in and out. Sometimes he was there, sometimes not.
I got to say goodbye and get some sense of closure.
It is very difficult to believe in a God who tortures people to death slowly. No man could have devised a nastier way to kill someone.
So I told him I would see him on the other side, and shed a few trees.

Winning With Weed

2019-06-07T12:24:00.000-07:00

Lately I have been seeing a lot of posts on facebook about Weedstock, which is my term for the feeding frenzy developing around the possible financial gains to be made around the legalization of Marijuana.
Reminds me of the idiocy surrounding the .com frenzy. People who have no idea what they are doing are presented with an "opportunity" that sounds good and should in theory should make a bunch of money without doing anything.
Is there an opportunity to make a ton of money in the marketing and sale of legalized weed?
Hell yes!
Are you going to make it investing in every two bit grow operation?
Hell no!
Out of the thousands of small businesses will still be standing when the smoke clears, which ones Will still be standing is something no one can predict. It would take a lot of research to sift through all the hype to figure out who actually has a product or service that actually have value.
My money is on Big Pharma. They will find some way to control supply and distribution. Or some legal doorstop to keep it all in house.
Take your hard earned your money and buy some boring solid investment that has a guaranteed return over time.
Remember, if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

So Long MOM

2019-04-21T15:01:00.000-07:00

a week ago today, my Mom passed away. She Had been in poor health for the last year or so.
She Had been in and outof the Hospital several times recently.
Each time she came back a little weaker. She set up a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) order,
She crashed about three weeks ago, and the family made arrangements for a Hospice worker to visit. Then we set up the deathwatch, so that one of her kids was with her tenderfour/seven.
Since I live three hours away, I was not able to participate as much as some of the other family members that live closer.
I went in and stayed Tuesday night and Wednesday with her. Not one of the easiest things I have ever done, but not that bad either, since she was mostly unresponsive.
When I showed up I went in and stood at her bedside and let her know I was there, for a brief moment her eyes focused and she smiled at me.
She was a great mom.
Growing up when I saw shows like Leave it to Beaver, I thought that was the way all families were. Dad Worked, mom ran the house, and the worst that happened was that somebody picked on you at school or you got In a fight, but home was this comfortable safe place. Stable. Loving.
It wasn't until I got out in the world that I found out that we were the exception.
We were never beaten as children, but Mom was the possessor Of the dreaded wooden spoon. The spoon was more of an insult to your dignity that pain.
All seven of us siblings (Three boys four girls) is an intelligent, stubborn, independent person, ans keeping us all under control must have been a lot like herding cats.
But we all turned out fine. No drug addicts drink or criminals in the lot. Not to say we never got into trouble or stretched the boundaries.
My favorite memory is the Fall we spent canning Peaches. Dad had gotten some super deal on fresh peaches. We spent several days blanching peaches, sterilizing jars, cutting up peaches and spooning into jars with a little syrup water. Spent a lot of time talking and joking and making light of the work. We canned 13 boxes of peaches, which turned into over 100 quarts in the jar..
She always loved going berry picking, and made wonderful Freezer jam. Blackberry was her favorite. When I moved out to Sequim, I saw a few blackberry bushes, so I started looking around for more, and soon found enough here and there to make jam, so for the last few years I have been her source for home made jam. She always appreciated it, because she understood the time and effort it took to get the berries. And the love that it was made with.
So from now on, when I stop and make toast and blackberry jam, I will be thinking of her.
Not a bad way to remember your Mom.

Snowmageddon 2019, Sequim

2019-03-01T11:55:00.001-08:00

On a Friday about six weeks ago I had an appointment in Silverdale to go to the Pain Clinic. The appointment was for 9:20. Snow was forecast for afternoon
I needed to make a decision about which car to drive The HHR gets around 30 mpg on the open road. It has front wheel drive and pretty good tires. Or the Dodge which had four wheel drive but gets about 10 mpg but has brand new 23 inch mud meats.
I figured I could get to my appointment and back before the snow get bad enough that I would have any problems. Valley Road, a dude in a Pickup truck came to a compete halt in the middle of the road. Once I lost momentum, it was all over.
A kindly neighbor eventually came by and pulled me up to the top of the rise. I eventually made it the last mile home, but there was no way for me to make it up the driveway. Our driveway is about fifty yards long and uphill all the way. So I parked the car at the foot of the driveway and walked.
The car remained there for two weeks. I managed to move it to the side enough that the Dodge could make it past. Richard, my neighbor came by woih his excavator and cleared the driveway.
But even if we could make it to the road, the roads had not been plowed.
After about a week, the roads got plowed enough that the Dodge could get around, and we could do some shopping.
We had gotten 32 inches of snow. Paths had to be shoveled out to get to the cars. to get to the woodshed, to get to the greenhouse, for a dog run, and last but not least the driveway.
After 10 days, Carol decided that the roads were clear enough that she could make it to town to get her haur done. About the time she put down the phone, it started to snow It wasn't sticking much, so she set out for town. Ten minutes later she was back. She had gotten about a mile from home and the snow had gotten bad enough thet the car started sliding, so she wisely came back and got the chauffeur (me) and made it for her hair appointment.
The truck had no problems.
We still have about 12 inches of snow in the yard.
The melting snow ripped the gutters off the garage, but the house and awning have come through fine.
Snowmageddon HAH!~
We will rebuild

Things Fall Apart

2018-10-26T18:05:00.001-07:00

I haven't posted on a quite a while, mainly because I never took the time to sit down and do it. I guess I have fallen out of the habit. I need to set aside a specific time every day and just do it.

Things have not gone well in the last week

First, I had gone in to town to pick up a few things, like lacquer for a table I am working on. As I was coming back, going up third ave. I downshifted and a loud rattly clatter, clatter, and the truck quit running.

I managed to get off the road. I got out and raised the hood. A small wisp of smoke drifted up from the engine by the exhaust manifold. On closer inspection there was a hole about the size of my fist in the block. I have been wanting to get a different truck for a couple of years, but was having a hard time selling the idea. Guess I get my truck. It was kinda weird because although the truck had the correct amount of oil and water, neither one spilled on the road. So now I am looking for a used 4 X 4 truck. I am in no hurry.

Then our daughter Lisa's fiance' Keith came down sick. We all had a cols at about the same time, but he just kept getting worse and worse. Then he started having belly pain. And it kept getting worse. On Wednesday his eyes turned yellow, so he went to the Hospital. He had a mass on his pancreas that was blocking the bile duct on his liver, so they shipped him off to Tacoma for surgery. The result was not good. He has inoperable cancer of the pancreas. At this point we don't know how much time he has or what he wants to do. He implied today that he wants to go back to Missouri where his mother is, but we don't know anything yet. He will be coming back here tomorrow, and I guess we will have to figure it out from there. I feel so sorry for Lisa. She finally found someone who is perfectly suited for her, and she is going to lose him.

Spalted Maple Table

2018-08-05T20:58:00.000-07:00

End of the Alley

2018-06-05T20:59:00.000-07:00

When I was n the Army on Okinawa from 68 to 70, I helped start a nightclub.
There wasn't a lot of decent entertainment there. Tittie bars, strip clubs, and a few pitiful music clubs attempting rock n roll. On the weekend we would wander around looking for something different.
Bt we, I mean the enlisted personnel of the Psychiatric Service Clinic in Sukiran.
Sukiran had no nightlife, but Kadena was right down the road.
We were exploring the bars and ended up in a little hole in the wall bar having a drink when this chick strolls in with a guitar. Single white women were a rarity, and a chick with a guitar had our interest.
We asked her to play us a tune, and she did 500 Miles. Cool.
I played and sang, so it was suggested I play a tune. I pointed out that I played left handed, with the strings backwards. She said "In case you didn't notice, this IS a left handed guitar."
Holy Shit! What a convergence of stars.
So I played a finger pickin' version of Don't think twice. She countered with another folk tune, I played Portland Town.
Back and forth. The place slowly filled up until we had a pretty good audience. Then another guy walked in with a guitar, and he joined in. We were having a great time, drinking beer BSing and trading tunes and tunings. When I came time to leave, the two Okinawan ladies who owned the place cornered us and said "You come back Tomorrow, yes?"
So we did.
They had set up a small stage and a mic. and a couple of speakers. Word had gotten around and there was a pretty good crowd. We had a blast.
This was a weekends only thing, but every weekend we put together an open mic night. They owners expanded the stage and the bar twice, and Saturday nights it was standing room only.
It became too much BS and I dropped out after a while, but for a while I was a part of something great.
Funny how things slide in through the back of your head and pop up in you consciousness.
Here's something that popped into my head today

Moose Goosers

Then moose goosers ain't they a gas
sneak up on them moose
an goose 'em in the ass
Goosin' them big moose
goosin' them tiny
sneak up on them moose
goose em in the hiney
You can be a moose gooser
ain't nothin to it
SNeak up on that moose
then you goose it.

Arthritis & Stuff

2018-04-11T11:42:00.000-07:00

As I get older, the accumulation of damage I have done to my body over the years adds up.
I have bad arthritis in my neck. When it is bad, in addition to the pain in my neck, I can lose feeling in the thumb and forefinger of my right hand, or ring and little finger of my left hand. This is the result of multiple rear end accidents in the car. Not me hitting someone, but someone hitting me. I used to say I ought to just paint a bullseye on the back of my car.
My left shoulder is messed up from my time in the Army, for which I receive a small disability pension. When it is bad, it feels like my arm is going to fall off. I strained it the other day splitting wood, so I have an appointment at the Orthopedic Clinic on Friday to get a cortisone shot. Cortisone to me is a magic bullet. Immediate relief.
Did I mention my appointment is on Friday the 13th?
My neighbor up the road has a small one man sawmill. He also has 40 acres and sells custom cut cedar lumber. He is down to making 2 X 4s because he has used up all the larger stuff. I had asked him to take a look at a tall dead Douglas Fir I want to take down. He got real excited when he saw some of the cedars on my property. I have some large cedars that are close to four feet in diameter. Prime cedar of that size is getting hard to find.He has suggested a couple of ideas of mutually beneficial plans for him to get his hands on some of my trees.
Of course he wants the largest trees, and those are the ones I don't want cut.
I would like a small road put in around the perimeter of the property just so I can get to the areas with my pickup. He has a backhoe.
I want siding for the greenhouse. Cedar would look nice.
I want to build a wood shop. A combination of fir and cedar would work well.
Lots of possibilities.
The neighbor is off fishing in the Colombia for walleye.
We have agreed to get together and come up with a plan when he gets back.
Until then I have handrails to cut and peel for the deck.

Sledding Hill

2018-03-26T12:28:00.001-07:00

When you go to the end of our driveway and look to the south, the pavement ends in about a hundred yards. On the left side of the road, there is one house about a quarter of a mile south. On the right there is not another house. There is National Forest and Olympic National Park. The next house would be somewhere around Hoodsport or Shelton.
The road goes up. Then it goes up, then up from there. I have heard that the uphill is constant for seven miles. I have heard that the grade is 14 percent, which is pretty steep. I have driven to the top once.
Around a half of a mile up the road is a steel gate, which is always open. Another half a mile up the road is another pair of gates, which are usually closed except during hunting season. One of the roads goes across the side of the hill, the other continues up.
There is very little vehicle traffic on the unpaved road. Especially when it snows.
Where the road changes from paved to gravel, a road takes off to the West. There are several houses on that road. It dead ends about a quarter a mile in.
This makes the hill an excellent sledding hill. The snow compacts well, and the road ends up very slick. The last time it snowed, we had to rescue three vehicles from the ditch. A fourth truck made it out without our help. Three of the four were on the same 40 foot stretch of road.
You need to have a sled that steers, because the road is not straight. Not a lot of sharp turns, but enough that you will end up in the ditch or maybe over the embankment. I think I need to invest in an old runner style sled.
If they open the upper gate, the sled run is 7 miles long, and I have heard you can reach speeds of 40 mph.
What could go wrong?